Reviews for Lost In Myst |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Good to see you make a return! I missed you! Certainly a good chapter, although I kind of was a bit lost as to what was happening. Which is abnormal for me; usually I have a relatively good grasp on such things, no matter how long it has been. Anyways, I look forward to more from you. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh look, yer not dead. Anyway, enjoyable, despite the brevity. I gotta say, I feel sorry for Miko, for being set upon by both the Prismrivers AND the Tsukumos. She's going to wake up with a headache. |
![]() ![]() ![]() ...Suwako getting serious? That's not something good... Oh and I forgot but, who's Rika again? And I hope you really are going to sort out the mess sometimes soon... it has been quite a messy mess (nah, don't worry, just my inner neat freak acting). That said, I can't wait to return to the main plot. |
![]() ![]() ![]() As far as I remember, Marisa doesn't spout that much 'ze's in canon. The Mini-Hakkero was custom-made by Rinnosuke so how did Yuuka get her hands on one? And really, how the hell did Satori managed to shoot a Master Spark? While it might be possible for her to construct dolls using her magic, it takes a lot of raw-magics to shoot them and Satori has been stated to not be a combative Youkai. Well, those problems asides, I am troubled whether to say that the plot should move faster or not. On one hand, the build-up has been taking a while, on the other hand, I think you should elaborate more on some events. Though the fact that you show the other characters is nice, showing that they do have a life. So I guess I say "Not bad but not very good either." |
![]() ![]() ![]() The intros tends to feel... weird. I can't exactly describe it well but just weird. Also, the Flashback and Summoning scene felt out of place. You should have made some sort of building up first. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Heh. I liked the way you shifted from us seeing the fight by way of short PoV. Always fun to shift the happenings at the last moment. Going from, "Ohh, we're about to hear something interesting!" To, "Aww... She can't see it... Poo..." ...I just found that I never hit enter! My review has been done all day... |
![]() ![]() ![]() I like your OC. There are some parts similar to typical OCs but at the same time, he is really interesting thanks to his insanity you can say. Still, maybe it's just me but it's kind of hard to imagine how he looks like. Perhaps you could have made the descriptions a little simpler? Having a detailed description kind of restricts my imagination. By the way, can you tell me the measurements in metric? I'm not really good with other measurement systems you see. |
![]() ![]() ![]() You have quite the interesting way to get me to laugh. I was quite amused by your use of the main cannon, what with you tying it to telling her to be quiet. Poor maid... She surely didn't see that coming, for whatever reason. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh dear gods. Shinki isn't even being the slightest bit subtle hitting on Rika here. Why am I immediately tempted to blame Sharna? |
![]() ![]() ![]() I like this a lot. You're very good at writing Marisa. Maybe because you're both brutally honest and love pushing people's buttons? ;D -A jade dragon |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oho, so it 'was' another PoV! I had been wondering what you planned next. I half expect Reimu to come next, or maybe Satori, so I look forward to being proven wrong! Anywho, as always, keep up the great work! I look forward to what comes next from you. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Jeez, your Yuuka sure can be scary, can't she? I wonder if the next chapter will be the fight, or if it will bring more people into the mix? Well, this'll be interesting regardless of this. I wish you good luck, and look forward to what comes next! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oho, interesting! Interesting, indeed! I wonder just who it was that she saw? Yuuka? Yukari? The former makes more sense - who else would beat her for no apparent reason? |
![]() ![]() ![]() ELLY! :3 |
![]() ![]() ![]() Komachi amuses me greatly. |