Reviews for Legos
LrafaelxD chapter 1 . 3/16/2013
Hahahahahah... super funny story really liked it! :)
XXXHACKERXXX101 chapter 1 . 2/15/2013
cool story, it's really good
Galvantula866 chapter 1 . 12/12/2012
Wally is like a little kid with his Lego fire truck. As someone who has stepped on a few of these pieces during his life time, I know just how painful they can be to bare feet. Superboy's musing on this little toy piece was in tune with his character on YJ and guessing that this piece may had been part of Red Torando was a smart one on his part.

I feel sorry for SB not getting any toys to play with during his 'stay' at Cadmus. As I grew up with the 'Kid' version of him, seeing Superboy being so melancholic is still a alien feeling to me. But I'm warming up to this more serious view of our favorite Superman clone. His interactions with Kid Flash showcase that while he's more mature in his viewpoints than the speedster, he's still lacking in other ways that normal people take for granted.

I didn't see any huge errors here. A solid "piece" here and a nice read.
erihan chapter 1 . 11/5/2012
you cannot break a lego they are made of super spac plastic, evn with getting run ove and chewed by a dog it was still usable
persevera chapter 1 . 11/2/2012
Very cute-Superboy being introduced to play by a very patient and understanding Wally, a Legos afficianado.
The Death Frisbee chapter 1 . 10/31/2012
I'm in a silly mood amidst grading, so hope you don't mind that I went here!

I liked the scenario you've painted; Superboy is amusingly space-cadet in this, and we all can identify with the pain of stepping on Legos.

At points, you tell a bit too much instead of showing - with frustration in his tone, for instance. What, specifically, is it about the tone that makes it sound frustrated? Not knowing Superboy personally (haha), I can't see this for myself; it's your job to make it visible, or more accurately audible, for me.

Other than that, no major crits except for SPAG (but mind, in particular, comma splices and dialogue punctuation). An amusingly lighthearted scenario that hits several beats in a short amount of words, and has a distinct plot to it.

Hope this is useful! SPAG follows.



in front of the other, was an easy task - separate parenthetical clause
"What?" he asked aloud.
wasn't sure why it was lying
short-lived, since SUperboy
asked, as Wally snatched
replied, as he waved
repeated, with his eyebrows
yellow and red. " - Right back - same actor; same paragraph
gray if you're American, not grey
let's see..." - no comma necessary
Yeah, that piece
into place," Wally instructed, as he reached over and pushed down the piece, until a small snap
try this one. It goes - comma splice
right there," he instructed, as he handed
into place, but several pieces also fell off - comma splice
chunk back on, but instead - comma splice
replied, with frustration
Let's try it again," Wally said, as he scooped
xXRisslovesyouXx chapter 1 . 10/12/2012
Aww this was cute! :3 There aren't very many Wally/Conner bonding fics out there; brownie points for originality! :)
me494 chapter 1 . 10/9/2012
Lol! I could totaly see this happening. nice job! :)
Tterit chapter 1 . 10/8/2012
Awe you put it up! Awesome, and I really do love it :)
Tagalong chapter 1 . 10/8/2012
Great job! I'm like Superboy. I always break my Lego stuff... That was really fun to read. It made me smile. Thanks for accepting my challenge!