|Reviews for hardest of hearts|
| accnt no longer in use chapter 2 . 11/15/2012
Going to cut down on my waffling and get right into the review. xD
Again, I really like this chapter! I think the reality of what was happening just hit Lauren for the first time as she was lying in bed; as it often does with teenagers/people in general. She's right though - it's not fair to make a child choose between their parents, cause of equal love and so on. It is quite a big decision to force on someone of any age, cause usually there's a list of grievances and consequences as long as your arm.
The little insight into Charlie's mind was brilliant too - you can see that he's genuinely torn up about the possibility of losing both of his children. And I found the bit; "Maybe it was stupid to throw away marriage after this amount of time" was really sad, mainly because it's true. After fourteen years, you do think that the husband and wife will understand the psychology behind each other's decisions.
The part about Lauren slamming the door and making Louis drop his toast was funny - because I could just picture him sitting there all confused about his sister's outburst xD Cause usually when you're that age, change doesn't really bother you because you see the good in everything. New friends, new toys, new house, new swing-parks, and yeah I'm getting carried away. :3
The last paragraph was absolutely amazing - I think the way you wrote the bond between Lauren and Charlie was just.. asdfghjkl. It was so cute, and realistic, cause it's exactly the sort of way you'd expect a father and daughter to act in that situation. Their pinky promise was probably the best part of the whole chapter - it showed a real (family) love was there, and how good their relationship seems to be is lovely. I think you wrote it really well. :')
I think I've just typed a load of nonsense in this review, so I apologise haha. xD I just kinda get carried away when certain subjects come up, and I just waffle and waffle. So I'm sorry if this.. don't really make sense. :P
I love you loads! xxxx
| accnt no longer in use chapter 1 . 11/15/2012
Why the hell didn't I review this before? It's bloody brilliant aha. I need to seriously catch up on reviews, if I miss any, give me a poke. :P
I like the way you started this; although the idea of Charlie/Baz getting a divorce is quite upsetting haha. I loved how Lauren could already tell what the problem was before they even opened their mouths, just a little hint that everything hadn't been great in the Fairhead household for some time, I think. Or maybe I'm over-analyzing as usual aha!
I loved Lauren's attitude towards the whole divorce; it's exactly what you'd expect from someone that age. I love how she's not buying the whole "fallen out of love thing" cause nine times out of ten, it's a load of tripe anyway. How mature (and immature at the same time!) she acted in this was quite good, 'cause in other stories we've had Lauren taking drugs and throwing tantrums, etc. It was quite a pleasant character change, and it showed a different side to her.
When Baz said about the job offer in Canada, I was quite surprised, 'cause I'd assumed they were divorcing because of cheating or something similar. I can already tell that the offer of Canada might not end well for Baz, Charlie, or Lauren, cause I've a weird feeling she'll take her dad's side :3
This is amazing! I've said before, but I love your Lauren stories; she's such a complex, interesting character. You can just stick in her any situation and she makes it seem like she belongs there. It's quite amazing tbh, I can never do that. xD
I love you loads, I'm off to review the other chapters now :P xxxx
| For the Fish chapter 3 . 11/15/2012
I probably should have reviewed each chapter individually but I quite frankly don't have the energy because I'm chonically lazy... My effort scale is currently on 0. Yes, I have an effort scale! Only it seems ot be permanently stuck on 0...
Getting a bit off the subject there, I'm going to review this in three partsand this little part is for chapter 1 which I have open in a nother tab (I'm organised for once!) I found it interesting how Lauren was vaguely unsure of what was going to happen for a moment but it quickly dawned on her because it's easy to spot things like this- children often notice these things at the back of their mind but they don't quite realise what's happening until it becomes obvious. I also enjoyed the way you put in little touches to show that her normal fourteen-year-old life was going on- the way you mentioned how quickly time had flown before the exam and I think that's just how most teenagers react before their exams! I think the fact you broke the Canada thing at the very end of the chapter was clever because it halped me picture the awkward silence that would probably have followed- I found the lack of words made me realise just how quite the atmopshere in the room would have been. I'm not making sense here whatsoever, I do apologise!
I thought it was nice that Lauren, after telling them to treat her like an adult decided she wanted to just be a child again (I've moved onto chapter 2 now) I also thought all the questions in her mind seemed so real- just the questions I'd have had in my mind. The fact she stormed out was also good and the little speech was quite sad because you can kind of tell she wants to stay but doesn't want to hurt anyone and in a tiny way she's hoping her mum will decide to stay- it's a short speech that actually tells you a lot about how Lauren is feeling. I then thougth Charlie coming in and saying he wouldn't be angry was just what Charlie would have done and I thought it was good of him to make Lauren feel better, even though he's probably panicking about losing her he knows she has to do what she wants. This review probably makes even less sense because my three year old brother is telling me all about his new purple and green pet chimpanzee. How normal.
I then thought it was brilliant how you didn't actually tell us what decision she'd made until she told Charlie and the fact she said she wanted to tell him first maybe indicated she was actually going to leave. The fact you also mentioned how she'd been feeling uncertain was clever because that uncertainty wasn't really made so clear to us but we knew it was there in the back of her mind, if you know what I mean (I doubt anyone does) and the way you clarified it was a clever wyay of doing so. The way the uncertain was then reignited towards the end made it all more real and I just loved the last few lines, I really did :') It was a good way to end the story and I could genuinely see the scene happening and playing out as though it actually happened in Casualty.
When I said the review would be split into three parts I lied because this another general part! I loved how you could feel the confusion throughout but you kind of knew she wasn't particularly angry, onyl angry in certain sections. I also enjoyed how we got a look-in on Charlie's take on the whole situation in the second part, how he wasn't so sure a divorce was right. The goodbye was also so poignant and all the things said didn't seem cliched but were still emotional (it can be quite hard to get the balance right) and if you were interested, my brothers chimp will apparently have pink rabbit ears and a baseball cap :P
Another brilliant story I shall be favouriting and reading in times of trouble (because Mother Mary doesn't come to me. Yes, I'm listening to the Beatles and I couldn't resist putting that in there. I should be an unfunny comedian) :D This review has gotten rather on the long side, I am sorry! Probably why I should have reviewed each chapter as opposed to the story as a whole.