|Reviews for The 13 Games: Luxury|
| Blue Eyes Arch Angel chapter 24 . 1/7/2013
Yet another brilliant chapter jakey! It's a shame to see Shine leave;she was quite interesting actually!
Caitrin's and Iridium's parts stood out most here
| Chaos In Her Wake chapter 23 . 1/6/2013
D'aww, poor Sparkle is alone. I do like her new fear and grief for Shade, it's a good way to start developing her character in the Games. She's not lost her strength though- those moments where a tribute is almost found and killed are where we can tell that she's not a lost cause yet :)
I like the humor that Ismene considers her alliance with and I do agree that having a kill made Malachite act spoiled. Still I think that their alliance will last for a while more. Mostly though the focus of her POV is the cave thing and I can't wait to see where that leads!
TYRIAN. TYRIAN NO. You left Meaghan to die a terrible antsy acidic death YOU SHOULD DIE. It was a classic move for him though, something unsurprising but still a good plot point... man those mutts are terrific.
Jasper's POV was a good summary of the Career alliance- who is strong, who is weak, their faults and strengths, and the breaking point. The Pack dynamic is always one of my favorites and I'm really eager to see what you do with it. There's obviously dissent and even partnerships within the alliance, any of which could be the death of the Careers.
WHAT CORALIE. Velvet DeLushe, go die a terrible death. Mammoth is going to catch you alone and then you will be dead. Augh no she was sweet! But her death was definitely predicted and not surprising at all, I'll miss her but I won't grieve.
Happy writing Jake! XD
| SafeEyesOpen chapter 23 . 1/6/2013
REVIEW TIME REVIEW TIME REVIEW TIME
First off hello it is 7:11 in England holy crap make a wish.
So I liked this chapter omg.
Sparkle is now on her own oh no.
Save her Jake omg.
Maybe Mammoth and her can connect because their ally was killed and they can win together
i like that idea
mammoth and sparkle's team yes omg
please do that
it doesn't have to be permanent
maybe just a one time thing
consider that yes
okay so meghan awe
i kept thinking of out Megs LOL
I'm weird k
omg and that mutt gave me an idea
one of your future arenas should be like an ant hill
or part of it could be
omg i was like ants equal anthill asddfgjgjkf POSSIBLE ARENA WOO
i felt so sad when he left her.
and eww it burnt to her bone?
no wonder he left
i cant watch that ewwwwwwwww
like fish omg ewwwwwwwww
and her screams omg i shuddered
nice knowing you k bye
jasper was hereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
i liked her chapter
please dont let velvet kill her
i dont even like velvet
no offense to her
she just annoys me
who does she think she is
just stawp k
that chapter omggggggggggggggggggg
the emotion :,)
kk and then theres mammoth
you made my mammoth upset
now i hate you
k thanks i dont see you winning either way bye
omg shes gone
arrow to the neck
marvel wannabee LOL
okay so overall i loved this chapter new favorite
it was so emotional
like keep writing soon
k bye i love you _
| Anla'shok chapter 23 . 1/6/2013
Mammoth, Sparkle and Tyrian in a partnership vs the Careers. I totally can see that.
Tyrian you selfish cold-hearted jerk. That's the spirit, noble people get killed xD
I feel for Mammoth and Sparkle's fear was very well described.
All this tension in the Career pack... It feels like a ticking bomb.
| lala1366 chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Hey, sorry I haven't been reviewing, but this story is great! Really, I love the arena and the tributes and the deaths are so sad...Shade's really got to me. And now poor Sparkle has to know that he died going back to get the supplies for them. He was a good guy. And everything else so far is quite good! Another sad death was Coralie :( That poor girl and Mammoth! And now Tyrian is all alone too because Meaghan died. Ah, so many deaths! I can't wait to see what happens next!
| Olive chapter 22 . 1/5/2013
So apparently my first review was not "acceptable" so I guess I have to go through all the effort of logging in and leaving a better review. Yay, you best be happy Jake.
Meaghan (or however the heck you spell her name, whatever okay), her POV was kinda just an outlet where the arena was given a desrciption. BTW I like this arena, I like it lots. I think that it will kind of drive people nuts after a bit, you know like having to look at the same thing. You would feel like you are going in circles and urgh, that would be so confusing I would hate it.
Zepyr (yeah, names, idc, it can be spellt like this alright?) I think he be going insane, personally. His little like...argument I guess, thing was cute when he didn't know what he wanted. Well now he has the motivation to do it, but what if he is faced with someone like...not a Career? I would say Coralie but she be dead...so like Caitrin. Would he be able to kill like a Career? I don;t think he could, he is like giant fluffy teddy bear, but one with a knife I guess?
My baby, she be so smart. Yet Teddy and Vix still hate her -,- they be hating cause she is so awesome. Anyway, good job Cait! Hide in the rocks cause you be tiny :D The writing here was really good, I liked the way her fear was like...translated onto the page! Like I knew she woulnd't die, but I felt like maybe you had changed your mind and she might x.x and by M/I, no. Please, god, no.
The rest of it was really good, but all through the rest of this review, you guys are distracting me and making me freak out about getting a real life and I kinda want to pass out now if that is alright. So yeah, ending this review before I start giving random crap advice that no one will understand but me...
| Cashmere67 chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Sparkle qt you little firecracker you just did so well in your POV wow. But seriously, don't cry bb you have and that's all you need. Shade was a joke who didn't really care about you ok I care though so come to pappa. Eh, I want her to go further now and see more character development. She might be an emotional wreck from losing Shade, or she might become vengeful and want to kill whoever killed him. I can see a lot happening to her, anD SHE BETTER BE ALIVE SO I CAN SEE THAT STUFF GOT IT. Everyone hates on my obsession with you but it's good so no one else can steal you from me. Her last line was perfect since I really like it and what it means. Honestly, Sparkle, you could have killed Mammoth and Coralie but I know you didn't want to since you'd get dirty and feel ugly I feel you alright I wouldn't kill Mammoth either he's a waste of space and will die just like caitrin dw you'll win I know it ok
ismene stop it. ismene salis. you must stop. idk what you're doing but don't do it. oh a little tension between here and malachite eh. I want to see where their alliance goes and what happens to the two of them. Unfortunately, I can see both of them doing well which makes me claw my eyes out. wtf happened did they get booby trapped or something what even why are they ok they should have snapped a neck or cut a kidney or something. but the two of them are good fighters but eh no
what are you doing tyrian omfg go run back and help her do no thank her for her berries are u dumb what are you doing go throw the berries at the mutt and distract them. then you have the nerve to kiss her lmfao what even is going on with this alliance was this some game for you tyrian waiting for her to die right cute alliance and plan there like nope you're done bye not one of my favorites anymore nope I don't care about meaghan but still like ? bye meaghan you will not be missed
the careers are boring me honestly they treat julius and jasper like the two of them are some divine beings and nikolai is just the watch dog velvet is like the cray one of the group and shine is just shine who barely does anything. the careers will not last long and if one of the careers actually win I might cry because it won't make sense the careers have so many enemies and none of them are strong enough to fend off like mammoth or tyrian and when they all break away from each other none of them will be able to go alone in the arena. none of them will be emotionally stable; especially like jasper and julius. so yeah idk the careers are eh I can't wait until like mammoth and ismene and malachite and zephyr come and destroy the careers
sterling lmfao lol good your ally died now you're alone and it's all your fault. I still don't understand why mammoth had some obsession with coralie and it was really really weird. and what are you doing when you attacked the careers you're like 7 don't you dare put those knives in your hand you definitely fell of the bed while waking up ? do explain this to me run gurl run do not go near the careers. then you got what you deserved; an arrow in ya body. now you're dead and mammoth didn't even get revenge when you died lol how sad so he's not as obsessed as we think he is but yeah mammoth will do well in the games and probably kill a few tributes in memory of coralie so yeah bye
I approve of the tributes who died (y)
| Cashmere67 chapter 22 . 1/5/2013
well I didn't like this chapter that is why I wasn't reviewing idk I hate games chapter where no one dies like that's the point what do you think this is some ice cream parlor uhm no this is the hunger games people are supposed to die so im not doing pov by pov im done with that for this chapter ok
meghan I don't like you at all
duke you're ok but I don't like you
caitrin lmfao get outta here legit you make me want to cry myself to the pits of darkness
velvet hey I like you a lot ok
iridium no lol you're alright though
Right so great writing and I will go review the next chapter.
I do like the alliances, though, more than I thought I would. I think out of all of these POVs - just making my own question, honestly - I think Iridium will go the furthest, or Duke. One of those two. Caitrin will die a slow painful death, which everyone will be happy about.
Before I read the next chapter, I sort of figured Meaghan would die. I just felt that she would die and Tyrian wouldn't really help her. Their alliance is wearing thin and just doesn't seem like the most suitable for the games.
Duke and Zephyr talking about the deaths though made me want to die like omfg alise u ok wake up form your teenage dream u ok
I can't stop laughing at the line where Nikolai stroked Velvet's knee bye im a 5 year old just like caitrin LML
iridium is a tad like katniss and a little cliche but I can see her doing well
well yeah bye lol have a nice night you maggot
| District11-Olive chapter 22 . 1/5/2013
This was gorgeous, so good :D!
| The Light Holder chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Omg Sparkle bb it's okay stay strong you will be able to go on without Shade. Okay I think Sparkle's going to stay around for quite a while because usually when a tribute loses their ally they go through this huge character development and then afterwards they're all badass and amazing (either that or they just cry the whole time)
OMG THEY FALL INTO AN ABYSS OR SOMETHING AND THEY'RE NOT EVEN HURT ladies and gentleman, Malachite and Ismene *cue the applause*
TYRIAN I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM YOU JUST LEAVE HER THERE TO DIE AFTER KISSING HER FOREHEAD WTF NO I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU UGH
Poor Nikolai, he's literally being left for the wolves. I mean, they might not think he's going to get killed or anything but just ugh something terrible is going to happen to him next chapter I just know it okay I'm psychic
Coralie wtf are you even doing omg you're supposed to be all sweet and stuff so why are you being a beeyotch god I think she's on her period or something and I'm like 99.9% sure that she took some stupidity pills today because dear lord you're like four feet tall why are you trying to attack a Career omg just what even Coralie what even. MAMMY-MOO, DON'T BLAME YOURSELF! You didn't fail her bbface she failed herself ok
I think this or the bloodbath is probably my favorite chapter so far... awesomeness! Thank you so much for doing such a lovely job with Coralie, and I'm very much glad I entered her in this! :)
| District11-Olive chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Ew, the way Meaghan died was nasty, like covered in ant acid. Gross and very much not a nice way to go... but alas I never really liked her that much so she can die.
Aww, Coralie's was a bit more emotional. Careers thought she might have been Caitrin, wow. If it was I would not be pleased, though that part did show how much the Careers didn't care about who they were killing. They wanted to just get rid of anyone and everyone.
I like the way you write people talking, so that it actually seems like the characters could be saying what they are. It just flows so nicely, you know? I like that.
I don't really know who I want to win now. I just keep changing my mind. I kind of want Malachite and Ismene to win, just because you always do need those crazies. But then like, no. Cuz yeah, no.
PS: If you, Nikolai, attack your section partner, Caitrin, I will personally go into that arena and smack you. You two are basically district partners so no, you are not allowed to kill her. Anyone else, not you (wait not Julius either. For obvious reasons.)
| Sgarnett99 chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Me? Life outside of fanfiction? LOL, no.
Therefore I shall review.
So, like, Meaghan's dead. I guess i thought she was strong enough to make it further but clearly TYRIAN IS A TERRIBLE BETRAYING ALLY SO OF COURSE HE WOULDN'T HELP HER
-that part made me a little sad for her :/ but i think she's lived her excitement and didn't have much interesting going on at the moment so I think that death was a good choice
even if it was
Coralie? Come on. Now sterling doesn't have anyone to die protecting but that was really cute anyways and it made me all sad like why do you have to write emotional stuff WHYYY :'/
so now mammoth is all alone and I feel like him and Duke and Zephyr should all like team up and unleash their full fury on the Careers like
KILLING SPREE WHAT NOW BIATCHES
that would be an incredible chapter 24.
I'm sad about Coralie but she's not as helpless as Alise and she could've gone further so she's kinda dumb I guess
She was such a qt though :/
Oh yeah and i half want Julius and Jasper to win just because they could be a cute couple like we already have the star crossed lovers of district 12 why not the star crossed brutal Career lovers of district 1.
Jasper's okay. She's a career so she's like evil and everything I guess but she seems like a nice enough person ya feel me? Well I think she would be less interesting if she didn't have this whole friendship (but we all know what it should become) so that was a good choice for the story.
Wonderful writing Jake :)
| The Light Holder chapter 22 . 1/5/2013
Not even gonna comment on Meaghan's because I read the next chapter and tHEIR RELATIONSHIP MEANS NOTHING TO TYRIAN OMG UGFGAH
ZEPHYR WHAT EVEN IS WRONG WITH YOU OMFG YOU'RE AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PERSON FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE STORY HOLY FREAKING CRAP DUDE GET SOME MEDICATION SOME EYEDROPS FOR THOSE BLOODSHOT EYES DEAR LORD DUKEY BOO GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY
Aw, it's times like these when Caitrin is a little baby-boo and I'm in love with her because she's just so cute. I was actually pretty convinced that Malachite and Ismene were gonna hunt her down and that would be the end of Caitrin but nah she's still alive. Bee tee dubs this POV was really really good like I feel the fear literally like popping out of the writing and just woah
Iridium come over here and give me a hug I just ily so much and you're so amazing and when she started crying I wanted to cry because just aw
| Blue Eyes Arch Angel chapter 23 . 1/5/2013
Meaghan? NO! *sigh* things like this happen,oh well.
Once again a very dramatic chapter,Mammoth's was absolutely incredible.I was nearly crying at his reaction Coralie's death!
| The Light Holder chapter 21 . 1/4/2013
Oh my god, whenever you say that a chapter is shorter than usual or isn't your best or something I have literally no idea what you're talking about because they're all amazing and I can't see anything different and just whoa
Agh, Shine's character started out so amazingly and she stuck out so much in the Reapings but now she's just such a blah-y background character idk maybe it's because she's still trying to figure out her life and stuff. Omg, poor Brann. He didn't even get a chance, that's just sad. The Wheel of Fortune was a really cool idea though, I hope it's in all the other Games as well
Zephyr's kind of scaring me, but his picture on the blog is really adorable so I'll let it slide... I KNEW ALISE WAS GONNA DIE, MWAHAHA I'M PSYCHIC! Meh, I do feel bad for her since she's blind and didn't really have a chance, but she really really irked me and I'm kinda glad she died since I can stop being a beeyotch about her now.
MALACHITE ILY! Idk I just think he and Ismene are good villain-y characters for this story and his coming-out or whatever was pretty cool. Omg, Coralie was being such an idiot I can't even like really Coralie really you're just going to stand there? *facepalm* At least Mammoth was there to save her, and yayy he didn't kill Malachie! I love Malachite way too much, omg. I was actually kind of happy when he killed Cypra, I didn't ever really like her at all and she probably would've gotten annoying after a while.
Julius y u gotta be like this? I seriously wanted him to like not join the Careers and become the person he really was during the Games but NO ugh. JULIUS DON'T YOU DARE CALL ANYBODY A PRETENDER. Oh my god Oily nooooo, but why did he have to be so stupid :'( And Shadey-shoo is dead too! Darn. Sparkle is all alone now, too... :(
Amazing bloodbath! :D