|Reviews for A Bullet Too Far|
| The Constitutionalist chapter 7 . 4/13/2013
This is a great chapter, it did have a few grammar issues, but nonetheless, this was very well written. I like how you were able to describe the situations and actions with great detail and I'm highly impressed.
I have to say that I was getting worried that this story was dropped, but it turned out to be a case of unintended MIA.
About the beginning A/N, I just want to point out that you spelt my penname wrong, it's supposed to be - The Constitutionalist -, I guess it was just an unintended mistake that could be fixed by the next update, and don't worry too much about it, stuff happens.
As for the use of the Jackal ally, I have to say that I'm ecstatic that you've considered using the idea. I'm just wondering what gender it is due to the name Kaz'asha, because it sounds somewhat feminine in my opinion, which I think could present a greater number of possible actions to come between Davis and Kaz'asha, which I think would enhance the story.
Anyways, it's good to see another update after such a long time, I'm hoping to see more when you're able to update, and Semper Fi - The Constitutionalist -
| The Constitutionalist chapter 6 . 1/31/2013
This is an interesting chapter due to how you made Davis immobile and used really good descriptions of his surroundings and thoughts. This was short, but it sets up for possibly a good action sequence in the coming chapter(s).
I had an idea for something later on in the story. Maybe at some point, Davis could be finding a new weapon, but there aren't any usable human weapons and has to improvise by obtaining a Covenant weapon. While he's doing that, he could encounter a group of brutes, skirmishers, jackals, and grunts doing something like dealing with an insubordinate jackal who has been pitted to a fight to the death. Davis could acquire a Spiker from a brute by stealthily grabbing it by sneaking up on it, but upon seeing the jackal being brutally beaten by another brute, he could snatch the weapon and kill them all except for the jackal to interrogate and find a way to escape. After getting no answers/answers, Davis could either jackal out of it's misery, or offer it a chance at revenge against the Covenant.
This is just an idea and if you like it, you can use it.
Anyways, Semper Fi - The Constitutionalist -
| ShadowPasinThru chapter 5 . 1/27/2013
Not bad. The detailing and fluidity of the story's progress is great.
| The Constitutionalist chapter 5 . 1/19/2013
This was intense! This chapter is amazing and the plot is thickening. You really put an aspect of war that causes the story to be incredibly drastic and would lead to some sort of angst for Davis. The child that was hit by the 3 needler spikes gripped me and I would like to point out that it is hard for such things to believe that has happened to someone so young. This is a dramatic chapter with that part and, although sad, brings forth some of the realities of war many people don't want to admit happens in reality.
I also tell some people I have following my story 'A Newcomer' to take a look at this story the next time I PM with them. I'm doing this since I don't think anyone, other than me, has read this story and would like to promote the story to help out. I'm relatively new to the site as well and am willing to help others.
I'll mark you as a favorite author and will follow your profile to see where this story and any others you wish to share.
Anyways, Semper Fi - The Constitutionalist -
| The Constitutionalist chapter 4 . 1/19/2013
This is starting to look like a pretty good story. Incredible detail in the set up of the combat, albeit just the attack on Davis. There is emotion in this and I hope you keep it up! I will now mark this as a favorite and will keep following this story. You have a good basis for this story and hope to see more soon, but don't rush it, that's when errors can occur.
Semper Fi - The Constitutionalist -
| The Constitutionalist chapter 3 . 1/18/2013
This story has a lot of good things in it, I like how well you describe a character's appearance and what their actions are. This story has potential and I would like to see how this will flow. I will mark this to follow and see where this will lead.
Semper Fi (translated from Latin to English, Always Faithful) - The Constitutionalist -
| BigBadg3r chapter 1 . 1/18/2013
Reviews will be gratefully accepted; positive and otherwise. I really like seeing what other people think of my work, so that I can adapt my writing and improve upon it. Stay tuned for the first chapter, which will be up shortly!