|Reviews for Ascent II (Sequel to Ascent I)|
| Hamm Sammich chapter 55 . 1/19/2013
I'm not saying you would have had to come up with a gender neutral way of saying it. "Husband and wife" would have done just fine. The "man and wife" line from the Miles/Keiko wedding bothers me too, but at least I can kind of blame that on the fact that the show was written 25 years ago. I can't do that with your stories unfortunately, and using the excuse that it's canon doesn't really wash with me when it comes to such a small non-plot relevant detail. The canon itself is far from perfect, and I don't see how adhering so strictly to the contradictions and bad examples it sets makes for a stronger story. In my opinion it actually makes it weaker. I'd think that keeping with the spirit of an enlightened, egalitarian future would be more important than following canon down to the letter. It just strikes me as missing the forest for the trees.
I thought Ascent I was good. Not great, but a fun way to spend a couple afternoons. But the more I read of your work the more the little things like this bother me. I kind of had to force myself to finish part two here, and I don't honestly know if I'll bother to read part three when you get around to posting it. Chalk it up to personal taste I guess.
| Lydia Gastrell chapter 55 . 1/18/2013
A note on the wedding scene. I searched for ST Canon examples of human weddings. The only one I found was the marriage of Chief O'Brien and his wife. During the ceremony, Picard does say "Man and wife". So, I decided to go ahead with that instead of trying to make up some gender neutral 24th century version that no one would recognize. ;) -LG
| Melanie Scott chapter 1 . 1/18/2013
Oh come on guys...this story was freaking awesome. Fantastic ending :D you are an incredible writer, especially in something like fanfic, where it can be so difficult to continue at times. Kudos! I am completely addicted to this story and can't wait for more. I'm sad for more character torture...but that's what makes it so good! The tension. And Bee missing! Ready your phasers, we're going in! We're coming Bee! And on a more pleadingnote...PLEASE don't kill Data again. That's just too much... keep him in Maddox's lab for a while if you will, but PLEASE don't kill him. That is all :)
| Hamm Sammich chapter 55 . 1/18/2013
"man and wife"? Considering that a lot of people in the here and now consider that phrase outdated at best and pretty dang offensive at worst, I highly doubt it would still be in use in the 23rd century.
You're not a bad writer by any means and obviously have a talent for long, engaging stories, but it's little details like that that keep me from truly enjoying your work, despite how much I want and try to. Maybe I'm just too much of a damn liberal.
| Lina chapter 55 . 1/18/2013
You are a fantastic writer. I hope to see more from you. I do sort of wish the initial story with Teni had have continued into a new love interest and separate story line though, rather than rehashing the whole Anna thing - which was good in its own time, but feels a bit drawn out as you get past the mid-half of the story, at which point I sort of realized I was skipping a lot of dialogue because I had become attached to the Teni story line and had almost no interest in Anna's return to the picture.
I dislike how Teni was turned into this bubbly little annoyance at her re-appearance in the storyline. I liked her character in the beginning.
| Daniel Balding chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
Okay, I have read both parts and all I have to say is this: Hurry up with part 3 please! I love this story, it is so well written. It's a wonderful story and continuation of Lore's story
| Cheap Trixie chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
Aww! I can't wait for part 3!
| Kharlan Hero chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
Nice ending. The whole wedding was fun to read. I especially liked Lore's speech.
Also, very good story in general.
Bee is missing? Oh no!
I am looking forward to part III, whenever you are able to start it. :)
| Kharlan Hero chapter 54 . 1/17/2013
Poor Bee, having both his brothers telling him to do different things. And it must have been scary when Data took over. But it was necessary, and knowing Bee, he'll be back to his usual cheerful self in no time at all. Especially since he's probably ecstatic that Lore is back and will help Data.
"You have always been arrogant and reactionary."
The first thing Data says directly to Lore since he 'died.' Much more believable than if he had said something about missing Lore. And Lore should feel special, he's the first one Data really talked to. Of course, that was just because Lore doesn't listen very well, at all, and Data needed to get his attention. Oh well.
Almost nothing surprises Lore, at least not enough to get much of a reaction, except the idea that people would help him.
Anna's family showed up again. :)
"He had known this was going to be rough, but he had hardly expected to actually be terrified."
I guess that's what happens when you face Katherine Hall's wrath.
Lore found his purpose, good for him. And Data's even on the list.
Things are finally looking up.
...At least until the sequel. *looks at you hopefully*
...Now I feel bad for basically wishing more bad stuff on Lore, Anna, and the rest. *sigh* haha
Did anyone actually bring up the fact that Bee is in danger because of Maddox?
| Guest chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
just wow. thank you for being such a dedicated and talented storyteller! reading this is always a highlight of my day, and i was sad to think it would be over soon, so i am beyond thrilled that there will be a part 3!
and i have to say, the part where Data comes forward in the cargo bay to talk some sense into Lore - epic scene! I will be eagerly awaiting your next installment. And congrats on this one :)
| nathasa39 chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
ha sido un fic muy interesante desde el principio hasta el final, espero con impaciencia por su continuación en la siguiente secuela. buen trabajo.
| nathasa39 chapter 54 . 1/17/2013
gran capitulo, buen paso para Lore y Anna.
| Suizokukan chapter 55 . 1/17/2013
Oh my God, I am so so so so soooooo happy! A happy ending, Lore could finally return and be together with B-4 and Anna. Annabelle Grace Hall even. I wondered if we would ever find out what the G. stood for. I'm glad we finally did!
And they all know about Data now and want to help him. Good thing that Data took over B-4 and talked some sense into Lore. B-4 means well, but he's apparently not the best person to speak up. And when he made Margaret cry. Ha ha. Oh, the irony. Bee is the nice, kind, caring person who would never do anything mean, yet he's making children cry, while Lore is getting along with them :)
Oh, and Lore getting along with the family and being a part of it is great. I love how he's teasing Katherine. Replicator bullying, ha ha. Awesome! But the best thing must be that Katherine actually know how to scare Lore ;)
I am surprised that Louise and Trevor got married, especially so soon. I mean, it was just a few months ago since Louise went, "Ew, gross!" as soon as Trevor was mentioned, but I guess there is something in the saying that love is born from hate. The wedding was nice :) At first I thought it was Lore's and Anna's and I was about to scold you for not letting us see the proposal. Then I thought, "Nah, it can't be" and thought it was Blake and Teni who got married. But no, it was Louise and Trevor and hence the surprise :)
Hey. Is Lore going to propose to Anna?
I'm glad there will be a third part. I mean... B-4! I will keep reminding you to not hurt him until the third story has a happy ending as well. It's enough that you already made him cry. *feels like a harassing gangster* And Anna still haven't figured out what her third demand to Lore should be. And I agree, Data needs his own story. And Maddox needs to be punished.
One thing I've been curious at (how unusual!) is, isn't it hard to write about androids? I mean, there are a lot of technical terms and functions and parts and unknown things. Do you study canon for information on terms and stuff or do you just make it up as you go? Whichever it is, it's well done :)
I'm also happy to hear that you don't get bored with the stories :) Yes, following stories that just stop in the middle, no matter how great and well written it is and on the surface thought through, is too common, unfortunately. I've been guilty to that once or twice myself, which is one reason I don't write anymore, because I can never figure everything out. I don't know how you do it. I can never build a story around an actual idea and I'm impressed with those who can.
What can I say? I'm glad there was a happy ending - besides this hateful cliffhanger. I loved this story, despite accusing you of too much torture and I will look forward to another story and more accusations :)
| Melanie Scott chapter 3 . 1/16/2013
Okay...it has been three whole days since an update and I'm getting antsy.
| Guest chapter 53 . 1/16/2013
what's going to happen?!