Reviews for Revenge of the Phoenix
Guest chapter 11 . 7/12/2016
Wow, you skipped over a lot of details. It was revealed that James was alive? When did that happen?

It's the Great Hall, not the Grand Hall.
Guest chapter 9 . 7/12/2016
You never told us if Hermione believes Harry or not. And what made her change her mind about Prongs? She seems to suddenly believe that it's really James Potter.
Guest chapter 8 . 7/12/2016
How can something be too big to fit two people? You say that the invisibility cloak is too big to fit two people. That makes zero sense.

How did the twins know where Hermione was? Did they see her on the map before she was put in the room? The Room of Requirement doesn't show up on the map, remember.

Have James and Sirius had a reunion yet? Why hasn't that been mentioned? Surely it would be better for Sirius to hide at Potter Manor?
Guest chapter 7 . 7/12/2016
Do they really not realize the Neville is an elemental? How does he know about them then, and that Hermione is one?

Why has no one reported Ron's attacks on Hermione? That's twice now he's tried to kill her.
Guest chapter 6 . 7/12/2016
Wow, so many things wrong in this chapter.

Neville doesn't have blonde hair.

Why is no one wondering why the carriage is going in a different direction? There also doesn't seem to be a purpose for it. Was the fire supposed to hurt them?

What happened to the thestrals? Why does it take Luna to get the carriage going again?
Guest chapter 5 . 7/12/2016
What do you mean Harry doesn't know why his father waited until now to come forward? That should have been one of the first questions Harry asked him!

What is up with ignoring everything? Hermione's bracelet ends up on fire, and Neville is the only one who thinks there's something weird about it? Why did Neville try to change the subject after the incident, instead of him and Harry trying to explain things to Hermione?

I don't know about this one. You started out so well, but now...
Guest chapter 4 . 7/12/2016
Does Hermione not find it strange that she can't take the bracelet off? And why hasn't she questioned where Harry is, seeing as he always spends some of his holiday at the Burrow? I also find it strange that Hermione would put the bracelet on on the first place, seeing as you don't mention who sent the package.

I would say something about her ignoring the fact that Harry told her his father was alive, but I'm assuming that's due to the bracelet's influence.

Your sentences are getting short and choppy again, I hope you don't end up reverting back to the style of the original story.
Guest chapter 2 . 7/12/2016
Why would he go back up to his room? I would have stayed down there and questioned the person claiming to be my - supposedly dead - father.
Guest chapter 1 . 7/12/2016
Much better! I just finished reading the first chapter of the original story, and I have to be honest and say it was horrible.

You have given us a back story to what happened, and how Sirius could just leave everyone that night. You have also improved the grammar and sentence structure- well done!

You have made this something worth reading. I hope you are able to complete it.
Guest chapter 7 . 9/12/2015
Northwind Tweak chapter 11 . 9/11/2015
i like the remake so far keep it up
Guest chapter 11 . 9/10/2015
Chapter 10 and chapter 11 are the same.
Guest chapter 5 . 8/31/2015
They turn up in the middle of the night, Harry doesn't ask why? Hermione was attacked they don't check she is now ok?
Guest chapter 4 . 8/31/2015
Mum not mom, knife chore thing I didn't get,? It was the middle of the night?
mikanMD chapter 7 . 8/30/2015
And she lost her powers just like that?
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