|Reviews for Salvage|
| Mal chapter 36 . 4/26
oh damn, am I glad you're back. This was a great chapter. We really got to know the child even more in this chapter. Its possible you eluded to this before, but really spelling out how it kills only when a person was ment to die, is... oddly, reassuring in a messed up sort of way. So thanks for that.
The child lived up to its "name" sake in part of this. Heh. fighting like trew siblings. I'm enjoying where this is going or where I think its going. ;)
I've not plaied any games this new part of the story is set in, but i'm happy to report that I am not lost. Speaking of reporters... Loved the child playing the bright-eyed reporter bit. Made me smile. Loved that it was genuanly interested and asked a few questions of its own.
Beautiful writing, as always. Thanks lots for continuing your story!
| Keleri chapter 36 . 4/13
[They gave their broken pokémon away to trainers, to normal*]
Lost the italics here.
["Absol, he's still doing it," you say, and she turns to calmly look at Mewtwo instead.]
IF YOU KIDS DON'T STOP THIS RIGHT NOW I WILL TURN THIS FANFIC AROUND
[ranting about how unfair his life was and everything he'd do to the people responsible if he only got the chance.]
loooooool best terrifying mistake of science
[That's the kind of thing I have to say to get money," he adds a bit sheepishly.]
Yay Orre! I love your descriptions of Cipher's base, they're very evocative and Mewtwo's tantruming through the empty halls is super unnerving. I'm not sure how good objectively the Orre games really were but something about that Used Future setting was incredibly compelling and I'm very curious to see Mewtwo and Mewzero explore the region. Loving the details about infinity energy and what exactly shadow pokemon are/were.
| Ashora chapter 36 . 3/15
This reminds me of me and my brother when we were growing up. I love the dynamic of the family.
| Keleri chapter 35 . 1/2
""Or, like, can't you get it off the fucking cloud?" The great Nathaniel Morgan waves his fork vaguely. "Like, break into some fucking government computer and have your fucking botnets hack all the passwords with their, with their RAM and stuff. And then it's all, like, in the cloud, right?""
yeah, why can't you get it off the cloud, LK?
"It's weird, the child thinks as it sits eating the great Nathaniel Morgan's portion of lasagna off the floor."
good good terrible trash child
"his Raticate's got who knows what kind of issues"
lowercase raticate here
Child-Nate bonding! Oh man, the Mewtwo files are terrifying. This is the best.
"Most pokémon have evolved ways to infer what others think, to mirror their actions and model their emotional states. Psychic-types, on the other hand, require an absolute sense of self in order to remain distinct individuals amidst the foreign minds that brush against their own. Despite experiencing others' thoughts and feelings, they must recognize them as outside themselves rather than share in them. In a psychic's mind, the separation between "self" and "other" is absolute. More than any other kind of pokémon, then, psychics are naturally inclined towards the task of killing without remorse."
oh shit, I love this
"Over time, people and pokémon routinely exposed to a psychic's mental field will "learn" to think more like the psychic, and this effect is more pronounced the more powerful the psychic in question is. The Mewtwo project sought to create a psychic of unprecedented power, but its executors failed to consider that they would also be creating a pokémon with unprecedented ability to influence its handlers."
Amazing update! The Orre games have stuck in my mind as something Different from the franchise and it'll be neat to see your take on them. Poor child, flinging itself into destruction and danger on such thin evidence. :') Go get 'em, you lil shithead.
| Mal chapter 35 . 12/13/2017
Oh shiiiiiit... oh that child... wow. now I seriously wanna know what was on the computer! :( I'll miss Nate
| jackallascarian chapter 5 . 12/11/2017
Looks like I wasn’t logged in for my last review .’ Whoops!
I really do like the way the character of the child and the characters of the people it impersonates are separated! It looks like it should be confusing, but I don’t have any trouble understanding which version is being described.
From the sounds of it, Matt committed suicide of his own accord, then the child took over as him? I had wondered if the child was involved in the suicide, but so far it seems like it wasn’t.
I also am wondering if the child truly believes that it is the people it impersonates, or if it’s just another way to help ‘stay in character’?
The growlithe’s name is Gruff… I’m love him…
“You lean forward a bit and drape your arms over Leonard Kerrigan’s shoulders and wait…” Yes… that’s how hugs work...
It’s interesting to see the child’s anger at Leonard dipping into his little story. It’s easy to see the child as just… a child imitating some spy movie on T.V., but still getting caught up in its own feelings. I don’t really understand if this is what the child rehearsed, or if it still forgot all of its lines like it said earlier?
Is Pikablu that fake raichu evolution thing? I vaguely remember hearing it a long time ago, so I had to look it up. It’s an interesting detail to add.
I feel bad for Leonard. Like… he’s just a dad trying his best. I kind of wanted him to trap the child and get real answers about Matt. But I also want to see the child’s whole plan… so…
“You’ve made a careful study of Matt Kerrigan…” I believe this, but it’s kinda hard to accept when the child couldn’t make it all the way through the newspaper.
“You wonder whether anyone even bothered to explain to him what happened before putting him away.” Interesting observation from the non-human side of things. When trainers die in fics, I always wonder if anyone talks to the pokémon or gives them the chance to mourn. Leaving them in the P.C. forever, like in stasis, is a huge ethical issue. But if they loved their trainer, it might be kinder.
“You sound like a fucking robot.” eXACTLY! When I was reading the child’s dialogue, I was thinking ‘what kind of human speaks like this?’
The child held five pokéballs in one hand?! I struggle with like… one apple.
So the child has War, but what about the other five pokéballs? (four? Was Duke the Persian left behind?) I hope the child just gave them to a pokécentre, or something else non-malicious.
Ah, okay. So when Absol says ‘Fate’ it’s really the child’s translation of something she has said in not-English? That’s really interesting.
“It is like the way shadows bend when they flow over blood?” Wow, does Absol have any more sayings from, like, Hot Topic?
I’m still not over the fact that it’s been TWO YEARS and the child is only now making this progress?!
Eight badges in a month? I think that’ll be a record!
Looking forward to the next murder! And I loved the description of the eruption on Cinnabar!
| Ashora chapter 35 . 12/8/2017
I feel so bad for Nate in this chapter. Dude can't catch a break.
| Coatl chapter 35 . 12/7/2017
Hoo boy, this chapter was a doozy.
I was actually laughing really hard at Nate and the child's ideas of "hacking". And I can't believe I didn't pick up that Nate was illiterate either! No wonder he wasn't digging through the pokédex info on his opponents. He couldn't make heads or tails of it!
My favorite scene out of the last couple of chapters was definitely the one where the child is going through all of the computer's files. You wouldn't think it would be very interesting to read about someone reading about someone who's also explaining someone else, but Mewtwo creepily staring into the camera, fascinating explanations of why they picked a psychic pokémon, the bittersweet footnotes from the child's past... I'm legitimately upset that the computer got squashed by Graveler, because that means we probably won't get any more of the firsthand details of the Mewtwo Project. Hell, I wish I could go through all of the files *myself*.
It was also great to see the dynamic between Leonard, Nathaniel and the child. I knew the child was pretty moody, but then it fluctuated pretty fast between grudging respect and murderous rage. That house is going to be in shambles before it knows it.
The plot is finally rolling along like Graveler down a mountain, and I can't wait to see what happens next.
| nihile chapter 35 . 12/7/2017
Also also, I realized I probably should've sent that review with my actual account :P
| Indiscretion chapter 35 . 12/7/2017
Yo! It's been a while!
[they were for Rats and Mightyena he went and ate them anyway.]
Should be Raticate and Mightyena, I got my hopes up for a second there :(.
[She asked me to help with that, so we've been practicing on stuff in the jungle.]
Oh god seeing as I've just been reading Farla's Another Verse, I'm really hoping this won't turn out to be more, sentient creature eats another sentient creature.
[No. They might disagree for their own reasons. Then they'd just be wrong.]
[So you would never, say, keep one of them confined to their pokéball if they didn't do what you want—]
["The fuck is a turnip?"]
Huh, I guess they really don't live anywhere temperate/cold in Kanto. Or have many imports from Sinnoh, for that matter.
["But it was only $19.95!" the child says. "And the turnip thing was free!" It looks around, almost wistful. It really has forgotten half the cool stuff in here. "Absol says I am not allowed to buy more things off TV, though. One time she came through here and a stack of stuff fell on her. She did not get hurt, but it made her fur go all poofy."]
Oh my god, are they actually delivering to random island in the middle of nowhere? That's hilarious.
["Or, like, can't you get it off the fucking cloud?" The great Nathaniel Morgan waves his fork vaguely. "Like, break into some fucking government computer and have your fucking botnets hack all the passwords with their, with their RAM and stuff. And then it's all, like, in the cloud, right?"]
Hey Nate, don't you want a secure computer? I have some great free RAM you can download...
["'Course I do! They work by electricity! Duh!" the great Nathaniel Morgan says, smug. "I ain't fucking stupid."]
This sounds more like something the child would say than Nate. This is really nitpicky, but works-by-electricity and botnets/cloud/RAM are things on different enough abstraction levels that I think people could tell between, because they know they're sounding petulant otherwise.
["No, no, it's just..." Leonard Kerrigan chuckles. "You won't eat vegetables, really? What are you, five years old?"]
Yeah, seriously, wow. Nate was not the character I was focusing on these past few chapters, but how much did I miss? Was he always this,,, childish, rebellious?
Not really what I expected out of Kerrigan, either, to taunt and fistfight somebody, but the last time I saw him was even farther back. I guess I'm surprised he didn't come out with more damage from the whole being kidnapped and hack-or-you-die thing.
[Most pokémon have evolved ways to infer what others think, to mirror their actions and model their emotional states. Psychic-types, on the other hand, require an absolute sense of self in order to remain distinct individuals amidst the foreign minds that brush against their own. Despite experiencing others' thoughts and feelings, they must recognize them as outside themselves rather than share in them. In a psychic's mind, the separation between "self" and "other" is absolute. More than any other kind of pokémon, then, psychics are naturally inclined towards the task of killing without remorse.]
Hmmm. My question is why it'd be better to create something that would kill without feeling about it, rather than to make something that would simply obey. Like making a death weapon instead of an evil minion.
The pop psychologyish aspect of knowing-how-an-entire-niche-thinks really fits though! I can't really explain it, but when a government wants something done rigorous data isn't really at the forefront.
[holding a bucket of blocks out in front of her]
[and Rubick's cubes]
[This led to impaired decision-making on the part of project staff, panic, madness, and would ultimately precipitate the project's tragic end.]
Well that's horrible and sounds like it came out before the researchers on it fully worked out what was going on. More points to pop psychology being how they made decisions, yeah!
I really miss the child's team. It sounds like Orre's the next arc, but if this is the end of Leonard and the child's relationship with Nate hasn't really changed, then this feels much more like its jumping from on action plot than the next than anything.
[Sadness rises up in the child so suddenly it almost chokes, and it crouches down by the ruined computer, staring hopelessly into its busted metal and wiring. What happened? It didn't mean to hurt anybody, but it was just angry—they made it so angry, they should have left it alone, it told them to leave it alone. But now it's just the child in the big old house, alone with the sound of the waves and the ruined computer and maybe Absol out there doing who knows what.]
It's good that it's thinking about stuff though.
Also, Kelind's a cool name!
| Sevrius chapter 2 . 12/3/2017
I recently poked my head back into the Pokemon fandom after years of hiatus and happened to stumble across this story. As of the first few chapters, I'm very confused, but also intrigued at where this is going.
PS - Clouded Skies was one of my favorite fanfics, back in the day. Glad to see that you're still writing!
| Keleri chapter 34 . 11/29/2017
""You okay?" The great Nathaniel Morgan asks"
there are a few places where the "The" is capitalized after dialogue where it shouldn't be.
"an overflowing bowl of Sugar Rowlets"
THE SUPERB OWL BOWL
""It's not the same for humans. You don't battle. But for pokémon, being strong is everything. If you want anyone to take you seriously, if you want to live somewhere nice, if you even want to eat, sometimes, you have to be able to fight, and you have to be able to win. So if I can't, what good am I?""
Great worldbuilding here explaining pokemon motivations and great job making me ugly-cry about Nate and his pokeys
""But I don't want a metagross!" The great Nathaniel Morgan says, an edge of hysteria in his voice. "Only rich assholes use those!""
(HYENA LAUGHTER) YES
"Raticate hangs in the great Nathaniel Morgan's arms, ignoring his trainer's stroking. "It's nice of you to say that, Nate, but this is how it is. Pokémon battle. It's what we're for. And if you're not good at battling, then you're not a very good pokémon, either.""
Oh hooooo, now this is interesting. That's the pokétriarchy talking, Raticate! Throw off your shackles!
"The great Nathaniel Morgan waves the words away. "Yeah, yeah, they say.""
Yessssssss I love the aura cancer development and the mystery around Red. Mewtwo can't feel you coming if you don't have a mind, right? Hoo hoo hoo
| Mal chapter 34 . 11/16/2017
yay! happy birthday to the best dark pokéfic. i enjoyed this chapter, from the playful banter near the end, to the dark hole between the childs hands (killer immage, btw,) to the chat between trainer and his faithful rat. Sooooo darn good. I was crossing my fingers that Nate wouldn't leave just yet. i love these two. Although, you slipped into second person a few times and that confused me. That might be a me thing, though...
Either way, squeeees from me.
I found that I liked the child when it was the trainer, but I really formed a bond with it when it was a pokemon. So while I'm happy that it might be able to get its teem back soon, I kinda miss it being a pokemon. lol weird i know, but true.
| Guest chapter 4 . 10/17/2017
“Your friends rest exhausted in the pokéballs at your waist…" I’d love some context for this, even if it’s just ‘from training/travelling’. During this scene I kept wondering about what it was that the pokémon had been doing, rather than concentrating on what the child is saying. Loved the detail about the corpse though.
I like the way you give out detail without being too exposition-y. It’s vague enough for me to theorize, but not enough to be frustrating.
So the implication is that Cinnabar was an actual, near-thriving town before the Mewtwo project? Then afterwards most everyone left? And now it’s been built back up again and turned into a resort-style place?
“Nearly blew your cover in the most dramatic way possible…” I struggle to believe that the child does anything un-dramatically.
“It’s all you have!” So, the pokédex is more important to the child than its friends?
“Don’t worry, I can pay for that.” Very reassuring.
“It doesn’t say it wants to see the look on the man’s face when he realizes what’s going on, realizes that he really has lost everything and there’s nothing he can do about it.” Yessssssssss revengggggggge.
At the risk of sounding like a cannibal, what’s so wrong with the child eating a dead human, if it’s only a bit? I can’t really see any reasons, and it seems out of place for Absol. Is it a personal choice?
I really liked what Absol said about having to find the bodies! The way she speaks about Fate sounds religious, like someone deeply, respectfully worshipping their god. But what if the child waited, and killed humans in places where the body wouldn’t be found, like if it got carried out to sea? And if wild pokémon eat the body until there’s nothing left, what’s the difference between that and the child eating it?
I wonder if there’s a personal reason while Absol spends so much time with the child, is so involved with its cause. Is it something to do with her beliefs about Fate? Or is it for Mew?
“We’re not discriminating against undead trainers either.” Man, I’d love to see that story. Reminds me of that pokémon fic, ‘No Antidote’. All sorts of fascinating moral issues there.
The bit about the child calling Fitzwallace a liar was interesting. I can’t come up with any reasons why the League would have any particular influence on the child’s background, but it sounds like a delicious conspiracy.
Ooh, the bit about the blood is interesting. Would there even be a result? It might suggest the blood is pokémon blood or something, but I wonder how detailed they can get from that when it’s pretty obvious that the child is… something else.
It’s been years?! Man, does the child really expect everything to be the same? Anything could have happened in years.
“And those who practice vengeance will only see it visited on themselves.” Watch me catch this gnarly wave of ‘I don’t care’, Absol, I’m heading straight down Comeuppance Boulevard to punch that vending machine for eating my coins.
“You are not human.” Nice. I like that, although Absol is clearly very intelligent and has a lot of insight that we and the child do not, she still discusses things, and occasionally changes her mind. I think it makes her more realistic.
I’ve just thought about this, but where did the house come from? Did they build it, or was it always there? I vaguely recall it being on an island.
Oooh, Leonard’s son? I sort of remember this. I wonder if the ‘suicide’ was the real Matt Kerrigan, or the child?
Interesting chapter! I missed Titan tho [
| Mal chapter 33 . 10/11/2017
oh my goodness. What a jam packed chapter! Loved it. Really like your fight scenes. You don't focus too long on any one thing. Even when there are seemingly countless pokemon all fighting the child, I don't get lost or bogged down. I really liked how it kept focusing on the great Nathaniel Morgan. Child would be fighting and trying to get away, but nope, its eye kept being drawn back to its "friend." ;) As much as it would like to pretend otherwise, it likes Nate.
God...but damn is your writing beautiful. I rather enjoied the blue scene. such a wonderful immage.