|Reviews for Marionette: A Plea for Requiem|
| MessengerOfDreams chapter 1 . 11/23/2012
Now, stories like these, epic, in-depth reimaginings of stories, time lines, et al, have always been a favorite of mine. This story is promising from the start, with what I see, as a non-fan, as a highly interesting, unusual concept. Being a non-fan, I am of course faced with the drawbacks of not fully understanding the universe of the story, so I thank you for clarifying things for me as I go.
Your descriptions are nice, sparse but defining well enough. It's easy for my mind to run wild and fill in the blanks. Your writing is also on nearly a professional grade- despite a few missing commas and some trouble with pov switching that threw me off throughout, it was well-written with experienced prose I'd expect from a published author. The dialogue doesn't feel forced, and in fact rolls naturally which is nothing short of a godsend in any fanfic in general.
Your leading characters are defined well and are already engaging. I enjoy the subtle contrast between high-strung Akira and subdued Taiki, and how you established a relationship between the two easily enough. They're both very natural characters and their interactions reflect this, so I commend you for that.
I thin you've done a splendid job here, and I'll be adding this to the WIPs archive since this is the first chapter of an epic. I look forward to seeing where you take this!
| Sgt Rypht chapter 1 . 11/1/2012
This was TOTALLY worth the wait. When I saw this concept on your profile, I was wondering where you were going to go with it. So, I waited. Now, I’m so happy that I did because this was absolutely wonderful.
To be honest, I didn’t expect it to start off like this. Your narration flowed a lot better than most of your stories. There were equal amounts of dialogue and good crisp narrative angle for the story to be rather fulfilling. There were a few times where the sentences seemed a bit oddly placed, but I could understandably see why there were there. As such, there were places where semicolon and colons weren’t exactly needed. However, I’m not going to harp on that because I’m not one to talk.
The thing that hooked me a lot with this story is the characters and the concept. I’m a sucker for unique spins on characters and even more so on ideas. Marionette seemed to start off on a way that I don’t think people are used to in Digimon. It seemed to just have this dark connotation to it, lingering in the background. This should be teeming with views, in my opinion. The characters are so fleshed out and the story seems to be going in such a way that is enjoyable for people that aren’t even huge Digimon fans.
My favorite line in the chapter has to be Taiki’s: "-Let's open the door to summertime,-" he smiled, peals ringing in each note. "-Because there's someone waiting up ahead.-"
For me, I think that showed the overall tone of the story. From that moment, I realized that this story isn’t going to be the Digimon story that we all know and love.
For me, Akari’s character is a lot more enjoyable than the show. Not to say that I didn’t like her in the show, I just usually preferred the other members of the cast more. However, I feel like she has depth here. I will be interested to see how she grows because her Ascension seems to be a good character motivator.
Speaking of Ascensions, Taiki’s Nocturne was explained really well. I feel like that was just the tip of the iceberg though. It was like you were trying to hold back the entire feeling of Nocturne for the rest of the story. I appreciate that effort. We didn’t get to feel the entire extent of the musical hypnotism (could I call it that, hm? It seems a bit flat for the potential of the power), but we got to see enough to make us note it mentally. I’ll say enough to make us a bit afraid.
As for the length, this was a great length. Not a lot of people are used to reading fan fictions with a lot of words. I wish there were more that would take the time to read some of the longer, more novel-like pieces. It would definitely be worth the effort. I know as you get close to the climax of each individual book that the chapters will get longer. I’ll advise if it gets too long, try to split it up into different parts. I don’t think the readers would mind if you chopped up some of the potentially longer chapters (then it will be less intimidating for people).
I hope that this review showed how much I really loved the chapter and the story start. Keep it up!