|Reviews for L'Effetto Magico|
| Lanhua chapter 1 . 2/8/2014
Another interesting idea ruined by hastiness. Specifically, the dialogue. And some of the stuff it's too convoluted.
What I liked: The eezo-entropy thing, humans being overly emotional and trying to alert other governemnets against eezo-peril (in character with both series!), human governments aware of Puellae Magi (t makes sense, as technology advances they are going to be aware that there are some little girls that should have been dead by now but are still alive, even if the Incubators refuse to allow them in on the details). In general, your ideas
What I didn't like: Shepard. Good, god, the Earth background would have made more sense since Incubators only approach pre-adolescent girls (I imagine, after a gang war, "I wish to have a decent living where I can help people and kill bad guys!" Cue at some point being noticed and fast-tracked into the Alliance Navy. The dialogues, unnecessarily convoluted, just like Shepard's situation and project Rogue thingy and that the fic feels too rushed.
| edboy4926 chapter 1 . 9/5/2013
Looking forward to more.
| bobbo chapter 1 . 12/28/2012
"A good answer. Magi scans don't work well with Mass Effect fields as the two are direct opposites of each other mostly due to the way that Eezo attracts Entropy making such scans blurry or otherwise useless while the object being scanned damaged or destroyed depending on the amount of contained Eezo."
Ah, I guess Eezo acts as an entropic capacitor.
| mistakenot chapter 1 . 10/26/2012
A ME/PMMM crossover? Based on "To the Stars"?! Speechlessly awesome!
I see some rough edges, but the concept is great. As lilmagi pointed out, it looks like you've not completely processed your own decision to change Joker into a MG, seeing as some of her pronouns are off.
Also, I wouldn't call the Batarians a "former member of the council", unless you've changed things so that the Batarians actually sat on the Council. Calling them a former member of the *Citadel* makes more sense.
I'm curious to see how you tie the Reapers, Incubators, and the Goddess into this new universe. Good luck with the story!
| lilmagi chapter 1 . 10/25/2012
Interesting concept you have here. Makes me curious how did you blend magic and technology, as even in current TtS that isnt being done.
One thing tho, I find it weird you changed Joker into a woman, tho not unpleasant thing. It just needs a bit to get used to. Which apparently you need to, as you made several mistakes on referring to Joker as a "he".
"Joker looked at him quickly, annoyance clearly on HIS face"
"Joker replied professionally though a few traces of HIS dry humor was present as well"
Why isn't Shepard aging herself to at least over 20? From my understanding, MG in postion of command usually do that (like Mami did in TtS). Or did people just got used to, to what looks like, young girls commanding grown man?
Oh, one last thing. From your prophecy thing at the end.
"Oriko and Kirika were the wings that carried the Mitakihara Four into battle."
Arent Oriko and Kirika dead? They died long time ago (in TtS timeline wise).
| Inverness chapter 1 . 10/22/2012
Wow, I'm quite surprised to see a continuation of To the Stars. It's nice to see someone else enjoys it enough to even do that. I'm liking what you've done so far. I don't really like how mass effect technology seems to conflict with magic and such, but I guess you have to even the playing field somehow. Though the reapers being crushed by forces infinitely their greater would be delicious. I would like to know if the Incubators are still around too.
Anyhow, hope to see more soon.
| theBSDude chapter 1 . 10/20/2012
Goddammit, you made Ashley a distributed AI; I was gonna do that.
Anyway, this looks super fucking interesting. Bravo.