|Reviews for Suffer Not a Witch|
| ProtagonistAlert chapter 17 . 11/19
(I know this is something of an old story, but I tend to try and review all the stories I read, so this is getting a critique anyway!)
I'm not sure how to handle this review. Not so much because I don't know what to say- there is a bit of that, but it's minor- but more because I feel like there's a couple approaches I could take.
I think I'll approach this in the sense of it being... a morality play, in a way. A story with a plot, but one that is more about the politics of magic and the nature of its usage, particularly among those whom are heavily pious. There is an overarching mystery, of course, and it plays a role in the story. However in the end this mystery merely feeds into the overarching themes of the work, and tends to be secondary, in many respects. A good chunk of the fanfic isn't even about the mystery, but the trial of a man likely mostly innocent of the various crimes that he is accused of committing, these accusations being driven by pious fanaticism.
When looking at the story through this lens, it holds up pretty well. The pacing is slightly slow, particularly in the trial segment, but not to an obscene or overly-distracting degree. The moral doesn't have the most amount of nuance possible, but it definitely has enough, with viewpoints ranging from liberal (though politically-motivated) in the archbishop to moderate (the pastor) to extremely conservative (Cavit and the Witchhunter). The argument for-or-against magic in general doesn't feel too heavily one-sided. I could make the argument that the Witchhunter is something of a caricature, but he sadly really isn't. The conflict is told in an inviting and relatively compelling manner- the whole trial arc could have easily been cut out of the story, but it feeds into the themes so seemlessly and so competently written that it definitely benefits the story to have been included.
I do feel that you did a great job at building on the world of GrimGrimoire as well. The game only gave us a very, very brief picture of what form anti-witch sentiment takes, and you manage to run with that and exploit it for all that it's worth, in the most effective manner possible. You manage to take the game's groundwork and expand on it incredibly effectively, and create an intriguing setting. The political machinations in the background are genuinely interesting and never feel particularly trite or dry.
Your characterization of Lillet is a particular high point as well. You really take the base that the game provides and run with it, creating a realistic depiction of what she would be like when she had grown into her own. You effectively balance her strengths as a mage with her flaws, and make her a very entertaining and likable protagonist. So props for that.
Finally, the plot itself is perfectly interesting. There's a compelling mystery that serves as the story's backbone and the solution definitely doesn't feel like it was pulled out of thin air. The main plot never really felt neglected, even when focus starts being put on the trial subplot. The twists and turns managed to continually keep me intrigued, and all the reveals made total sense, so that's a plus too.
From a technical aspect, everything is essentially golden. The story is structured extremely well- even if I felt that the trial lagged slightly- and in terms of spelling or grammar, aside from a few glitches here and there, the story feels incredibly professional and polished. So fantastic work on that score as well.
Overall, a very compelling and interesting story that I definitely feel deserves being on my favorites list.
| Duncan0Idaho chapter 17 . 7/14
The pedantic attorney in me points out that Lillet's wrong; you can do murder without the intent to kill, in the case of so-called "felony murder" (any death that occurs in the commission of a felony is murder attributable to the felon) and in cases where the act of the killer is of such a grossly reckless disregard of human life that it's treated as murder instead of manslaughter. She's a magician, not a criminal lawyer, after all.
Interesting, the closest figure we have in our country is that off the preter intentional murder, when the intention of the active subject is less than what the result ended being.
| Guest chapter 17 . 6/21/2013
There was a time when I was afraid of reading your new stuff and it started when you made your foray into writing Nanoha fanfiction. Then I sat down and read some of it and thought, "Hey! This is okay." The same old consistent quality was still there. It's silly, now that I think about it, that the fear even set in in the first place. Your writing style is still recognisably DezoPenguin.
Which brings me around to Grim Grimoire. The way you handled Lillet and Amoretta's relationship was what convinced me to start on your Nanoha stuff.
I would have posted the above elsewhere, but ... old and new stuff, right? I think what I originally wanted to say involved me commenting on how you portrayed the church and how it reminded me of ... something or another, but now that I've lost my trail of thought let me just post about how happy I am that you're still writing. Even if it's a confusing mess. (Sorry pardon.)
| Moczo chapter 17 . 6/18/2013
You know what this means, right? You have no choice. Sometime within the next, let's be generous and say five months, I expect to see Lillet Blan: Ace Attorney.
You have nobody to blame but yourself. I hope you understand that. From the moment Lil saved the day with her elite legal skills, your fate was sealed. May God have mercy on your soul. (And no worries, I am sure He didn't like Gervase either.)
| armoredishamael chapter 17 . 6/15/2013
Excellent story- the mystery was well done, and it was very believably setup to be challenging to Lillet, even at this point in her career.
the contrast between Gervase and the Father was also nice, if standard, since it would have been pretty easy to default to 'religion is BAD' with Gervase chewing the scenery so thoroughly ;)
eagerly looking forward to your next story!
| parody 'r' us chapter 17 . 6/10/2013
Lillet wins, Ger-what-his-name is dead, the Manticore that was killing people is dead and the door-to-door salesman is free. A good ending, despite the death count. Though if one were to compare it to the school... It's small in comparison.
| ByLanternLight chapter 17 . 6/9/2013
A fantastic mystery. 5/5.
| Spikesagitta chapter 17 . 6/9/2013
Insufferable woman. Nice to see Lillet take her down a peg or two.
| Belthasar chapter 17 . 6/9/2013
This was a really good story.
| parody 'r' us chapter 16 . 5/27/2013
The witch hunter's dead? He's really dead? YES! Now to get rid of his replacement, who is SOMEHOW worse. Too bad, Lillet apparently likes his cooking.
| Moczo chapter 16 . 5/27/2013
Oh no! Gervase was killed! What a tragedy, what a loss! I mean, we have Ommegang around to be a frothing unreasoning prick, but it just isn't the same. He doesn't have the same FIRE, the same passion! This is a true loss for us all. *sob*
And hey, monster! Darn manticores, they're worse than cockroaches. And I have to say, I do love the astounding detail you put into these things. You go into greater detail on the magic than the game did, and every bit of it makes perfect sense. As always, amazing chapter. _
| For Spite chapter 16 . 5/27/2013
Ah, I knew it was a manticore from the wound descriptions but I wasn't sure why it was disappearing and reappearing before now. Playing around with relics you don't understand never ends well, I suppose, whether outwardly magical or 'holy'.
| Spikesagitta chapter 16 . 5/26/2013
Yes! Well he got what he deserved. And I was right! Sort of. He did cause what happend here. He just didn't know it. I enjoyed his death a little too much I think. :p
| parody 'r' us chapter 15 . 5/23/2013
Please tell me the witch-hunter is gonna get smack. Please tell me he's gonna get smacked. Please tell me he's gonna get smacked. For the love of all that is holy and unholy, PLEASE tell me he's gonna get smacked.
| Moczo chapter 15 . 5/22/2013
Oh-ho, Lillet has a PLAN. As she is known for outwitting archdevils and liches (Calvaros counts, look at him!), and her current opponent is Sterling 'THAT FLUFFY CLOUD LOOKS HERETICAL!' Gervase, I wager it shall not be the greatest mental conflict of her career, nor even of her last month. Probably equal to that time she and Amoretta played Pictionary.
And seriously, show us the monster already.