|Reviews for So that the world might be mended|
| Guest chapter 31 . 10/5/2015
Absolutely fucking beautiful, I love this story
| Guest chapter 5 . 9/19/2015
This seems really boring!
| cra0007 chapter 31 . 7/31/2015
All I can say is that this is the most beautiful story I've ever read im truly happy I got to read this such a bittersweet ending as well I loved it in word's I cant describe the characters The Demon Slayer, The Maiden In Black, Yuria, Yurt, Ostrava and Biorr I really felt like I was there I really don't think im going to read a story that will ever top this im quite melancholy to see it end.
| mirajane-fan chapter 31 . 7/12/2015
oh, my God! What an incredible story it is, i can't believe how addicted to it I was. It would made a great movie, or better said, TV series. Thank you so much for this mesmerizing journey and I hope to read another captivating story from you as soon is possible.
I wish you the best and lot of inspiration.
| TLau18 chapter 31 . 6/30/2015
This story obviously deserves more views than it currently has. This is no amaetur story but a well written masterpiece that could tie with The Fifth Act of Final Fantasy, Tiberium Wars and could even sell as a real life novel for it's contents. The author makes very original and yet believable backstories for each of these characters ranging from villians to the well known Maiden in Black (poor girl). I MUST urge you to read this story if you are reading this post. Even if you do not know Demon Souls this story is a must in your collection of favorites. Simply astounding that I managed to find a story as beautiful as this in such a dusty and empty part of Fanfiction.
Well done Maichen, I hope you will write more stories in the future, for I will be as eager to read as I had on this story. Goodluck!
| forgotten22968 chapter 31 . 5/17/2015
This is art. Simply amazing work! I loved aaaaall of this, except when you killed off Yuria.(That shit hit me.) Still, i cant hold my opinion over this story too harshly because like i said before, this is art.
| crimsonninja117 chapter 31 . 5/5/2015
wow amazing story!
| nivlac chapter 31 . 2/11/2015
This was amazing, thank you for writing this, I almost cried at the end. I really do think that you can become a great author, so keep it up, and don't let anyone keep you down, good luck.
| 5 Coloured Walker chapter 31 . 11/4/2014
A great story, one well worth reading, not just by Demon's Souls fans. The characters are used well, and the time travelling section is... Well, awesome in many ways is the only way to put it.
On the nitpicky side:
Errors in the form of grammar, formatting, and using the wrong name exist in the story [Being complete though, I've not a list of them. But you mentioned Eyestones, three times in a row, which aren't something that exist, I believe you meant the Keystones, perhaps it was a find/replace error?]. This doesn't including the old English, which I'd have no clue for, I was born in 1995, not 1495. The Valley of defilement section was a little confusing and the story could use some formatting changes to better show where perspective shifts, but there is where it's most notable because there is one case where it's formatted and that's where perspectives first begin shifting. It's particularly annoying as you can't really tell until halfway through the first sentence or two, which is confusing. Finally the killing of the old king is kind of a plot hole, because the Nameless was prophesied [5 will come, 3 will die, two will fight. Well, no, that didn't happen.], and yet it's then said he can't be prophesied for.
| Fierdin chapter 31 . 10/29/2014
This is one of the most amazing things I have ever read. There is really nothing more to be said.
| Pensive Rumination Observer chapter 31 . 10/23/2014
Okay, I haven't even played Demon's Souls (or Dark Souls for that matter) but I can tell this fic is AMAZING.
The ending is incredibly fitting from what I've heard of the DS series and the lead up to it had some very surprising twists which just fit together perfectly. Bravo.
This was truly a pleasure to read.
I don't usually read much online original fiction, but if your this good at writing them I'm definitely going to give "Anazia" a shot.
| Jack of Blade's Daughter chapter 31 . 10/8/2014
Good, though to be perfectly honest that's all the last chapter was. Just good, not great. Understandably it was rushed I guess, having your actual published work to do.
| Jacc Krowe chapter 31 . 8/31/2014
This remains one of my single favorite stories, and part of me is sad to see it end.
I like the changes to each character's role in the world. Biorr felt like a legendary, hulking colossus, and Mephistopheles a cold assassin. All of the characters transcended their roles in the game, which for a game that's so vague and heavy on lore, is a real accomplishment.
And I love, absolutely love, your interpretation of the Old One, and their God. I think that the ending was a perfect ending for a story based around Demon's Souls. It felt like there needed to be more, there deserved to be more. But at the same time, it felt like there shouldn't be more. I don't quite know how to say it, except from start to finish, I loved this story.
| XcelltasticX chapter 31 . 8/26/2014
Im gone for one week and everything happens while Im not there. Really wanted to be there when it ends. Nevertheless, Im here so lets review this bad boy!
The last two chapters were a very fitting end. They had nice conclusions for every character and even went along the lines of their canon counterparts. Some were cheesy though that did little to dampen the mood or throw over the build up. The scene in which the False King drains Nameless and Ostrava is a good example. Both of them are being chocked and have their talk with the villain. It got more ridiculous by the sentence. Then the elevator was heard. The suspense basically skyrocketed with the word 'bing'. I clearly remember putting down my phone and taking a breather when that happened. Furthermore, I think this might be your pattern. Up and down like a rollercoaster. It works well enough indeed.
The dialog between the Old One and the archdemon was a great idea in hindsight. They said that Nameless was a wildcard to some extent. I think this idea is very intruiging. It makes me look at the game in a different light. Your entire story did that; I didnt believe that it could offer so MUCH depth. Quite astonishing really.
Character development also picked up a great deal for Nameless. I was expecting a sad ending maybe even with his suicide. To see him go after the only thing he has now instead of reverting to his depressed state is pleasant. Thanks to this story, I noticed how the Maiden shows her character through her acts and not her dialog. Like how she sometimes sits near the archstone you went through last and how she sometimes stands near Thomas but not really near anyone else.
I have yet to finish Demon's Souls though I will like your ending the best. Oddly enough, there isnt much I have to say about this. I thought I would go into a gigantic rant on it. To be left speechless is somewhat annoying. I wanted to to truly say what I would have in mind but nothing stands out. This is really the only story that can make me shut up. You have something in your writing that simply satisfies me. Maybe that gives you a hint on Im trying to say because I cannot find the right words.
Well, it has been a fun ride, hasnt it? Do you mind letting me know when you publish a book? Ill buy it for sure regardless; just dont wanna find it a year after publication.
This is all I have to say.
| masamunexyamato chapter 31 . 8/25/2014
I just wanted to say that this was one of the best fanfictions of demon souls and dark souls that I have had the pleasure of reading. I can only hope that you can write more in this series.