|Reviews for How Long I've Waited|
| SilentPony chapter 1 . 12/27/2013
I'd love to see more of this. Perhaps a more detailed version of events. Not to nitpick, but this felt more like the cliff notes of what could be a much greater story.
I'd love to see Peggy trying to deal with Steve's loss for all those years. Her watching Howard Starks kid from afar. What - if any - role did she play with the founding of SHIELD.
And really a more kick in the feels moment for their first reunion. I mean it's been only a year or so to Captain America. But it's been 70 long years for Peggy. There's gotta be some psychological scars and problems there...
But don't let this sound like I hated it. I didn't. I thought it was perfectly acceptable.
| Cale chapter 1 . 8/8/2013
| ym4yum1 chapter 1 . 5/8/2013
Sweet! Fluff is perfect for me! Romance and Steve always have my attention! ;)
| Guest chapter 1 . 3/23/2013
Good story, but poor Bruce. ; n;
| julliet15 chapter 1 . 1/2/2013
Oh my gosh they got married on January 20th! That's the same day as my best friend's birthday. What are the odds? Anyway, I like that you came up with a way for Steve and Peggy to be together. All in all this was a great fic!
| Carlsjr97 chapter 1 . 12/29/2012
That was amazing! It made me so so so happy! Your writing style is perfect and it was Wonderful:) you should write more
| tardissoul chapter 1 . 11/19/2012
BRAVO! It was so adorable the reunion between Steve and Peggy!
| Lorendiac chapter 1 . 11/19/2012
I'm as much of a sucker for a happy ending as the next person, and I admit I felt particularly sorry for Steve when, at the end of his solo movie, his first reaction to the discovery of how much time he'd missed was to realize he wouldn't be able to enjoy that first date with Peggy after all. So I generally like the way you handle this. It makes sense to me, for instance, that Natasha Romanoff wouldn't hesitate to IGNORE Fury's orders in favor of helping her friend Steve be reunited with his long-lost friend Peggy as quickly as possible.
One thing that isn't entirely clear: just how does the director of SHIELD (or anybody else) already know that Peggy took a shot of the serum a long time ago? Did she eventually tell anyone about it after she had already done it, way back when? Or did someone later file a report saying they suspected she had done it, but didn't know for sure, or what?
Nick Fury is the one who drags that subject into the conversation when he says he already thinks she got injected with the serum - but then, from the way he seems surprised by the details of her story, I get the impression that he didn't know much more than that!
Are we to assume that nobody in the U.S. government even suspected that Peggy had been injected with the serum until just recently, when SHIELD managed to track her down in Africa as a favor to Captain America, and then somebody noticed that ex-Army officer Peggy Carter still looked remarkably YOUNG after all these years? Is her obvious lack of aging the only reason Fury starts out by saying he thinks she got treated with the serum somewhere along the line? (That explanation would explain why nobody ever pestered her about it before now. Scientists on the Army payroll didn't ask her for regular blood samples and things, because back in the 1940s, they didn't realize she had taken the serum in the first place?)
Now for two bits of constructive criticism about where there's room for improvement. One about a medical detail, and one about a matter of punctuation. When I quote from your story, I'll put the quoted material inside sets of asterisks to set it apart from my commentary.
* * * It may have been awful for Steve, but it was much less painful for him than for Peggy. Steve had had penicillin, Peggy had not. But she was strong, and willed herself through it. * * *
Penicillin is not a painkiller. It's an antibiotic. It might help a human test subject avoid getting a nasty infection, but it wouldn't block out the pain from any sudden physical changes taking place in a person's metabolism.
(I think that in the 1940s a person who wanted a heavy-duty painkiller might have used morphine. I've read more than one fictional story from the mid-twentieth century in which characters suffering from recent gunshot wounds were prescribed morphine by their doctors in order to help them get through the day without unbearable pain while their bodies slowly healed. I think that sort of thing is actually why morphine was developed as a drug in the first place.)
There's a common mistake you're making in punctuation. I'll just quote two examples to illustrate where the problem is.
* * * "You do realize that that syringe could've been used to re-create the formula?" He asked. * * *
* * * "Excuse me, I need a few moments." She said. * * *
In the first example, the last two words should have been: "he asked" without a capital H.
In the second example, the line should have gone this way:
/ / / "Excuse me, I need a few moments," she said. / / /
I changed the capital S to a lower-case S, but I also changed the period after "moments" to a comma.
In both cases, the changes I made were based on one tricky little rule of punctuation. When a passage begins with a line of spoken dialogue in quote marks, and then is followed by a "speech tag" such as "he said" or "she asked," the dialogue and the speech tag are considered (for punctuation purposes) to be two portions of ONE larger sentence. So, since "he" and "she" are not the first words of brand new sentences, they don't need capitalization. And since "moments" was "not really" the last word of that entire sentence of your story, it didn't need to be followed by a period. The last part of that sentence of your story is the bit that tells who just said the words that were in quotation marks.
(I see this mistake happen a lot here on FanFiction. But if you grab a paperback novel and check a few conversational scenes in it, you'll see that what I just described is the way it's handled by the experts.)
| KLS98 chapter 1 . 11/10/2012
It was amazing and i cant wait to read the sequel. Happy writing
| hervissa chapter 1 . 11/10/2012
Yop, nice reunion...and I can't wait for another story with The Serum as main character ;)
P.S.: I like reviews too :D
| Your-Average-Not-Spider-Girl chapter 1 . 11/10/2012
The fluff was so beautiful I cried a bit. I'm so happy!