Reviews for Remembering
writhen heart chapter 1 . 8/19/2014
This was wonderful, Jess! I can see what you mean about developing your hcs for minor characters here. It was awesome that you had such distinct personalities for them all. And of course, it felt completely realistic and canon compatible, which is great. I think my fav parts would be xiii, xix and x, as I felt they had the strongest voice's and were quite original. Lovely job! :D
EugeniaS chapter 1 . 7/31/2014
Wow... I've got no words. It is brilliant..
Ember Nickel chapter 1 . 1/11/2014
Heh, I liked Su, fleshing out a name-only character with some always-relevant Hogwarts concerns. :D Impressive job trying to tie in the movie Carrows with the ones we know from the books.
17 Hope chapter 1 . 12/8/2013
I really like the story and characterisation that you did. I really liked Astoria Greengrass and then probably Lisa Turpin. I loved the line "and for once in her life she wanted to make a stand, and she would do so." In Morag MacDougal. I also really liked how you ended it
TheOnlyTrueMagic chapter 1 . 8/5/2013
This was very interesting. I had never really considered the experiences of some of the more minor characters. I liked Astoria best. Great details all around.
InLoveWithLaughing chapter 1 . 4/29/2013
If this review is too long I’ll PM you it :)

Okay. Wow. You made me cry. Seriously. I'm sitting here trying to stop tears coming down my face. Because this was amazing. Really Fucking Amazing. With capitals. I can't even tell you how much I loved this. It was just an incredible, touching piece of writing. I can't tell which section I liked best, because they were all so so so good. I want to go through each section and spend hours picking them apart and telling you exactly why they were so amazing, but that would take forever, so I'll try to keep them as short as possible :3

Demelza: I love your characterisation here. It's just perf. It so funny and light-hearted, and shows really well how the students must have felt going back to Hogwarts- sort of knowing something was wrong, but not really grasping how bad it really was.

Su Li: Your version of Su was really nice, and refreshing since most authors make her out to be a quiet swot. I love that you had her so angry about Quidditch as well, this was the thing that warned me that this fic might be a tearjerker because (and I'm probably reading too into this, but oh well) she was ranting about something so insignificant (not to her obviously, but in the long run) compared to everything that happened and knowing she'd probably see it as silly in the future when looking back was just asdfghjkl; And Padma's replies showed that she understood and were just so perf!

Rose Zeller: I haven't ever thought about Rose, but now I love her. People don't think a lot about how the younger years must have felt, and now I just want to go to Hogwarts (who doesn't?) and cuddle them all and tell them it's alright. You have a genius with closing lines as well, which I noticed here. Ending on the thought that they would have to stay in that hell hole for so long was an excellent decision.

Megan Jones: Now, I love Megan Jones, primarily because she has the same name as me, and you definitely did her justice. You keep giving these little backgrounds to the characters, and it makes me fall in love with all of them. It makes them more /real/ and that makes the writing even more vivid. So yeh. Perfect as always. I like the little changes in each section, showing how the students got more and more miserable as the year went on. And again with the last line!

Hestia Carrow: If I /had/ to choose a favourite section, this might be it. You gave her so much background in such a short piece, and made me feel sorry for her even though she was torturing a little girl. But more than that, it makes perfect sense that she is. Obviously that doesn’t make it okay, but it makes it that much sadder. And you’re killing me with the last lines. “even if it meant listening to a thirteen-year-old scream in agony on the floor.” I think this was where I realised I certainly wasn’t going to make it through the fic without crying.

Kevin: You once again made Su (how many times can I use the word perfect before you start banging your head against the keyboard? ;)) But it really is. I love how you showed how much Kevin had changed since the war in this as well. No jokes, in love, it makes them all seem so grown up. Which they really shouldn’t be at their age. And the House Healers… I can’t even. Just so (yes I’m going to say it again) perfect.

Stephen: The freaking personalities you give the characters! I just want to jump inside your brain and learn how you do it (in the least creepy way possible). And reviewing this after reading that he dies! Why would you do that to me?

Euan: The snow. The childish traditions. The way you showed how the Carrows fucking ruined everything. "Maybe that's why we should still go outside” ! I now ship Euan/Rose by the way.

Theodore: *squee* You write the Slytherins so well! You don’t make them automatically awful people or dark. They’re just like everyone else; doing the best they can in the situation they’re in.

Jimmy: Again with the perf characterisations! Jimmy is just this awkward teenage boy with a crush and it’s so adorable! And I can’t even tell you how much I love Romilda in this. She’s completely straight forward and honest, and I just want her to kiss Jimmy already and tease him and make him blush and have a ridiculously cute relationship with him.

Vicky: This is once again another beautiful point of view. And so very sadly realistic. And you didn’t make it seem slutty or crude, just another coping method. And the way you keep comparing the characters with their past selves! It’s wonderful. And I need to stop starting sentence with And.

Blaise: This seems like the opposite side to the DA. Not going with the Carrows, not going against them, just trying to deal as best he can. Lovely look at Blaise. And it’s just as heart-breaking as the rest.

Mandy: There wasn’t so much of how Mandy herself was dealing in this, which was more telling than if there had been (again, possibly reading too much into it). She cares about others and focuses more on them than herself, she’s trustworthy as she doesn’t tell their secrets, and she’s strong enough to cope in silence. Wow. I now love Mandy. And the flash of Astoria in this was perf!

Jack: Yay, more Demelza! I love how you write the crushes in this, is so adorable! And the conversation was so bittersweet. If not for the war it could have been a lovely moment talking about their future, but because of it, it’s sad.
Astoria: Go Astoria! She’s such a lovely person in this. Doing her bit to get at the Carrows in a Slytherin sort of way, knowing that if she’s caught she’ll be horribly punished.

Owen: The way you show how they’ve all changed since the war is the saddest thing of all. And Owen helping Rose is just the bravest thing! You’re making me ship Owen/Rose as well as Euan/Rose now. Thanks. :P

Lisa: YOU KILLED STEPHEN! AND LISA HAD TO WATCH! I had to take a little break here, because it was actually too sad to keep reading. I like that you didn’t have Lisa go back for him, so many people would have had her say “I’m not leaving you!” and try to get Stephen up. I wish you had, but I’m glad you didn’t. It’s more realistic and tragic this way.
Ritchie: I like this look at the DA when they were in hiding. You got the atmosphere of safety and home across really well by the way Ritchie was so relaxed, and I love how you showed Neville’s leadership and how much he grew during the war.

Morag: Oh wow. I can imagine this scene perfectly, how scared she’d be but how determined to fight. The line “And for once in her life, she wanted to make a stand, and she would do so.” was amazing, because again it showed how much the war had changed her (I know I keep saying that, but you kept writing it so perfectly!).
The students: Perfect ending. You didn’t single anyone out, there was no hero or someone who was better than the rest. All of them mattered, and all would be remembered.

“All of them made contributions. All of them were important. All of them will be remembered.” And my heart is officially shattered.

Okay. So it’s safe to say you broke my heart several times during this fic, and I love you for it :3 It was so perfect and you’re such an amazing writer, I can’t wait to read the rest of your fics. I can’t express properly how amazing this really is, but you should be incredibly proud of yourself. I’ll stop rambling now. Thank you for an amazing read :3
bluemacaroons chapter 1 . 2/10/2013
First of all; I love the concept for this, I've never really come across a fic that focused on characters that weren't part of the main plot before. And I liked how you laid it out too, with each characters getting a small part and a glimpse into what there life was like during the war, and how sometimes the characters' small portions connected with others. It gave a really good sense of what it was like for each type of person during the war; Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws and Slytherins, and to see three different sides of the Slytherin view, the one that was typical, one that was forced into doing things she didn't want to do and the one that rebelled. So I really liked it, very well done (:
IrishDancer chapter 1 . 2/7/2013
Three cheers for Astoria!
Lillia-Lillia chapter 1 . 2/5/2013
This was just an amazing story. Very well-written and thought provoking. It was nice to read about some of the lesser mentioned heroes, and ones from different houses. This fic was truly amazing and you should be very proud of it!
StrawberryDuckFeathers chapter 1 . 2/4/2013
I'm not sure if FF will cut this review short or not. If so, I'll PM you it instead and, if it doesn't fit the PM, I'll put it in a blog post and PM you the link. ;) Sorry I didn't review sooner and sorry this took so long, I wanted to spend a few days on it since I wanted to make it as detailed as possible for you. :)
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ROMILDA VANE:

Your portrayal or Romilda is amazing, and pretty funny. :P She seems like she has her head in the clouds quite a bit, always looking at boys, and she seems to get pretty stressed-out when her friend accuses her of something. :P

(Oh, I know that," Romilda said airily) Haha, I love how she just brushes off the idea that there's more to life than looks here. :P

(Romilda scoffed, running a hand through her mane of dark, wild hair.) This part makes me think that Romilda is quite a proud character, if not rather careless about other's opinions. She doesn't listen when she's told life isn't all about looks, and she doesn't seem to listen here, either. :P

("I've moved on from that!" Romilda protested, collecting her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. ) Haha! This part made me chuckle. It's like she's telling herself she's over it, but she really isn't. :P

("You barely knew Harry Potter," Demelza muttered) This was another part that made me crack up. I love how Romilda walks away, seemingly mortified. :P

I have no critique or suggestions for this section. :)
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SU LI:

Wow, Su isn't someone I'd want to get on the bad side of. :O No wonder she's really irritated if she loved Quidditch that much. There's nothing quite like not being able to do your favourite stuff anymore. :(

("They canceled Quidditch!" Su slammed the door ) This is great. Already, by the first sentence, we can tell that Su seems to be quite a fiery person, or that she has a very extreme love for Quidditch, and being thrown off her Quidditch routine really makes her angry. :O

(I go into Snape's office and he just says 'Quidditch games and practices are canceled this year, Miss Li,' and turns back to the papers on his desk." She swore again, kicking the corner of her bed.) Wow, Snape seems pretty uninterested in what Su had to say. Then again, he seems uninterested in stuff quite a lot. :P I like how you've kept him in-character.

(mentally vowing that she would get back at the Carrows and Snape somehow, someday.) I love how determined she is at the end. :P
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ROSE ZELLER

I love how you've given them all completely different personalities. :) Rose seems a bit more caring than Sui did, and much more caring than Romilda did. :P It's quite sweet how she both wants to care for the first-ear, and also do something about the Carrows. It's an interesting balance between her nice side, and what might be a more vengeful side to her. :)

I love how you wrote the dialogue for the first-year, it sounds so innocent and cute. :)

(Rose said kindly as a first year stumbled into the Hufflepuff common room, tears streaked down her face.) I love this part- it makes her seem so caring. :)

(They had years left with the Carrows, and that was the scariest notion of all.) I like how this part makes it seem like the battle with the Carrows will seemingly never end. :O

My only bit of critique for this is changing 'aftereffects' to 'after-effects'. :)
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MEGAN JONES

Aww, the intro to this one was so sweet! I also think it's cool how Megan's parents don't use magic for absolutely everything, and so that makes Halloween at Hogwarts even more special for her. :)
It's really sad when things are different, though, as if all the fun has been taken away. :(

The Carrows again? Man, they seem to be ruining the fun for everyone. :/ It's awesome how unlikable you make the villain. :) I'm hoping that all of these students will end up teaming up against the Carrows soon. :D Wow, even the whole atmosphere of the place changes whilst they're around... they really do sound pretty darn evil. Hopefully they get their asses kicked later. :P

My apologies, but I have no critique/suggestions for this section. :)
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HESTIA CARROW

So, let's see what the Carrows have up their sleeve this time around...I like how you include the P.O.V of, what seems to be, the bad character...or maybe that's the other Carrows? :O

Wow! Hestia thought she was in for something not too bad, but making her practice her spells on other students?! Judging by her personality, I doubt she'd want to do that. Maybe she'll refuse?

("Get on with it, girl," Alecto snarled) I love all of the little things you use to make Alecto really stern, dark and mean. :)

(She definitely did not want to be taking lessons in the Dark Arts from her aunt, but there was no way around it.) To me, this has a second meaning...maybe her aunt is trying to lead her to the 'darkness', to their rather-evil way of controlling things?

(her voice steady and neutral.) Hmm, this part makes me think that maybe Hestia isn't the one who's ruining everything. Maybe the others Carrows are making her go along with their plans?

(This year, things were different.) I love this quick sentences- it sounds stern and serious, as if the 'different' isn't the good kind of 'different'...

(if it meant listening to a thirteen-year-old scream in agony on the floor.) That ending was amazingly dark, but the 'scream in agony' part makes you feel really sorry for that student who got cursed. :(
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KEVIN ENTWHISTLE

Wow, what's going on with Su? Was it the-

Yep, it was those dastardly Carrows. I love how hateable you've made them- I really hope they get sorted out soon. ;)

I really like how resilient Su's character seems to be, managing to try and get up, despite the serious injury. Maybe that resilience will come in handy, since they will probably fight back at the Carrows. :)

(planning a prank. He was completely serious) This is cool! It's like this is so serious to him that he's completely serious, and not his usual self. I like it. :)

(sneaking peeks at her the whole time, and wishing things were different - wishing that Su wasn't in love with Lisa, wishing that she was in love with him, and wishing that the Carrows would never hurt her again.) Aww, so it turns out that he wishes for a lot of things to be different... that's sweet, but sad. :(
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STEPHEN CORNFOOT

Ooh, cool! Stephen seems different from the others- he seems intelligent, mature and rather sophisticated. :) It's a shame that he can't tell Lisa that they'll be safe, though... it's quite sad that there's no way he can reassure her. It seems like he wants to, but can't. :( I'm not sure why, but something is telling me that Stephen really wants to lend a hand in making Hogwarts a safer place. :)

(puppy or kitten, considering how innocent, naive, and kind she was.) Aww, I like the various ways in which you show Lisa's innocence. :)
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EUAN ABERCROMBIE

Wow, Euan seems a bit moody at first, such as how he doesn't react much to the snow, and doesn't care that he interrupts Rose. Yeah, I can imagine that everything going on would definitely take their minds off of the snow. :(

("Rose, it's snowing outside," Euan said slowly) Hmm, most people would be happy about the snow. Maybe he's fed up of the snow, or maybe the incoming danger in Hogwarts has left him not in the mood for snow. :(

I have one piece of critique for this piece. (Their voices are quiet, and no one was around) Here, 'are' should be 'were' so it fits with the present tense. :)

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THEODORE NOTT

Hmm, his relationship with the Slytherin members seems interesting. He doesn't seem bothered about them at all, at first, but not in a look-down-your-nose way, like some of the other characters do. :)

Wow, I didn't realise he was actually a Slytherin. He seems pretty damn selfish. :/ I wonder if his mind will change later, if the Carrows cause further trouble?

(noticing how few people had remained over Christmas holidays. It was true that most people went home, yes, but this year there were even fewer students who had remained. ) I quite like this sentence, as it seems to show that people would rather be safe at home with their families, should anything happen to Hogwarts at Christmas time. :(
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JIMMY PEAKES

He seems pretty clueless as to what to ask Romilda. :P It's like he wants to bring himself to let her know his feelings for her, but he's too shy to do so. :)

(Jimmy ran a hand through his hair, trying to look casual and cool, and most likely just messing up his hair.) Haha, this made me chuckle! He's trying to be the cool dude, but he's just making things worse for himself. :P

("So," Jimmy said, racking his mind for something to ask Romilda. ) Haha, he seems pretty awkard around the women. :P This must be mortifying for him.

A piece of critique- (At this point in time, they were sitting in the Room of Requirement, waiting for their turns to practice dueling, "What do you want to do after Hogwarts?" ) The comma after 'dueling' should be a full stop. :) Also, 'he finally settled on' might make more sense as ' he finally said', since 'he finally settled on' doesn't make too much sense to me. :)
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VICKY FROBISHER

Ah, I think I know what Vicky's been up to...: P

Vicky seems the type that doesn't like to be told that what she's doing is wrong, even though she seems to know in the back of her mind that maybe what she is doing isn't the best thing to be doing. :)

(She was disheveled, her hair a mess, her pajamas rumpled and wrinkled, her body still a bit sweaty and warm. ) I like how you describe 'what she's been up to' discreetly, and don't make it overly obvious. :)
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BLAISE ZABINI

It's cool to see how all of the different character
burning happiness chapter 1 . 1/27/2013
Wow... That was really amazing. I truly loved it, especially the last section. It seemed like it was a beautiful conclusion to the story, and I adored reading about the characters that I didn't know about. You came up with a wonderful section for each character. Amazing.
-littlemissreadaholic
The Crownless Queen chapter 1 . 1/27/2013
So many minor characters... I didn't know half of them but this was absolutely awesome :p I think my favorite were Rose, Astoria and Lisa, but they really were all good :) That idea, to do so many little snapshots about the lives during that year was really amzing and i love how you did it :p
00982374-deactivated chapter 1 . 1/27/2013
This was brilliant. You've done such an amazing job of characterizing those minor characters that aren't or are barely mentioned. I think my favourite sections (sections, because I just couldn't choose one) would have to be Owen Cauldwell, Lisa Turpin, Hestia Carrow and Rose Zeller. Because Owen reminded me so much of the Marauders, when Stephen told Lisa to run I swear, I stopped breathing for a second and of course Rose...she was so sweet to help out the first year. And then Hestia...I felt so bad for her when she had to perform the cruciatus curse...so horrible. I really enjoyed reading this, I'm definitely favouriting it!
The Original Horcrux chapter 1 . 1/26/2013
Wow.
I am just completely speechless, this was AMAZING! I actually can't express how much I loved this. I loved how you told the story of the year with different people and I loved the fact that all of them were Canon characters. That was a beautiful touch. I loved how Rose Zeller stole potions from Madam Pomfrey, I love how Lisa and Stephen ran away from school (I'm assuming because there were snatchers) and Stephen died at the hands of them and Lisa felt as though she'd lost her innocence (Oh and question. Is that Lisa the same Lisa who Su Li was in love with? Because if that's the case then is Su Li's crush and Su Li's crusher on the run together?)

My favourite section was definitely the last. It was so strong and emotional and I freaking cried. I'm just looking back up at it now and It's still making me cry! This was so amazing, Jess. Keep up the amazing work and DFTBA!
HedwigBlack chapter 1 . 1/21/2013
I love the way you went through the whole year. It's interesting to see the gradual changes in Hogwarts from the beginning to the end through different perspectives. I think my favorite was Mandy's and Jack's. I don't know why but those stuck out to me the most. I think Mandy seeing everything that was going on but keeping quiet was wonderful because I think people don't realize how useful it is to be that kind of person. How it's not a bad thing to be observant. I also liked Jack's because it's such an innocent moment, I think. Just talking and not being able to say what he really wanted to say. This whole thing was beautifully written though. Nice job!
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