|Reviews for Legacy Of Fire|
| trninjakiller chapter 7 . 3/28
Dude 2 here the hell did this spectre job come from. I thought he was retired.
| Geezuz chapter 14 . 2/20
the councilors are such dicks but amazing stories hope you will continue
| Yentroc chapter 14 . 10/19/2014
Good story, simply adorable.
| M4ss3ff3ctf4n chapter 18 . 10/12/2014
Good story. Need a little more on Ria's life though
| Lady Amiee chapter 16 . 4/22/2014
Decided to review this one, as I really enjoyed it. You write action so well, Bowser. I actually thought it was real combat, which I think is amazing. I didn't know it was the arena, it's brilliant. I love the difference in the two's battle strat, both using Shepards words and advise, but taking it in such different ways.
The vivid scene came across so well, I love it. The geth screaming in Grunt's face made me get goosebumps, it's fracking brilliant, babe. Nice work!
| 570K4 chapter 5 . 4/1/2014
Ah, the party aftermath.
I am a sucker for details, so I loved this chapter. It is only natural for Quarians to have strong feelings about their suits, and it is interesting to see Tali and Ria interact in that context, as Ria doesn't know the history behind it.
Ria, is adorable as always, no complaints there. The hunt for Saren makes for an unusual bedtime story, and I am glad that explaining things to Ria didn't happen off stage.
Shepard was funny, with what and falling asleep on the couch. I've been there, I know how that is, very nicely done.
Anyway, no grammar, punctuation, spelling, or structure errors of any kind. No possible improvements of any kind as far as I'm concerned. This story gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling, and I can't wait for more.
| Full-Paragon chapter 1 . 3/8/2014
I read the original Wings of Fire some time ago, but this was pretty easy to pick up again. It's still got the same level of warm fuzzies (MAXIMUM!) which is nice and refreshing. The problem with that though is that sometimes things are too easy and nice. It would have been interesting to see John and Tali hash things out a little more, spending more time on what parent hood would mean for the two most famous people on Rannoch (and in the top ten for the whole galaxy) and what that might do to any prospective children. Haggling over the species of their child(ren) would have been interesting as well, or whether having Tali be artificially inseminated would be preferable. Still, it's a heartwarming chapter, so maybe those things would have detracted from the tone you're obviously trying to set.
| Joryn282 chapter 4 . 3/3/2014
This chapter was good, if a bit long. Nice to see all the old folks from the game. I'd certainly like to think they all meet up every once in a while to recount old times and catch up on the new. And of course Wrex and Grunt start a drinking contest. That just seems natural. Garrus' prank went a little over my head though. Was the prank that he didn't tell them the party was happening?
Anyway, I enjoyed reading the chapter. About the only thing that caught my eye was in the paragraph about "The Veils Light" you used the words "had been" a lot for just one paragraph. Try changing it up again, maybe using were or rephrasing in such a way where you don't have to use either. Other than that, good job.
| 570K4 chapter 4 . 2/10/2014
Awesome chapter. If anyone loves a nice fluffy reunion party, it's me.
All the characters were very well written, though I am a little sad Joker and EDI didn't do much. Also, where was Bakara?
You did an an excellent job creating an atmosphere of fun and friendship. I look forward to reading more.
| 570K4 chapter 3 . 2/7/2014
Touching and adorable.
I liked seeing some of the old crew again. Garrus and Kasumi were very well written.
Aristotle was also a brilliant addition, but maybe I have a soft spot for Geth that have soft spots. Still, it is nice to see AI that can be more than cold, calculating machines.
I can't wait to read more.
| 570K4 chapter 2 . 2/6/2014
Hello, came straight here from the review tag. This was so adorable I just had to read another chapter. The dynamic between Shepard and Tali is masterfully done, giving me a thorough warm and fuzzy feeling. I find myself unable to come up with anything negative.
More background tidbits on how Rannoch is doing after the war maybe?
I don't know, great work.
| Joryn282 chapter 3 . 2/2/2014
Good chapter here. It was very touching and I think you captured all of their interactions really well. I could picture their conversations and reactions to everything going on really well. I haven't read any previous stories so my guess is that where's Aristotle comes from.
There were only a few instances where I saw some mistakes, but nothing major that took away from the story. All in all well done.
| Joryn282 chapter 2 . 1/22/2014
I enjoyed reading this chapter. I was able to imagine how Shepard and Tali would react while adopting a child. The process seemed a little quick to me, almost like going into a pet store to get a pet instead of adopting a baby, but it's far enough into the future that maybe you can head canon it somehow.
Anyway, the only real formatting qualm I have is that the word "had" is used too much. There were a lot of instances where it could have been left out to great effect. A good example of this is in the first paragraph:
"They had finished painting the room they had chosen for the child, and had acquired all the necessary items that came with having an infant."
There are three uses of the word had and you could effectively get rid of all three of them for the better.
"They finished painting the room they chose for the child, and acquired all the necessary items that came with having an infant."
Anyway, good story. I look forward to continuing this little prequel to Ria's story.
| Joryn282 chapter 1 . 1/18/2014
Good first chapter, there were a couple of things that stood out to me, but I'll get to that in a moment. I've been reading Pathways so it should be interesting to see little Ria at the beginning.
The interactions between Shepard and Tali are well done, and did a good job at capturing some apprehension to becoming parents.
As far as what stood out to me, when a character addresses another, there should be a comma before their name if it isn't the first word in the sentence. "Of course I would, John," would be an example for this.
Anyway, good read. I look forward to reading more.
| Talimancer chapter 18 . 1/12/2014
Best. Fanfic. I. Have. Ever. Read.