|Reviews for Roses of my Good Intentions|
| Araceli L chapter 5 . 1/6
Funny, you didn't like this chapter as much, I thought it was the best one.
I love your characterization of the Happy Mask Salesman. This is such a cool idea for a story! I love it! Now, my concrit: I think the HMS is best characterized in this chapter. Slightly insane from what living through an endless loop of time has done to him. I love the connection he has to his masks (the only thing that kept him sane during this weird loop?) and the love he feels for them. Now, when it comes to insane characters,you have to strike a very carefully balanced act between acting wild and messed up while keeping it in character. It's sort of confusing and really difficult, but I think you did really well, especially in this chapter. I'd love if we were given a reason to root for the HMS, something to cause sympathy so we would have our hero of the story; he would emerge as the protagonist. (Unless, of course, he is the antagonist and there's nothing good about him...but even then, that makes him a flat character.) of course, were not too far in yet, so I can't say you haven't so my suggestion is just to continue to add depth to his character. You have a very unique and original perspective, and I'm loving it. Again, this is such a good idea. I can't wait to see more from this story! Keep up the good work!
| PinaColadaFox chapter 5 . 1/5
Oh my gosh I'm so glad you updated this!
Okay. So I was already laughing by 3rd line where the HMS contemplates how he got into the milk bar. His obsession with his masks and his insane laughter never gets old. He's hilarious.
Awww, Anju thought the rose was from Kafei! I guess she's in for a rude awakening when she realizes who really sent it. My goodness, I could picture the last scene perfectly with drunken Mask Salesman perfectly. Poor, poor Anju.
I didn't think this chapter was bad at all. My only criticism has to do with the formatting, not the content itself. I know you said you didn't proofread, but if you do decide to come back and edit this, just be sure to break up some of those large blocks of text because they're rather difficult to digest. I didn't catch any grammar errors, or if I did I don't remember what they were. Good job, and I'm looking forward to more. :)
| Soldier Cat chapter 4 . 9/22/2013
Please, continue! c:
| xXThat-Other-HobbitxX chapter 4 . 7/22/2013
THIS IS SO INTERESTING! The way you write the Salesman is spot-on, and the description is perfect. KEEP IT UP!
| linklover88 chapter 4 . 7/21/2013
Wow! This is great! I love your style of writing, it's beautiful :) The Happy Mask Salesman is such an interesting character!
| PinaColadaFox chapter 4 . 7/21/2013
Filler, maybe, but entertaining filler so I certainly wouldn't call it junk! laughed more than a few times at the HMS's social ineptness, especially when he slammed the door in whichever Rosa sister's face and at the end when he left that dead rose on Anju's desk. Poor guy...XD
I'm really curious about these upcoming "dark themes" that were mentioned in the summary. Until next time! :)
| PinaColadaFox chapter 3 . 7/18/2013
I've been meaning to check out some of your new stories for a while now (especially the HMS ones...) and I'm particularly curious about where this one is going! Anyway, on with the review.
[Keeps me from seeing only what I want, and need, to see.] This bit was really enlightening. I've also wondered the same thing about the HMS, if he ignores sad/upsetting things to keep himself from going insane.
Oh goodess, Guru-guru smells BAD. Ew. As soon as the HMS mentioned that lovely Bremen's mask, I just knew he'd come up with some scheme to get his hands on it! Ahaha. Great ending. I love how off-kilter the HMS is, and I like how you give us some insight into his psyche, but you still keep up that mysterious edge, despite the story being in first person. Looking forward to more!
| Colleentj chapter 3 . 7/15/2013
I like this so far! The idea's very original, and you're a good writer. You've developed an interesting voice for the salesman, and it makes the narration flow smoothly. Good work!
| Fayre Eternity chapter 2 . 5/12/2013
I really love how you portray the HMS! He's almost.., OCD? He has anxiety, for sure. I like getting a glimpse behind that constant smile. Bravissimo!
Please, update :)
| Cookehz chapter 2 . 3/26/2013
This story's getting really interesting! please continue!
| PinaColadaFox chapter 2 . 1/18/2013
[A smile is plastered over her face, making me absolutely positive that her real one must be stunning.] I love this. :)
[I sit, allowing myself to relax as far backwards as possible while still wearing my bag of masks. They will not leave my back until I die. And even then, I'll still have them on my back.] Bahahaha! This is gold. This actually made me laugh out loud.
Like I've mentioned earlier, I think you have a real knack for showing characterization through actions. In this chapter, you really showed off how perceptive the HMS actually is behind that poker face of his. Nice work!
| Library2.0 chapter 2 . 1/18/2013
Great chapter. You need to update.
| PinaColadaFox chapter 1 . 1/17/2013
Well, my curiosity has been piqued. I have a feeling this is going to end up like "The Phantom of the Clock Tower" or something, ahaha. :)
[My eyes shift the other way, and as I'm pushing the door open, I spot a boy wearing a mask. A smile instantly pops onto my face, and I feel a sudden longing to obtain said mask.] I love this sentence. It really shows off his obsessive tendencies.
Good job. I'm interested to see where this goes.
| Library2.0 chapter 1 . 1/17/2013
Great plot. Update soon.