|Reviews for Perseverance|
| Exceeds Expectations chapter 1 . 2/27/2013
This was really cute :3 Percy in the Muggle world is not something I've seen before, and I think it's a great idea. Muggle!Audrey is great, too. And I really like how you had him obsess over the kiss and what it meant and his relationship with Audrey because it's quite realistic - and also adorable.
I lovelovelove how confused he is by the Muggle world and that his coworkers just decide he must be foreign. The pop music thing was very funny and I can just imagine his confusion!
And the PercyAudrey sweetness here is lovely. Awkward!Percy always makes me smile. :)
| silver-nightstorm chapter 1 . 2/26/2013
I loved Percy's thoughts on pop music, it really made me laugh. Honestly, your writing style is perfect for writing Percy... you're very matter-of-fact and it works perfectly :D Write more Percy! :D
| TrueBeliever831 chapter 1 . 2/24/2013
This was cute. I've never read Percy/Audry before and this was definitely enjoyable.. I like what you did with this... and I like how you made Percy brood over the kiss... he is definitely the brooding type... amazing job.
| articcat621 chapter 1 . 2/23/2013
That was so cute! I love Percy and Audrey! You did their relationship perfectly, and I just loved it! Your language was great, and Percy was so in character!
| ProfessorSquirrell chapter 1 . 2/23/2013
Awww this is so freaking adorable! I ship your PercyAudrey and I am a hardcore PercyOliver shipper so that's kind of a big deal. I love how awkward Percy feels and how Audrey is so down to earth and really sweet. I absolutely adored this.
| Lil'MissChris chapter 1 . 2/20/2013
Now there's always something intriguing when reading a Percy/Audrey fic. I don't actually know if she's a muggleborn if she's just a muggle. And it's always interesting to think about how they met if she wasn't magical.
I thought this was very endearing. I love the idea of Percy tossing and turning, and laying awake at night. The story unfolded beautifully and I have to admit, I like Audrey's straight forward nature.
"Hey, do I look like the kind of girl who'd tell a boy she liked him and then take it back the next day?"
"I suppose not."
"Well there you go."
They were silent again for a little while.
"So…" Percy began again.
Audrey stopped. "Percy, if you have something to say to me, just spill it out. Are you having second thought?"
That whole part was just great, and probably my favourite part of the whole story.
| AnneNevilleReviews chapter 1 . 2/20/2013
Your first paragraph is magic. I can visualize Percy tossing and turning and fluffing his pillow, trying to get everything perfect. I can also imagine his shock that someone so popular would kiss him, an odd-ball. With those thoughts, plus the grin, you've captured your character quickly and clearly. I find it interesting that Percy still—even as an (I assume) adult—thinks of women as “girls.” I'm not sure how long after his graduation this story is happening, but he could easily be in his twenties. That's pretty revealing about him! No wonder he hasn't had a girlfriend since Penelope. ;-)
There are a number of things (beyond that great opening) that I really enjoyed about this story. Here are a few:
[Somewhere along the line, they had decided that he must be a foreigner.] This line really made me laugh! I can imagine poor Percy fumbling through his day in a Muggle setting. It's quite a picture.
The way Percy is confused about whether he and Audrey are boyfriend and girlfriend just because they kissed—and his knowledge that perhaps it works differently in the Muggle world. It's a good thing that he decides to ask.
I like the cute-but-awkward way Percy opens his conversation with Audrey. The rhythm of the dialogue mimics his (and her?) jitters well.
[They were silent again for a little while.
"So…" Percy began again.] LOL. The way Percy summons the courage to kiss Audrey is also sweet—I like how she tastes different now than she did the night before, and that Percy notices. It makes it clear how much he's been obsessing over that first kiss . . .
Here's one rough patch (IMHO) that I noticed:
[After hours and hours of tossing and turning, Percy finally fell asleep, bare minutes before his alarm clock sounded – or so it appeared to him.
"Say, you're looking rather pale tonight, Percy!" Brian commented. "Got a bit of a hangover?"] It seems that we have transitioned from Percy's bedroom to the restaurant sometime before Brian starts talking (I'm assuming he's a co-worker) – but until you mention Mr Walker, I really thought we were still in Percy's apartment, so having boss suddenly appear seemed a bit – well, odd. Like he's stalking Percy in his bedroom. (Now there's a new ship . . .)
This is a really sweet story. I didn't read the prequel, but from what I gather Percy is working out his issues by living in the Muggle world. I enjoyed the way you put him in an awkward situation, capture his character, and give him a way to redeem himself . . . all at Chez Maurice.
| The Original Horcrux chapter 1 . 2/20/2013
OHMYGOD YOU WROTE A SEQUEL TO HOW TO BE A MUGGLE!? WHY WAS I NOT AWARE OF THIS!? I loved How to be A Muggle so much and it's awesome to see the aftermath of it and how it wasn't just a one night thing and then when they get to work its all awkward and they don't talk to each other. They just came out and said it and admitted how they felt and I really liked that :) Just one thing, it might be easier to read if there were line breaks, but it didn't really detract from the story at all.
Keep up the amazing work and DFTBA!
| starlight.moon.princess chapter 1 . 2/19/2013
Adorable :) Percy's all nervous and d'awwhhh...I wonder what Audrey actually thinks about the fact that he's never seen a movie before in his life XP
Just a tiny bit of concrit:
[Mr Walker, the patron of the restaurant – scoffed.] Either the dash should be replaced with a comma, or the comma by a dash. I'm guessing this must have been an overlooked editing mistake.
But overall, this is very cute :)
| Fire The Canon chapter 1 . 2/13/2013
Yay! More Muggle!Audrey :) I like, I like.
I really felt for Percy here. His confusion in the Muggle world kind of made me laugh, though. I do enjoy it when wizards can't use Muggle objects.
There were a few typos here and there, but over all, a good job!
| Forever Siriusly Sirius chapter 1 . 2/11/2013
Aww this was sweet. I like how snitchy their boss was, and I loved it when Percy kissed audrey :) I love how anxious Percy was as he didnt know the rules.
Did you mean cacao? I mean thats the actual bean or the plant that cocoa comes from, so wouldnt it make sense that her lips tasted (well in this case they didnt but) like cocoa and spices not cacao and spices. I'mm just asking because it seems a little strange to me.
Also in the end, 'going to a cinma' is 'cinema' spelt that way because percy doesnt know how to spell it or was that a typo?
Over all i really liked this, good job!
| our dancing days chapter 1 . 2/10/2013
The relationship between Percy and Audrey is always an interesting one, because people do it so differently and this was a great characterisation of both of them. It was easy to read, and extremely fluffy, which is quite nice for a Sunday afternoon! :)
| MindMySimpleSoul chapter 1 . 2/6/2013
Aww, I've always liked Percy, though I thought he and his family had reconciled. I suppose this is why I should have read the other fic you mentioned...Either way, it was interesting to read your depiction of how he met his future wife. Percy is, true to form, wonderfully awkward in this fic. I hope he can one day show his face in the wizarding world again.
| lowi chapter 1 . 2/5/2013
Aww, this was so sweet! :D I really like the idea of this; Audrey being a muggle, the two of them meeting through work, her showing Percy all Mugglw traditions...you make it definitely work!
And "cinma," that was so cute somehow, haha!
Very well done, I sure enjoyed this story!
| Montley chapter 1 . 2/4/2013
Even though Audrey was not at all explored in the books, I found it interesting that you made her a muggle, and it's interesting how Percy's a muggle waiter, and I'd want to know the background behind that, since I figured he'd be high up in the Ministry.
I liked those little snippets of him adjusting to muggle culture and his confusion with pop music, that was quite funny.
Very nice story overall!