Reviews for The Lucky One
A00000000000000023 chapter 3 . 12/26/2012
Aww that was so sweet I liked the end when he gave her the collar something so simple was soo sweet. I think Paul's personality is kinda...idk really. I haven't seen a lot of interaction with him so its hard to tell. But so far it seems good. Really good chapter though I liked it. Your main character doesn't seem like a Mary-Sue anymore i can see her personality starting to show a little bit. Anyways loved this chapter update soon.
HalcyonSeasons chapter 3 . 12/26/2012
The flower talk made me feel all fuzzy. I was like, "SQUEEE!" I cannot wait for when and how Holly finds out Paul imprinted, and her reaction. This chapter was so great to the plot, and as always, it was a joy beta-reading it. I can't wait for the next one, lovie. :)
OPOSOJOJ chapter 2 . 12/25/2012
I was kind of confused by what was going on in that chapter...
HalcyonSeasons chapter 2 . 12/25/2012
(I don't care if it's weird; I'm still gonna review this.)
This chapter was good. Like, really good. Holly doesn't have the makings of a Mary Sue in my opinion, and even if she did, I wouldn't care because it's your story and you can do whatever you want.
Aside from the Holly talk, Paul in this chapter was fucking great. The way he acted was very... imprint-y (eh, not a word) and the way he was described was so intricate. I am so ready for the next chapter.
Loula Lahote chapter 2 . 12/25/2012
Great job on everything. Can't wait to read more.
A00000000000000023 chapter 2 . 12/25/2012
Really good chapter I don't think she's that much of a mary sue i mean just don't make it where she feels nothing but at the same time okay this is a boy who could, might be on drugs just don't have her falling all over him like a fan girl. Yeah Paul's hot an if he got lost in my room he would never leave but at the same time its like come on control yourself. So just in my opinion make sure there's a balance you know. But hell this your OC so make her however you want to as long as she doesn't become a love sick mindless puppy aka Bella Swan I'm cool. Anyways good chapter hope you update soon
Loula Lahote chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
I LIKE IT SO FAR. I don't find that she is mary-sueish. She seems like a normal teenage girl. She doesn't seem like she's stuck up or self obsessed or think her shit doesn't stink or she's above everbody else. Or that she is like oh my gawd, like i'm so hot and unobtainable! ugh! or that she's like a black belt in karate or an elite gymnast. Or that like omygawd like all the guys wanna do me! UGH! or that she is the so called perfect, like really short and like really skinny, like anorexic skinny, with curves in all the right places( how does that even happen). And hopefully she isn't a rich white girl living on a native american rez or just a spoled rich girl UGHHH! ... So those are the type of things i find mary - sueish!
HalcyonSeasons chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
That was a nice start! And I don't think of Holly as very Sue-ish; I already find her better than Bella, and that's great already. I can't wait to see what you do with Holly.
And I've gotta go with the crowd; I want more, too. ;)
OPOSOJOJ chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
I want more.
A00000000000000023 chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
It sounds really good so far i really like it. I don't really know what your main characters name is but shes funny. Please continue.
scigeekgirl chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
I like it so far. Can't wait to see what happens next.
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