Reviews for Nerdmance
chuck101 chapter 5 . 12/13/2015
I can't believe I've just discovered this story! It's AWESOME!
I don't even have the words to tell you how amazing it is! Your Shepard and Joker are brilliant and very much on point, and the way their relationship evolves is completely adorable and very touching. I love your story, I'm very happy to have found it!
MissLizziebeth chapter 5 . 3/27/2015
So cute :] That was a lovely little story! Keep writing xxx
Jayne chapter 3 . 4/13/2014
The Firefly reference made me do a spit-take. Well done!
Oratorio chapter 5 . 2/23/2014
Love this, I adore Joker and you got him just right here. Sweet and sexy.
Guest chapter 5 . 6/19/2013
Oh god, this was everything I wanted in a follow-up to ME3. Really dialed in Shoker characterization!
Saiyuri007 chapter 5 . 3/23/2013
Yea! So adorable
ivanesca chapter 5 . 3/18/2013
I needed to stop reading few times because my heart was melting
Holy grenade of antioch, i love this.
ivanesca chapter 4 . 3/17/2013
God i need to log in eventually but i also need to review this because everything you write is canon and it's raining over my face (second ffiction that made me cry you can be proud) and everything hurts
Mordinette chapter 5 . 3/19/2013
This was sweet and hot, a perfect ending to a wonderful story.

I loved that he was thinking about having a future with her:

He sat back in the seat, his guts in one big knot of anticipation. The stiff and insistent hard-on he was sporting made it difficult to concentrate on anything other than the fact that she'd be up here soon, and that there were no missions or wars or psychotic bad guys to get between them anymore. They had all night, and every night after that to be together. That his thoughts had branched out from lust to the possibility of a future with her was both surprising and exciting despite his natural tendency to scoff at everything even remotely resembling sunshine and bunnies.

This was sweet and hot:

"I . . . don't think you ever, uh, mentioned it, no." His mouth couldn't seem to form words in its usual easy manner, not with Shepard looking at him like that. Especially not when she swung her leg over his and straddled him, her hair in her reddening face, and started unbuttoning his shirt. It took him a minute to remember he had hands at the ends of his arms, but then he went around behind her and pulled down the zipper of her dress. The teeth opened one by one, each one a staccato bump as it separated and revealed her warm, bare, scarred skin. Once his shirt was open, she raised her arms and let him lift the dress up and off, and then there was no force on earth or elsewhere that could have kept him from her.

And I loved this:

While she was a powerhouse on the battlefield and a force to be reckoned with to every other soul in the galaxy, here with him she was just Shepard, the woman beneath the warrior, and his heart suddenly felt too big for his chest.

This was so sweet:

She left a trail of clothes to the bathroom and spent most of the shower running her hands over her body, remembering the way he'd touched her. Her head was light and giddy and she leaned against the wall, giggling, with her hands clasped over her mouth. It had been an eternity since she'd been so happy.

I loved that she could be so cute and so human.

It's wonderful to know that now they are going to have a future together. I couldn't agree more with Joker:

They had all the time in the world to get to know each other all over again and that, Joker thought, was pretty fucking awesome.
Abionastar50 chapter 5 . 3/19/2013
I just melted n hid in a corner this chapter was unbevialbly awesome, the plot n dialogue ahh. A steaming scene but oh my u captured really well n may I say stupendous
Suilven chapter 5 . 3/19/2013
They had sex in his pilot's chair! Woo! :D :D :D

I'm pretty sure that I was incoherent for a good ten minutes after reading this (and then reading it again... and possibly again). I would admit how many times I've read the other chapters, too, but then I would have to go huddle in a corner from embarrassment. *blush*

This is my favourite Shoker story ever - truly.

""Have I ever mentioned how much I like that chair?" she asked, pushing away from the wall and sauntering over to him. Her eyes were dark and smoldering with her intentions. "Or how many times I fantasized about you and I in it?""

Um... oh, hell yes!

Loved this:

"It took him a minute to remember he had hands at the ends of his arms, but then he went around behind her and pulled down the zipper of her dress. The teeth opened one by one, each one a staccato bump as it separated and revealed her warm, bare, scarred skin."

Adored the notion that he would feel this way:

"Joker wasn't aware that he was waiting for something until it didn't happen—that momentary pang of anxiety that came from giving control of his body over to someone else. With his condition, he had to be aware of every move he made, had to know what was happening around him at all times. When he gave a woman permission to touch him, she usually didn't understand the gravity of that decision. He didn't ever just jump into bed with someone, because he had to be sure that he wouldn't wind up in the hospital at the end of the night. On two (very memorable) occasions, that had happened anyway.

Shepard, though . . . she was different. It wasn't just because the bones of his lower half, and part of his upper half, were made of metal now. In their jobs, they had developed a huge amount of trust in each other—she depended on him to fly her through impossible situations, and he depended on her to lead him home again. With her, he could give all of himself without holding back."

Laughed out loud at this:

""God, Joker, is this really happening?" She stroked his cheeks, her fingers scraping lightly through his beard, and searched his face like he might disappear at any moment. "You might have to pinch me, because I can't believe this is real." He grinned, did as she said, and she squealed and twisted in his lap. "I meant on my arm, not my ass!""

I'll be in my bunk:

"He tried to tell her that he was close, and that this was the best he'd ever felt in his life, but all that came out was an incomprehensible series of desperate vowel sounds."

I love the thought of her padding back to Joker's house after in her bare feet, too.

Finally, this:

""Of course, I've always loved it." She went still and quiet for a beat, then snuggled into him and threw her arm over him. He replayed what he'd said and realized he'd made one crucial slip.

You, he'd said. 'I've always loved you.' He could have made a joke and made excuses about being tired and not really knowing what he was saying, but that wouldn't make that statement any less true. He could let it stand for now; that was a conversation for tomorrow, and all the tomorrows after that. They had all the time in the world to get to know each other all over again and that, Joker thought, was pretty fucking awesome."

Melt, melt, puddle, puddle, goo, goo.

Thank you sooo much for writing this. Loved it to little squishy bits. :D
l7986 chapter 5 . 3/18/2013
Man went to go click the next button and got all sad when I realized there isnt going to be another next. Well now I can at least speculate on how emotional stunted a Shepard/Joker hellspawn would be.
Author-Of-Sin chapter 5 . 3/18/2013
Beautiful! Bravo! Fantastic crescendo for this story! *applauds* :D
Mordinette chapter 4 . 3/16/2013
I really liked Joker teasing her with his strip show, and this was so sexy:

"Come over here," he said and took her hand, pulling her out of her seat and into his lap. She put all her weight on him for a split second before she remembered his bones and started to spring back up again, but he wrapped his arms around her to keep her there. "Hey, member of the 'I'm A Cyborg' club now, remember? I can hold you." And there weren't enough words to describe just how that made him feel. Always before he'd have to be over-cautious in intimate moments so he didn't break a bone and kill the mood, but now he could support her weight and hold her hand without worrying. It gave him a surge of masculine pride, and he couldn't resist pulling her down for a kiss. She wrapped her arms around his neck and melted into him, pushing his fedora to the floor, returning the kiss with passion that sent shockwaves of want through his whole body. Her lips left his, only to leave a hot trail down to the dip in his collarbone, and his fingers tightened on her waist as she ran her tongue out to taste his skin.

"I know you said that you liked a man in a suit, but this . . ."

"Maybe it's not so much the suit as it is the pilot wearing it." She returned to his lips and explored his mouth, massaging his tongue with hers. He stroked her knee and pulled up the hem of her dress inch by inch as he worked his way up her thigh, but she stopped him with a strangled chuckle.

"Don't start anything you're not gonna finish right now."

"Who says I'm not gonna finish?" His hand slid higher and he could feel the damp fabric of her panties with the edge of his finger. Shepard gasped and gripped his forearm, although whether to stop him or to urge him on he wasn't sure. When she didn't try to push him away again, he cupped her sex and stroked her through her underwear, drawing forth a soft moan that made the blood pool with heat between his legs.

Curse whatever has interrupted them though!
Suilven chapter 4 . 3/15/2013
Aw, one final voyage. I feel as teary as Shepard. I loved that EDI was still there, as she's so much a part of the Normandy, too.

"He was trying not to sweat or be overly obvious in front of the others, so he undid his tie and let it hang loose from his neck, then opened the top two buttons of his shirt. A sharp intake of breath from his right got his attention and he saw Shepard staring intently at her cards as she fidgeted in her seat. She looked up at him again, her lips parted as her eyes traced the line of his jaw down to the exposed skin of his neck, her gaze so heavy he could almost feel it. Remembering their earlier conversation in the car, Joker smirked, tugged his collar down, and let his fingers trail down his chest. Her legs crossed and she leaned back, fanning herself with her cards."

Uh... yum. ;)

I love how he then torments her here:

"He began his own version of strip poker then. When he lost the next hand, he shrugged out of his jacket and dropped it onto the floor. He folded on the hand after that and had her help him with his cufflinks so he could roll his sleeves up to his elbow. She was having a hard time not staring now, and had force her attention to the cards. The glances she shot him for the rest of the game had gone from innocence to downright obscene, saying something more like, "I know what your tongue tastes like, and I can't wait to find out about the rest of you.""

This:

""Don't start anything you're not gonna finish right now."

"Who says I'm not gonna finish?" His hand slid higher and he could feel the damp fabric of her panties with the edge of his finger. Shepard gasped and gripped his forearm, although whether to stop him or to urge him on he wasn't sure. When she didn't try to push him away again, he cupped her sex and stroked her through her underwear, drawing forth a soft moan that made the blood pool with heat between his legs.

"God, you're so wet. I want to—"

His omnitool, apparently programmed with the new and improved "cockblocking asshole" VI personality, beeped on his wrist and he let out a frustrated groan."

My reaction was basically: Yes, yes, yes... NO! I hate you, cockblocking asshole VI personality!

Although, to this:

""No, it's probably just a satellite or something. I should go back up to the cockpit to make sure, though." It was with the greatest reluctance that they parted and stood up, but he pulled her against him again to say, "Meet me up there in five?" She could feel him, hard and needy, against her thigh and the muscles low in her stomach clenched. If he hadn't been holding her up, her buckling knees would have spilled her to the floor."

My reaction was: Oh my sweet cow, I can only dream that they're going to have sexy times *in* *his* *chair*. This, I need this, in a most unhealthy way.

I also loved Shepard being all wobbly and unsteady after he left:

"She kissed his cheek and watched him go, then slumped down in the chair to catch her breath. Once she was reasonably sure she could walk in a straight line without falling down, she headed to the bathroom to make sure everything was in order before heading up to the bridge."

I love this story. *gives the story a humongous glomp*
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