|Reviews for Harry Potter and the Gaining of Power|
| atymer chapter 7 . 2/1
I have speculated on what happened to ole Voldy and the consequences of Harry's decision, but alas, I will not air them while I wait for the author to fill me in. It is a tortourous wait, but the story is intriguing to this point and I want to see where everyone winds up.
I really frightened by the things that have spawned from the horcurx and the ritual. They are so not the nutcase Voldy but someThing and monstrous at that. *shivers*
| Dr Stranger chapter 2 . 1/27
Oh, and I wanted to point out that Malfoy told Dobby not to share his secrets AFTER telling him that he belong to Harry. At that point Dobby wasn't bound to Malfoy anymore, and didn't have to listen to him. Just saying.
| Lupinesence chapter 7 . 1/24
Great fic so far :)
| Yana5 chapter 7 . 1/23
| Thorndsword chapter 1 . 1/23
"Harry's thoughts kept stuttering and skipping, and he felt dull and stupid."
That's because he is.
| firelordeg chapter 7 . 1/23
thank you for sharing this fantastic chapter please continue to update as life allows
| geetac chapter 7 . 1/23
I like the chapter
| Jharry1960 chapter 2 . 1/23
Nice story but your Dumbledore seems even more blind, stupid, and delusional than in canon. Nobody could see Harry at the beginning of the year, know what it took to get him his letter and heard what Hagrid no doubt told him transpired, seen his clothes, and known he'd been locked and barred with no food in his room and would believe he was being treated any better than a prisoner of war by the Nazis. It's a good thing Luna is an empath.
| Aria Dragoncrest chapter 6 . 9/10/2013
Excellent! It flows really well.
| atymer chapter 6 . 8/25/2013
This may be a more than interesting journey back to Hoggiewarts.
Luna is such a delight. I look forward to Nev surprising me.
| GL chapter 6 . 8/17/2013
i like jam on toast with butter too...
| Prie chapter 6 . 8/16/2013
I'm lost and not in a good way. Your plot exists, but there is no story being told. It's like reading a wold history text about 1945. We listen to you change the different POV's and it just confuses the reader. Your experimenting with a new idea and style, but you haven't seen what is successful and what isn't. I would suggest a beta.
| Anon chapter 6 . 8/15/2013
I can see why these chapters were fighting you, seeing as they're both incredibly boring and contribute approximately nothing to the narrative. Chapter 6 is especially bad.
Your grasp of spelling and grammar, while not perfect, is clearly superior to the vast majority of writers on this site, so I won't focus on that. Instead, you could stand to improve your plotting. Rarely have I seen a more perfect example of the "Four Lines, All Waiting" trope in action. You are attempting to focus on too many characters, most of whom are entirely irrelevant to the matter at hand. You MUST narrow it down if you want to maintain a coherent story.
I assume that you have read the Harry Potter books, so you should probably recall that, apart from a handful of chapters, they are all written from the same, single point of view: that of Harry Potter. Those chapters which have a different point of view are consistent in that they maintain the same point of view throughout the entire chapter. I'm not saying that you necessarily HAVE to stick to that formula. It's entirely possible that another point of view could add a great deal to a story, but a multitude of tiny snippets just aren't important enough to break up the flow. Chapter 6 has at least 12 points of view, and is nothing but a chore to read.
As far as the actual plot goes, it's rather hard to detect one. Sure, you have a somewhat different and interesting beginning to a story, but a story needs a middle and an end, as well. So far we have Harry running away from the Dursleys and then... reflections, portents, and Harry flying around and camping in the woods (which most people consider the worst part of Deathly Hallows, so I'm not sure why you added it). What we DON'T have is anything happening. It all feels like a delaying action. Those are perfectly justifiable in warfare. When telling a story... not so much.
| southern-reader chapter 6 . 8/15/2013
I don't know about any one else, but I am tired of the 'tendrils of darkness' crap.
If it makes no sense...
And I don't want to hear that it will be explained in a later chapter.
If a writer can't explain what is going on while what is happening is happening, they probably never will.
| serialkeller chapter 6 . 8/15/2013
It's really good so far, but I am so bloody confused with what is going on, has voldemort's higher brain functions died and his horcruxes are just living off their hunger due to the loss of a soul fragment or what? Also did harry forget what his dark side said to him when he said that he can make any potion with any different ingredients? Also did he absorb voldie's horcrux or did he make it pass on and if he did absorb it after possibly purifying it, why didn't he get any of the memories?