|Reviews for Triptych|
| taerkitty chapter 1 . 1/4/2013
I won't complain about your ... ahem ... academic ethics if you don't. ;)
That aside, this is a workmanlike narration of the first three episodes from the cyborgs' perspectives. It's good, and there are no obvious errors in spelling, grammar, tense. These may be little errors, but, if present, they get in the way of the story. They're not present here, so it reads very well.
As for the story, it doesn't bring anything new aside from retelling it at kid-eye-level. It's accurate (or as much as translations allow - Hilshire/Hilscher and Corporation/Agency are easily understandable and interchanged.)
As fanfiction, we have the luxury of not needing to explain a lot of the backstory. I'm surprised the teacher didn't wonder about the background, why kids were being used as assassins. I guess the fact they're cyborgs really didn't factor into this.
In closing, it's good, but there doesn't seem to be anything new in it. Yeah, I know, it's three years old. Looking forward to subsequent work from you.
| Thescarredman chapter 1 . 12/26/2012
Welcome to the site.
You have your fundamentals down: spelling and grammar, which are key to creating an entertaining story, yet often lacking in fanfiction. The paraphrase doesn't tell much about you ability to create an original story from canon, though. Give us a story of your own, soon.