|Reviews for The Marriage Flaw|
| riskeybusiness chapter 18 . 2/10
Really enjoyed it! Don't think you dragged it out at all, if anything it was rushed at the end. Thanks for sharing :)
| Guest chapter 18 . 10/17/2014
| RiverWoman1 chapter 18 . 10/3/2014
Lovely ending. And don't stop writing. I know with two young 'uns it's difficult - (been there, done that got the tee) - you have a talent for this ship (your vids also prove it) and I would love to read more of your Snanger stories.
Anyhow - thanks for writing this (and Gilded Love).
See you around the boards and YouTube.
| RiverWoman1 chapter 16 . 10/3/2014
Y'know what? I think this works much better without the smutty sex. Personally, I think it would have been wrong to have dived straight into their first intimate moment: it actually makes the reader (by that I mean me) use their imagination. Was it great sex or was is just OK? Did the earth move or was it simply maahh?
You bring out Severus's softer side slowly, which is good; after all, he is a man who has had to learn to hide his feelings from an early age so he can't suddenly become all mushy.
I haven't read the 'flaming comments'(I'm still finding my way around the site) - which I always think are cowardly anyway - and believe me, I know what it's like. I have been flamed by more people, 'so called readers', because they don't like how I write a character or I'm not following strict canon. I believe these people just don't 'get' fanfic in any of its forms; whether as a written story or on video.
Keep doing what you are doing; write what you need to write and if readers don't like it - there are plenty of other stories out there they can find!
| RiverWoman1 chapter 12 . 10/2/2014
I like your Ginny!
| RiverWoman1 chapter 6 . 10/2/2014
Oh I love Hermione when she is forceful - and she has a plan, bravo (I think!)
| RiverWoman1 chapter 4 . 10/2/2014
I didn't have a problem with accent and my Da was a Scot!
From the date at the top, I guess you now have a toddler! Hope it all went well.
| RiverWoman1 chapter 2 . 10/2/2014
Great opening chapters - you are setting things up nicely. Can't for the life of me fathom where this could be going though; guess I will have to read on!
| Writtenaspr chapter 1 . 9/30/2014
I am enjoying reading this warm and gentle story.
Just a slight sound, hmmmm, in the beginning of the next chapter:
Isn't the past tense of 'to tread' 'trod', instead of 'treaded' ? Or am I old-fashioned?
Sorry, I just blinked, and fell out of 'story- time', for a short moment;
Reading on with delight.
| Guest chapter 18 . 6/20/2014
Good story, well written. I know you felt you dragged it out but I thought the last chapter could he been two and more details, much like the first.
| Cysteine Snape chapter 18 . 1/27/2014
I nearly expected the poor man to be dead at the end. But then again, I don't Always believe in "happily ever after".
Loved the ending, and look forward to your next story!
| Cysteine Snape chapter 5 . 1/27/2014
I'm loving this so far, and I'm surprised why Hermione didn't just shatter his cane or punch him in the nose yet in this fic. He pretty much deserves it.
Seriously loving this story, though. And I love pretty much everything you've done on youtube.
| Guest chapter 18 . 12/18/2013
Awful ending. Totally rushed and unrealistic. And you seem to have made up a new maiden name for Severus "the half-blood PRINCE" Snape's mother. (The clue is in the name or didn't you read the books?)
Your writing isn't bad but you need to do more planning, and get a beta please who can challenge your ideas and keep them on the straight and narrow. Anyone can spell and grammar check but there's more to a beta than that.
| Guest chapter 18 . 12/10/2013
I enjoyed this story and you're a pretty good writer. But parts of this story seemed kind of rushed and impractical (especially the end) and ending up ruining an otherwise great story. And honestly, what kind of Harry Potter fan doesn't know that Severus's mother's maiden name was Prince? This is a really confusing story...not in that the plot was hard to follow, it was just really uneven and sort of all over the place. It could have been much better and more enjoyable. Maybe don't rush parts of it so much next time and I'd recommend getting a beta.
| Guest chapter 18 . 12/10/2013
this last chapter was pretty bad, very rushed and chaotic...