|Reviews for Kiss The Cook|
| autobotlover chapter 1 . 12/7/2014
| DjinniFires chapter 1 . 1/24/2013
Hi! Visiting from WA review game.
Overall, it's sweet and cute.
The dialogue at the beginning contains some unnecessary back-and-forths that can be cut down. If Mako had a horrible day at work (rather than "I'm not complaining"), then Mina's thoughtfulness would mean more to her.
The point-of-view changes from Minako to Makoto when the latter arches her eyebrow. Mina can't be aware of that over the telephone! You could be more strongly in Mina's point-of-view elsewhere by providing some sense of her internal reactions, i.e., "She could feel her cheeks getting warm," rather than just "Makoto slightly blushed."
If the humor is Mina's inability to cook, then go for it, i.e., not just "soup" but "canned soup"; mention another non-cook's choice or two (ramen?); have the grilled sandwich be slightly burned. Rather than Mako finding the sandwich to actually be good, say "It tastes good knowing that you made it." Just my thoughts!
| Neanda chapter 1 . 1/9/2013
Aww, that was loveable and silly and weirdly romantic all at once. XP That moment I saw 'Minako' and 'cook', I had a Nurse Minako flashback. But it went better than expected! I mean, nothing got burned down, the food was edible...that's no mean feat for her. XD My only complaint is that you didn't write the massage. Do want!
| Joanna-NK chapter 1 . 1/6/2013
Well a nice Minako/Makoto story is always welcome :D Just them in an evening during them living together. And making a sandwich isn't really much of a cooking...but since it's Minako i guess it's cooking for her xD
Nice job and keep 'em comming ;D
| Beth Cyra chapter 1 . 1/6/2013
A very sweet night for just the two. I Like how despite her trying to be romantic it was just a simple sandwhich, it was cute but also felt very in character.
I liked the ending as well.