|Reviews for Checkmate|
| Vyrazhi chapter 77 . 5/12/2014
Tyna's comment to Mags, beginning with "He was born too beautiful", is a magnificent analogy to the story of Adam and Eve. They ate the forbidden fruit, which was the knowledge of good and evil, and were fallen afterward. Finnick may be a victor, but just like the pair in the Garden of Eden, he knows too much - about the Capitol, the Hunger Games, murder, and life. It's no wonder that Tyna is bitter about not being able to reach him. She's his mother, yet might as well be a stranger to Finnick.
"Liars are lonely people." This reminds me of a contestant named Tony on SURVIVOR. He's in the final five who have a shot at earning a million dollars, but he's made too many promises to too many people. No one feels like they can rely upon him - rightly - and so Tony is a lone wolf. Even though the members of his own alliance are too scared to vote him off the island, they still don't trust him as far as they can throw him. Several contestants are trying to turn the tables on Tony by lying boldly to him...
"Mags is very, very clever and very influent." "Influent" may be a word in French, but not English.
Nevaeh. (LOL) In one of my earliest SYOTs, a submission for a tribute had that exact same name. Her submitter wanted her to be a wealthy, whiny, and witless twelve-year-old from District One. Nevaeh was absolutely hilarious to write (and kill off). Heaven she was not, rather a rugrat from Hell.
| grandvizier527 chapter 13 . 5/12/2014
I don't really see why the others are so mad at Lila. I didn't particularly care for Anli and the Scavengers (they seemed to just get in the way and be another obstacle at first) but I didn't hate them. And besides, Lila has valuable information about the "arena", so they should listen to her! And of course Constantine wouldn't like her due to the fact that she's from 11 (and she hates him because she remembers how much of an asshole he was for no reason).
I'd like to see Lila's POV soon!
| grandvizier527 chapter 12 . 5/11/2014
I kind of had a feeling this was what was going on around the time when they got into the sewers (and not back out or any closer to the Capitol in later chapters). What I'd love to know is the brilliant Gamemaker that came up with this idea! I have a theory as to why they might have done it, though: since all the tributes are children of rebels and might still cling to a hope that they can fight back against the Capitol (like Mags), they want to put them in the ruins and declare, "You want to rebel? Ok, go join these crazy sewer people! Don't like them? Then go join the cannibals!" and so forth. But it seems that since Mags regards them as human and perversions of her own ideals, she still manages to see them as human.
But I have a few questions: How exactly did Fife figure out that her "future visions" or dreams or whatever were actually repressed memories? And why is her reaction to this so panicked while the others don't seem to have much of a reaction at all? Is it because Fife is only just beginning to realize the Capitol's true power, or is it because she has to kill her new friends?
| grandvizier527 chapter 11 . 5/11/2014
So, if my reading was correct, Fife likes to take advantage of the older generations' weakness and submission (from the rebellion) and uses it to get away with selling stuff (and she doesn't have any competition because everyone else is too afraid of the Peacekeepers). It's a great strategy for Fife to survive while everyone else is stuck in the past (Mags seems to be this way a bit, what with volunteering to give her family and District some dignity), but I have this feeling that if she were never reaped then her business wouldn't last for too long (since by Katniss' time everyone would sort of have accepted Capitol rule and not known anything else).
| grandvizier527 chapter 10 . 5/11/2014
So there are actually two groups of Citadel people, plus the Scavengers?
| grandvizier527 chapter 8 . 5/11/2014
I'll be honest, I'm a tad impatient for the Hunger Games (I swear I'm turning into a Captiolite from reading all these Hunger Games fanfics!) but Mags and co.'s time in the Citadel is really cool because we get to see all sorts of points of view of humanity that can possibly be held in their universe. We have Constantine, Mags herself, Fife, the cannibals, the rebels, the Capitol...and yet as you've said in your AN everyone has this flawed view of the world based on their upbringings. But who was the idiot that flamed this? It's well-written and obviously meant to reflect the CHARACTERS' views, not yours.
The Citadel rebels, BTW, remind me of President Coin and District 13's society; they may not be the Capitol, but they still have a rather cruel and immoral way of looking at things (I know morality's subjective and whatnot but you get what I mean). The District 13 guys didn't seem to want to overthrow President Snow for any reason except for the fact that Coin wanted his power (they didn't seem to care much about improving everybody else's lives). The Citadel rebels just seem to want to survive and live away from the Capitol's influence, but their primitive underground society is just not the way humans were meant to live.
| Well of wishes chapter 77 . 5/11/2014
Panem is unmanageable. How can you block the borders when your whole reserve army is barely ten thousand? They can send hordes of mutts and homeguards all gun blazing on the cities, but the Capitol isn't equipped for a siege. Especially on Four since they have no ships (lol.)
So the Capitol is stuck. Either Snow backs off and allows Mags back or he starts killing them all. He could try to discredit Mags but I think it's too late now, everyone would expect it. He could round up Mags' relatives and blackmail her, but then I expect Glynn to find a way to make it backfire.
I love reading about Finnick's transition to the victor's world. It's horrible because Finnick actually has it easy, compared to the other victors (except maybe Careers).
Obtaining the Capitol's support through money rather than playing the moral card is lovely. Nevaeh is such a tool.
| grandvizier527 chapter 5 . 5/10/2014
I love the big tyranny vs. anarchy/rebellion question undertones in this chapter. I hope I get to see Fife's POV soon, though. I'm as curious as Mags as to why she's so callous and secretive, as opposed to the rather prideful Constantine.
| grandvizier527 chapter 4 . 5/10/2014
Good to see Constantine's POV! I thought this would just be all about Mags, but now we get to see that the allegedly rich heir has an interesting side to him. He seems to sort of see himself as a Robin Hood of sorts, kidnapping abused children. That activity seems really morally ambiguous, IMO, since his intentions are good but it's still obviously a crime (and most people in real life that kidnap children have...well, have more base intentions for them). And I think it's intriguing how he obviously has a crush on Mags, but she's sort of lost whatever feelings she had for him in the previous chapters.
| grandvizier527 chapter 1 . 5/9/2014
This first chapter really captured Mags' character well. Since she was an old woman by the time of the books, we really had no idea what she was like. But since she was obviously a child during the rebellion, then it would make sense for her to have some of that rebellious resolve against the Capitol as she goes into the Games. I also like how her Games marks the beginning of a transition from punishment of the rebels' children to entertainment for the Capitol. But if everybody knows who Mags' parents are/were, then wouldn't they just rig the reapings to force her into the Games (so that she wouldn't even have to volunteer?)
| Supernova18 chapter 77 . 5/7/2014
I have no words. To be honest, I've read stories better written (even if I love how you write, don't take it badly.), but you make stories with plots so complex I wonder how you do it.
Mags' helplessness is raw and I'm frustrated along with her. Finnick and the other victors are really sweet but it really feels like the calm before the storm.
| melliemoo chapter 77 . 5/6/2014
I like seeing how the rebellion is beginning in earnest.
| Lollipop chapter 77 . 5/6/2014
Boom. It's going to go boom. I just feel it in my bones, lol.
Does Chelsea teach Finn sign language because she's better at it and it's a nice way to bond or because Mags actually doesn't know it (or is less fluent?). It'd be weird for Mags not to know.
I'm curious about that Capitol Sergeant, Anytos. Why would Snow sent a decent guy to guard Mags. Why not a Sergeant that would make her life difficult (like Fudge sent Umbridge in Harry Potter)? He'd just have to promise the guy he'd make him Captain or something.
| Rendered Thoughts chapter 76 . 5/6/2014
Poor Finnick. He plays his cards really well, though - even though he needed guidance and a bit (or a lot) of drugs to help. I feel sad for him, for he's so young, but for someone his age, he is also very acute and intelligent, and I see the glimpses of cunning in him already.
I'm scared for Glynn now. How long will it take before she is too discovered? Judging they won't discover Plutarch for a while, Glynn is safe until at least the 75th... but I don't know, really.
And yes, I agree with you, there is no white and black in an uprising. Everyone is a shade of gray, and people will align to those who they identify with and whom they believe will do good for their own future. I enjoy and appreciate your take in the rebellion :)
| ETNRL4L chapter 77 . 5/5/2014
10,000 words? Are you high? I know I've done worse, but it was a bloody one-shot, not a freaking chapter.
I don't even know how I'm going to tackle this review. I'm just going to read and remark on whatever catches my eye...
Crap, poor Finnick. I don't blame his parents, though. The Capitols prepares no one for dealing with PTSD- not even victors.
Awwww! Cereus and Mags are cute when they plot together. By the way, not sure if I've ever mentioned this, but you leave way to much up to the reader to infer in your writing. I couldn't understand half of the conversation Mags and Cereus just had.
Gilly's an insane cat lady? And a hoarder?
Okay. Chelsea's not okay.
Was Ms. Rivers kinda flirting with the major a little? LOL!
That thing with Nevaeh was inspired. Make Capitolites lose money. We'll see how Snow handles that!
The Avox Conspiracy... tun, tun, tunnnn! LOL!