Reviews for Curiosity
Ular Tua chapter 1 . 6/16/2013
Doctor Guile, eh? A very unique idea, and you know, I love such thing! Anatomy is also fitting to Guile's WandaIn tech, and the page he is currently viewing fits that tech very well. Love it, and how realistic it is, when he says that doctors are devoted to lifelong learning!
Guile Mustang chapter 1 . 5/22/2013
I love this! Only in such a fairly short piece, you have successfully portrayed Guile as a multi-dimensional character, and extremely in character with the canon! I think his portrayal is realistic, especially about his responsibility to take care of a patient's health. Never played Chrono Trigger, but I think...I'll try to find the copy soon.
Heh, Serge is so innocent. Can't say he is IC or OOC, because he lacks of reaction upon seeing something in the game. However, if it's me too, I'll just make him like Guilmon, innocent and funny, yet badass. :) His last line is heartwarming too.
Note: not Guil(e)mon, because Guilmon doesn't fit that name, unless it is 'Guileless' instead of 'Guile' in the context... Sorry, out of topic. XD
guilefan chapter 1 . 5/5/2013
Guile was a...doctor? That's a win! A truly fantastic idea I must say, and I love how this ties with his WandaIn tech!
E-Sushi chapter 1 . 1/20/2013
A short one-shot, and it's pretty good. Despite being fandom-blind (and knowing almost nothing about them), I can still understand the story pretty well. I like how you added thoughts here and there. It really helps project the person's thoughts. Though slightly confusing at first, everything became clear mid-way through the story. Just some errors like 'Guile had asked and released Serge's right hand.' It'll be better if you use simple past.

Things that can be improved - more detail. Describe more. 'Noises of slippers hitting the floor echoed as Serge walked.' walked on what exactly? Wooden floorboards? Marble tiles? :) Keep it up.
StormRex Lancer chapter 1 . 1/16/2013
This is a very touching story :) Guile's guilt when he cocked up in healing a patient's wound, made him feel guilty. His perseverance despite the odds is admirable, realizing that one screw-up isn't the end, and it made me admire him the same way that Serge does. Very well done :)
gfhdjs chapter 1 . 1/9/2013
firstly i want to say this story is well written i like your style of writing, although i know nothing of this fandom, i found it very easy to follow the story and the description made it quite easy for me to picture the scene with out any trouble, despite this chapter been quite short and me not been familiar with the fandom, it was great to have some back story to the character Guile.

i dint notice any spelling errors, if there are any they are minimal and don't affect the flow of the story.

i love this part (I realize that one mistake isn't the end of everything) its such a powerful sentence and you delivered it perfectly
ReadingBlueWolf chapter 1 . 12/29/2012
Okay, your writing has improved so much from the beginning. I love the details you use, like the shuffling of slippers, and things like the wooden door. Its really so neat to see how far your writing has grown and how much you've improved. My hat's off to you. It's amazing. I enjoyed the flow of this story. It was a quick read because of that. I enjoyed the relationship between Guile and Serge. That was really nice. You showed they have history together, but I also enjoyed Serge's final thoughts at the end. It really solidifies the friendship they have. He only wants the best for him. I thought that was nicely done. I loved what Guile said about one mistake not being the end of everything. That was well written and well placed. Great job on this!
BlondieLocks chapter 1 . 12/25/2012
Ahhh, the more you know! I really got to play Chrono Trigger, it's my list of RPG's to hit up.

Anyway, you're one-shots are always nice in that they usually have some sort of message at the end. In this case, I feel like you did a nice job at showing Sereg's attachment to his new traveller by friend by describing his eyes as getting wet, and handled his coming to terms with the possibility of Guile leaving some day nicely, since he reflected such a sweet sentiment at the end with wishing him well as a doctor.

My only gripe is that sometimes, I feel like you characterize Serge a little too child-like sometimes, but I know his personality is entirely open to interpretation (seeing as he is a silent protagonist) and this could be the way you percieve him.

You always have a fabulous handle on Guile though, and it is always a pleasure to read into the different lives you spin for him, so nice job, this was fun to read.
persevera chapter 1 . 12/25/2012
This was an enjoyable character study. Guile revealed his past and something about his present too, with his calm attitude about Serge being in his room.
I like that he was shown returning to the text when Serge left the room.
This was a little awkward. [He wore his slippers and ran towards the entrance door]-You might change it to something like he ran toward the entrance in his slippered feet.
This was the best descriptive paragraph. [Turning around, Serge saw a green-eyed man in white pajamas. His long lavender hair was swaying like the waves atop the ocean.]
Edhla chapter 1 . 12/25/2012
I had to laugh at Serge's "What kind of a novel is this?" LOL. :D

I note that your one-shots all have a fairly similar structure, in that you open with a beautiful image, and then by the end of the one-shot you're generally in dialogue-territory. It was lovely to see Guile and Serge again, though I kind of missed Kid, I must admit! :) The conversation between Guile and Serge about Guile's medical past did strike me as a little bit of an "Info Dump", but to be honest, the story Guile was telling was interesting and drew me in so I didn't really care. :) There's something very raw and childlike about some of the dialogue which really appeals to me, and it seems to stretch across most of your work. Lovely.

Lovely work as always, and I hope you're having a festive day/evening :)
Aeci chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
This was a wonderful one-shot. Firstly, I loved the little guessing-game Serge was going through as he tried to figure out what Guile was up to. It was funny how he kept thinking he was sure of Guile's whereabouts until he was proven wrong, over and over again - first he thought Guile was doing something in his room because of the bright light, then he thought Guile was in the bathroom…

The little bit of history about Guile being a doctor, and wanting to become one again, was well-written and provided lots of characterization. I also have to point out that I loved Guile's statement of "doctors are devoted to lifelong learning" - this couldn't be truer, and it was a very poignant thing for Guile to say considering his past.

However, I do think the fact that Guile's reading the book contradicts his line "dwelling on my past won't do any good." I'd personally consider reading the book to be dwelling on his past, so that line being there doesn't make any sense to me. I've also noticed you've used Serge and Guile's names a lot - almost in every line. It's good for identifying who's speaking, but it might benefit the story if you used a few more pronouns instead of just names.

But other than that, this was a nicely-written story. Good job.
Tune4Toons chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
Well, it's sure been a while since I've seen your stuff, and lemme say! Definitely have grown since you came to RLt. XD Just to disclaim, my knowledge of Crono Cross is pretty slim to none.

I like the mood you set up with the dim lightbulbs and the slippers and his thoughts. Sounds like this isnt the first time he's tried that either. Haha and he's creeping through someone else's room, curiosity for sure. Yeah, what kind of novel is that? Heh, even without seeing Guile yet, we get a nice feel for the kind of person he is from the stuff we see in his room; nice work. Oh Serge, he reminds me a lot of a thief-like kind of guy for some reason though, with his motive and all. And a nice piece of backstory too. :)

[he's so exaggerating with the lights] Not sure what you meant here though; the wording's off.

[Serge could push the door open. … Serge gasped. … Serge gulped]

I think the only main thing I have to comment on is how you wouldn't need to have a person's name mentioned so many times, especially if its only one person or if the same person's name is mentioned several times, but close together (as readers would still be able to tell that the same person is doing all these actions), so it'd be fine to use some pronouns like [he] with the person's name used every so often.

Overall, I like what you did here. Some nice descriptions, clear motives, a nice display of characters (especially when they seem so different from one another, Guile sounds intimidating haha). Hope that helps! Cheers!

Tune
Sierraoscar154 chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
Aw, poor Serge, he was kinda cute in this chapter, although I feel like he was just a catalyst for what we see in Guile here. I have a feeling alot of the biological/anatomy stuff in here might be related to your own interests, hmm? Either way, it was interesting to see Guile on a bunch of different levels; he was openly condescending and hostile at first to Serge here, but he lightened up for the most part as the story progressed. Well, if you can call his cold demeanor like that anyway, but it just shows how he has alot more interests and how there's just so much more to this guy that he gives off. Finally, I liked how Serge wished him luck at the end; that was a really nice touch, and a nice way to end this little story off.
SkyWideOpen chapter 1 . 12/23/2012
Quite a nice character exploration, this. For a short piece, Guile is a surprisingly multilayered character - at once slightly menacing and certainly worthy of the fear he induces in Serge, yet scarred by the trauma of his past and still leaning towards that most noble of profession. Creates a nice duality - very, very dangerous and uses his medical knowledge for rather violent ends, but still a doctor at heart. The use of the book itself as a hook to the past is very suitable, too, and the moment at the end where Serge sees Guile still reading the book is quite a nice touch. Well-written piece as well - though if I make one suggestion, it's that Serge seems to be thinking with a great deal of exclamation marks. Maybe have a look at that. Otherwise, though, nicely done.
Anonymous chapter 1 . 12/23/2012
I have to admit that...this is a very excellent work! Yeah, Guile could be a doctor in the past, seeing his white outfit... It's so true! Hah, WandaIn and anatomy - these two tied up so neatly! No wonder why that spell always deal three digits damage in the game although it's still in the early part of the game... ;)
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