Reviews for Black Rock Shooter : A New Story Begins
Guest chapter 2 . 3/20/2013
please continue
Ryuuohjin chapter 2 . 3/13/2013
Seems intresting
Lu Bane Na chapter 1 . 12/29/2012
Well, don't feel bad about this, but I can't really say anything yet. There's just not enough of this chapter for me to go on. I like that you have good spelling. The only negative, and this is a slight negative, is the abuse of the pronoun 'She' at the beginning of many sentences.
animefan106 chapter 2 . 12/15/2012
That sounds good. Two chapters a week will keep me entertained. The storyline is definitely different but its quite interesting. I like how this is going and what is happening. Saya is already one antagonist while we have W*RS as a different antagonist. I honestly can't wait for the fighting to happen.
HeadServantJo chapter 2 . 12/10/2012
Seems a bit interesting. Adding to favs.
But some parts of your writing style needs to be changed:
1) too much unnecessary details. E.g. I opened the door and walked out. When you could just put is as 'I walked out.' or 'I walked out of the room through the door'
2) a wider range of vocabulary is needed. Like instead of using the word 'hug' a lot, you could try 'embrace'. (using the thesaurus might help)
3) cut unnecessary dialogue. (explained in 1) you are also encouraged to not use 'said' so much.

I usually just skim through the paragraphs because of the above.
Looking forward to an update, and never stop writing!
fbiuzz chapter 2 . 12/10/2012
Cant wait for the chapters! Only can you try to separate the scenes between reality and Otherworld? It would cause less a headache to read.
Zrye13 chapter 2 . 12/9/2012
need long chapters :D
Knight25 chapter 2 . 12/9/2012
Nice chapter!
wind scarlett chapter 1 . 12/8/2012
All I could say was, this is a good start, keep on rocking!

I like the way you explain BRS in the Otherworld. She was so IC, yet alluring.
Knight25 chapter 1 . 12/8/2012
Interesting. Please continue when you can.