Reviews for Natsuki's Piyo
random-prussian-laughter chapter 1 . 1/3/2015
you should write another chapter
sonamyfreakO chapter 1 . 7/11/2013
XD That ending! Gah! my sides! Can't stop laughing!
Blue Rogue Linds chapter 1 . 1/17/2013
You switched from past tense to present tense in the very first sentence. It should be: Class was over and Syo entered his dorm room. Or vice-versa. Make up your mind which tense you want to use or you'll end up confusing the audience...

You're also missing a lot of punctuation. Most sentences end in periods.

And Syo dropping the F-bomb out of nowhere? Highly uncalled for and this should be rated M because of the language. Either take out the word altogether or rate this properly. That or someone may report this for breaking the rules. Then it will be removed without warning by some very angry admins. :/