|Reviews for Dark Water|
| Guest chapter 3 . 1/14
I love this story! It is just amazing. you can't leave it at a cliff hanger like that. Please, please, please continue this story. Please.
| narutovsitachi6 chapter 3 . 11/18/2015
| No one important chapter 3 . 11/11/2015
Amazing plz keep writing!
| acrisafu chapter 2 . 10/6/2015
Totally re-read this!
I hope you decide to finish this! It's a great story and I'd love to see the end. (:
| acrisafu chapter 3 . 6/22/2015
Wow this is good! Like really good, so I don't think your gonna make Jack die. He's gonna be under Pitch control... or slave? I could be wrong but that's what it feels like.
I know it's been forever but PLEASE don't let this die. It's an awesome story and I'd like to see it to the end. Any chance of picking this up again?
| MoonlitFudge chapter 3 . 6/18/2015
PLZ, do more chapters!
| DragonRobotkid676 chapter 3 . 4/11/2015
Please update soon
| ClockworkSpinner chapter 3 . 4/2/2015
please oh please update this. i understand it been ... awhile ? XD
i really like how its written and i want to know what happens next :D
| iB3LIEVE chapter 3 . 4/20/2014
WHY WON'T ANYONE UPDATE OMG UGHHH
| Lavacat242 chapter 3 . 4/5/2014
OMG! Keep it up! Dont u even think about letting Jack die. Save Him!
| The Fandom Garrison chapter 3 . 11/28/2013
Okay, this is a very good story! You use good grammar, the dialogue is realistic, and the vocabulary is advanced yet understandable!
Now, my critique: occasionally, the current ideas can be a bit scattered—one example was all along chapter two, when things were happening fast and all at once. In a way, your writing made the ideas seem a bit too scattered to connect. Try prepositional phrases—these will help connect your ideas. An example:
Something happens, like the sickening gurgling noise comes from Jack. Then, you talk about north preparing to rip the spear out. To better establish that these two things are happening at the same time, try something like:
AS Jack convulsed and fought, North took a deep breath, preparing himself for what he knew would be an experience that would change them all.
Using as, while, since, if, etc will help the reader see that multiple things are happening at once!
Thank you for writing this! It truly is amazing!
| Guest chapter 3 . 9/28/2013
I love it! Please write more!
| Bethany Smith chapter 3 . 6/1/2013
Please continue this! email me
I really want to read more of this
| Caithlinn13 chapter 3 . 5/31/2013
This story is really intens! Please update soon! I really want to know what's going to happen and what the Guardians will do about it! :D
| PippaFrost chapter 3 . 5/8/2013
Wowww ! this fanfic is awsome! is jack staff really gonna change anything? because even with it the poison would still be inside him !
Please keep writting! i can't wait for the next chapter!