Reviews for The Burnt God
fantasychica37 chapter 1 . 2/4/2014
Okay, I'm sorry, I still think it's messed up but i guess with this you can please divine mysterious secret plans. Happy?
Guest chapter 1 . 1/17/2014
I'm re-posting the review here as well, cause why not? I'm from my phone now so I can't get logged in. If you are ever interested in finding me - I live on this site under the name of Blackheart Dracon.

Good Lord, this is perfection!
I've read it in one breath and I loved every single bit of it.
Your Melkor is so natural, as if Tolkien has come to life to study the Vala deeper. All Melkor's progress of character is so believable, that I want to bow to you for this for an eternity:)
But Sauron stunned me even more. While yours-his appereance is very rare and therefore I found it fantastic to imagine, his character left me breathless.
Because he is Pure Darkness, Darkness that opposes Light only in ways of thoughts and design. He is no Evil, because he loves, he honourably serves, he grants loyalty, he never punishes just for his own joy. He stands up for what he thinks right and he stands up for others. The lattest has struck me most. He is truithful Darkness. Darkness that knows Order, Honor and Dignity. Gosh, I'm in love with him now even more than ever. And how he loves his Master and tells him the expensive truth is realy breathtaking.
Well, his maiden-adventure was hilarious. As well as his rivalry with Gothmog. Two damn idiots:):)
And the last scene - with Melkor telling Sauron the truth and taking off his crown and the whole love act after, especially the moment when their spirits meet... Gives me an urge to go re-read it a bit later.
Yeh, the Mouth of Sauron coming out this way is damn interesting:)
Thank you for the Story.
I'll be re-reading it. It is gorgeous.
crimeson-plasma chapter 1 . 12/20/2013
¡Empecé a leer este fanfic casi por recomendación de un amigo y me ha encantado! Me da una pena enorme el haberlo termiando, tengo que releerlo pronto (muy pronto, o al menos en cuanto me haya acabado de leer Silmarillion). No puedo expresar en palabras lo mucho que me gusto este fanfic, estare encantada de seguir leyendo lo que escribas en el futuro :D
Grymas chapter 4 . 8/6/2013
At first I felt dubious about this story, but one thing I had to admit: I did not have the slightest idea, where it would lead to. And that alone was great:) So I kept reading to found it really engrossing and clever-written. Dialogs, development of the characters (especially your Sauron, who is completely unique and different from all versions of him I know from the Internets;)) But, despite of the aforementioned, your fick was also (to me) pretty depressing . Because Melkor, Sauron, the Shadow - *everyone* suffers here, just for entirely different reasons. I must confess: sometimes I stop reading things, that make me too sad. But it was not the case; your view on the characters and their individual struggles was too interesting. And eventually I did not regret, for the ending turned out to be brilliant! We all know, how this story goes later, but that conversation and its... consequences (I guess I should not spoiler here) are precisely that little spark of optimism that is needed here. It leaves the reader with such warm feelings and such sense of relief, that after all that shit they have been through, they finally found a moment of peace and almost happiness, no matter how brief.
All in all, it is an original and wonderful story. I love it!:D
Arieisit chapter 2 . 8/4/2013
Ok, so I read this because Zlu and Luff said to. Lol. I'm glad I started reading though. It's great!
Zlu and Luff chapter 4 . 6/18/2013
To be honest, when you said this would be the last chapter, I was very upset and I could not see how you could possibly finish the fic awesomely with just one more chapter. I also expected some really unhappy ending. And instead you managed to pull this off amazingly, the chapter is utterly perfect and so is the ending!

I will send the full review to you in a pm.

Zlu here.
Supreme-won chapter 4 . 6/12/2013
I love how each chapter comes from the perception Melkor and Sauron. I can just imagine the reactions Melkor would have to the Valar going around hugging him, Mandos daring to dishonor him...Manwe claiming a happy world has no monsters or darkness (say WHAT?) and Sauron's expression when Melkor does something irrationally and then blames him for it. The portrayal of Sauron's humiliation as a woman was hilarious.
Oh, and their sex was violent, as is fitting :) that threesome with Gothmog...that does sound tempting to read about now...
Jennifer chapter 3 . 3/27/2013
Hey there. :3 I was suggested to read this by a friend of mine named Luff, she speaks highly of your work, and I must say she is right! . This story is so amazing and original, and I love the fact that you added the rivalry between Gothmog and Sauron, because I always pictured it being that way xD The last part of this chapter gave me so many feelings, though, now I have to try not to cry agh, it's so beautiful and painful ;n; (It's also been brought to my attention that you have the same birthday as me, so hey a birthday brother or sister! :D)
Lux chapter 1 . 3/26/2013
...Olvidé comentar uno de mis momentos favoritos! cuando Melkor "mejoró" al orco, realmente me pareció genial y hermoso como representaste el contraste entre la naturaleza caótica, llena de energía y descontrol de Melkor, que desde esa perspectiva deja de ser algo inútil y sin sentido, versus el control lógico y ordenado de Sauron que admira una cualidad que le es totalmente ajena, supongo que en lo complementario de ambos estaría la clave de su relación.
Lux chapter 1 . 3/26/2013
Leí que eres de España, así que mejor escribir en español p

Me gustó mucho tu historia, especialmente el último capítulo, pobre Sauron supongo que por eso se perdió toda la invasión de Angband y la captura de Melkor? xDD

Lo único que tal vez cuestionaría es que a Melkor en el último capítulo le falta crueldad, después de todo es el malo más malo de Arda xD pero si creo que está muy bien que lo personifiques no sólo como un tipo sádico, sin mayor trasfondo, sino más infantil y caprichoso. De hecho me pareció perfecta la manera en que se mostraba cuando estaba en la prisión de Mandos. Sauron me parece casi inmejorable xD obsesivamente controlador, ordenado y cruel.

Espero que sigas escribiendo y estaré atenta al próximo capítulo )
Guest chapter 3 . 3/24/2013
This fic.
OH SWEET ERU ILLUVATAR ON A BICYCLE.
This fic. THIS FIC.
I seriously tried not to review this glittering piece of awesome while I was still overwhelmed by tons of feels, but I just couldn't resist.
BECAUSE FEELS.
You write the most interesting, crazy, well-thought Melkor I have ever seen (well, read), the story is deliciously unpredictable and Sauron. Oh Sauron. Come here you sweet little sadistic baby and let me hug you, you little furry ball of malice and doom.
I'm sorry this review doesn't make any sense. I will try to write another one that contains something more than just my crazy ramblings and nonsensical screaming of joy.
Until that day, I worship your awesome, and wait for an update to this masterpiece.
Zlu chapter 3 . 3/18/2013
Hey, Ash's link did not work out, so I decided to repeat it here, replace DOT and SLASH with you know what.
favDOTmeSLASHd5ye4lp
It may look weird, but that's it. Seriously ffnet and its need to destroy links.
Ash chapter 3 . 3/17/2013
Hello! I am so bad at leaving reviews, but I wanted to say that I LOVED your first two chapters, and that I am DYING OF HAPPINESS over chapter 3. I would itemize all the things I loved about it for you, and it would take five paragraphs, but since I have not the time today, I shall save it for some other day, and instead give you this token of my gratitude for writing such an amazing fanfiction, that has absolutely everything good in it. art/The-Elf-Slayer-360096973 Fanart of your Sauron, who is marvelous in every way!
flying carpets chapter 3 . 3/10/2013
ha so it cut my review in half XDD lets paste the second half (maybe there will be third if it cuts it again XDDD)

Ok, so now I sobbed and begged for more and I can continue XDDD:

"How could he trust someone that wore on his face the two heaven lights that caused him so much pain: the pale orb of the Moon, and the fiery globe of the Sun?" Epic paralell between Sauron's eyes and the celestial bodies! By the way once again let me say that I love the "Eye of Sauron" and not the "eyes of sauron" concept. Really fitting, well

justified, interesting, it spices things up, gives him an even more vivid image!

"The look of his Lord pierced him painfully, and all the Balrogs around, that could still see him," Oh my god so this is why he will later yield to Luthien when she threatens to strip him of his form and have him endure melkor's eyes on his naked spirit... alsjdklasdjkljlkj

"When all the stones were placed, Melkor sealed the wall with a curse,and Sauron was left in total darkness." FEEELINGS ;u;

and the perfect way it's phrased "sealed the wall with a curse"! O_O aksdhjas

"And in the midst of darkness, pressed inside the narrow space, he recalled again the song of Melkor,the one he had sung in the beginning of he murmured it to himself, trembling with grief and love." Noooo Sauron! You're such a bastard

Sauron and at the same time such a poor thing striving to get at least a shred of your master's attention and affection and interest or anything. This contrast is so perfect ;u; (another word i keep overusing but IT. IS. PERFECT!) Sauron murmuring Melkor's song, trembling with grief and love... this just makes me shiver and feel so sad for him even if he's a jerk, oh i love all this so much, I need more, I want this story to never stop ;u; And I want to see what becomes of Sauron and Melkor and Mandos and everything! ;u;

So yes, MORE! :3

And now a question because I am really interested; what has even inspired you to write this? What sparked the Melkor and Mandos idea and the portrayal of Sauron's attitude towards Melkor? Share some of your secrets with us *u*!

And oh, now that I typed some of my vast feelings out, I'll go more on technical side; there were some mistakes, especially in the first half (because then there is suddenly no mistakes, you probably got more focused and entranced by translating) so

I will send you corrections somewhere around thursday-friday maybe. Some mistakes are real fun, you'll be amused XDDDDDDD I

can already tell you one hilarious one, there are sounds of "flagellation". Flagellation is whipping... but whipping YOURSELF and not others! XDDD (in self-punishment) So I had this image of Sauron going between the orcs and whipping HIMSELF DRAMATICALLY AMONG THEM to punish them XDDD
and them being terrified XDDDDD IMAGINE that dramatic scene! If they loved him they would be suffering to see him hurting himself, that would be punishment enough for them! XDDDDD And other fun mistakes like that, also quite some probably spanish order of words in a sentence XDDDD But once again,s trangely only in first half. You're generally on that level of english where you write better, more beautiful and correct than even native speakers and then sometimes you all of a sudden make a very silly basic mistake so I am amused XDDDD But then sometimes the same sentence is written correctly few paragraphs lower, I think its just about how focused / attentive you are on a given day XDDD Anyway, I think you could use a sort of beta like me, so I'll send you all the corrections and suggestions during the week (very busy week so for now ill be silent for a while). And when you correct them, girl, we're going to poke your fic into people's faces until they read it. And when they read it, they'll love it like we do aksjldkjasdkj there's just no other way, it's addictive! *u*

ps. omg i wasnt supposed to be writing this review today and it wasnt supposed to be this long XDDDDD Lets see if theres a word limit on ffnet XDDD
FlyingCarpets1 chapter 3 . 3/10/2013
I... I don't know what to feel anymore. At this point I feel like building you a shrine and worshipping you there forever ;u;

I've read hundreds of fics in my life, in various fandoms but this one, this is THE FIC, the best one in my whole existence,

I can't contain my feelings ;_; What you did here, taking the canon and breathing so much life and personality, so much

conflict and feeling and humour and bitterness into its events and its characters, it is just unbelievable. I adore this

story, you are the best writer in the world, your mind is flawless.

But let me now tell you at least some of the million things that I loved!

Sauron. Oh gods, this Sauron. In just one chapter (even if a long one) you've managed to introduce him so vividly, he's so

interesting, so rich a character, cruel and arrogant but somewhat torn on the inside. Both the description of the mortal

shape he took on and the view we get into his spirit just leaves me speechless and in love with his character, because you

made him an entirely new character. 100% true to the canon. And at the same time so different, so amazing, it is sheer

pleasure to see him (because I do see him, I see everything, you're a genious and you know how to paint with words). His

eyes, oh how I love them. Such a strong character with such defining, strange features and nature. When he was saying

something, I was all alert and cherishing every moment, because it truly is epic,

"Be careful with what thou sayst, Gothmog. If thou callst me "one-eyed" again, I swear that from now on thou wilt be called "blind""

In this very moment I became entirely captivated by your depiction of Sauron. And then when this moment followed:

"Few were those who lived to tell the tale, after having encountered the black whip of Gorthaur the Cruel."

I was completely done in and full of epic feels and thanking the universe that I met you and that you are blessing us with this divine story!

Your Sauron is epic win. And his whip, god, his whip. His eyes and whip. Pure cruel perfection.

But alright I have a lot of my favourite quotes I still need to mention, bet Sauron will be appearing many times again but for now I also need to express my love for your perfect Melkor!

"Property hadn't existed for him, nor private life. His entire existence was a constant act of fusion with the earth and disintegration of the earth, an act so public and natural as a storm or a gale-force wind."

YES YES YES YES. You got the essence of Melkor down so perfectly aksjdlkasjd

I love how Sauron ponders on the change that took place in Melkor. Every thought is 100% spot-on! Each thoght is a new, unique and wonderful idea or notion, I really really want your mind and imagination please O_O

More of my fave quotes:

"It began in the palm of his hand, and ascended across the arm to his neck, and then went down like an incandescent torrent to the nipples, and the stomach, and between his legs, and then went inside and climbed his spine to the mouth."

The hottest, most perfect sentence in my life. And gosh, this whole Melkor / Mandos thing is just perfect. On one hand for a moment it's funny that Melkor goes around getting spontaneous boners while accidentally straying with his thoughts but then the way it is written, is so beautiful and so well phrased, the images are in my head all the time, I just can't... asdhjahk

"If my lord Melkor is displeased by mirrors, I can make sure that they all get what is coming to them." Sauron, you have the best quotes! I love everything that comes out of his mouth seriously but this is one of the funniest things XDDDDD

"-I don't think so, my Lord. They're just rumours from ignorant villagers. They have also called the nearby mountains "The Echoing Mountains", and the land behind, "The Land of Echoes". They aren't very bit his lip, furious. Now even geography was against him and conspired to make him look like a coward. " Poor poor Vala, now in Valinor they couldn't stop talking about him and Mandos and now in Beleriand they cant stop talking about him and Ungoliant and his girly screams, epic, the names of alll those places, ahhh perfection! XDDDDD

"And all the glorious plans of Sauron fell apart quickly, like a house built in dreams upon awakening."

this is so sad in a way. Melkor probably used to once be the force driving and inspiring Sauron's plans and now he's hindering them, he's against them, he suspects them, he dislikes them. It is sad to behold.

"He realized that these were finally the orthy rivals that he had missed for so long in Middle Earth." "And Sauron found out, to his surprise, that even though the Elves were defeating them, a kind of strange joy trembled inside him." Woohoo, Sauron finds worthy enemies in the Noldor, I love this concept! And I know I may be overusing the word "love" but I mean it so much and there's just no better word to express it ;u;

Sauron being the one behind the catching Maedhros, behind the trap, all the reasons he had for it - you've made it work so well! And wow it makes such a perfect sense to me now, I mean, Melkor would never even think of giving someone a silmaril in negotiations, they are his, he'd not even insidiously joke about it. It being Sauron's idea all along just fits so well.

"If there is one thing that is predictable in the capricious gods, this is that, indeed, they can be bought with gifts." Ah, Melkor, you're glorious and funny and Sauron knows you well in at least some aspects XDDDDDD

"Sauron had touched the proper strings, and it would take just a few more caresses to finish melting the ice." Another perfect sentence. akljlkjkjskjdfjkj

"the Children of Ilúvatar had all such a regular and monotonous build, that Melkor sometimes wondered how did they recognize their children and wives." Ah Melkor, you racist XDDDD

"-Dost thou recognize them? I have put them on me as courtesy towards thee, so that thou feelst just like at thy father's home, now that thou art so far away" Amazing, amazing, amazing! You insert new characters with such ease and you make them

100% in character and so captivating and entertaning and real. I love this whole exchange between Maedhros and Melkor and Sauron, and I love the illogical logic of why Maedhros ended up on Thangorodrim:

"-I don't know. I changed my mind. Now I want to hang him by the wrist. It's something I've wanted to do for some time." Ah, I remember this idea of his from chapter 1, aksjdlkajs love itttttt :333333 And its fun how it seems so very random at first this change of mind (very melkorish) and then we find out he was in fact doing it on purpose! Kickass.

"Melkor stormed out the room, and spent at least two hours stuck in a hot bathtub, cursing in the ancient language of the Valar, that fortunately almost nobody understood anymore." Aw damn, it would have been so perfect if not for orc intestines!

Poor Sauron, they were getting so well along/closer until that happened XDDD

Whispers of power to the orc - when will you stop being so damn epic and coming up with those powerful, beautiful ideas?!

And Sauron listening to Melkor's chant, having all those barely contained feels and remembering the past he'd rather keep out... I can't express all the feelings this makes me feel ;u;

creation of dragons: perfect,lol melkor, he wanted a part of everything in them XDDD so random and chaotic XDD

Now, another most precious scene that absolutely played out like a movie in my head and still is:

"There in the darkened caverns, together, they watched for hours the iridescent reflection of the metallic scales,waving as silvery ghosts under the watched the hypnotic pupils of the great snakes shining for a second in

the darkness, and then disappearing." ;u;;; And how Melkor one of those times came so very close to Sauron, how it was almost intimate... I am so torn, I wish Melkor had not gone away then XDDDDD But then, he probably has Mandos in his mind and hanging out with Sauron is just to while away the time. Even if now that he unlocked that way of thinking, he finds himself somewhat fascinated by Sauron (in those moments he doesnt hate him) and maybe finds the strange image of Sauron's closeness alluring... They should just have a threesome with Mandos and end the sexual tension already okay? XDDDDD Ok kidding. This fic is perfect, I cannot predict how it will go! I love not being able to predict things ashdjakshjdh More more more, I need more of this already ;u;;; But a part of me still hopes Melkor will stop being a dick to Sauron at some point and that he'll appreciate him...

The creation of Sun and everything it entailed (and its different effect on Melkor's troops), sheer greatness! All the ideas again, all the comparisons! "It was the eye of the Valar, the eye of the Valar upon him, Melkor, and now they could see him, now they could pierce him with their stares wherever he as, they could see him inside and outside, and he would have no

secrets for them anymore, no, no secrets at all."

And Melkor's breakdown then... wow, also fitting, a touch of madness.

And how Sauron can't wake him up before that! Awesome idea, I mean, how do you even wake a god up it can't be that easy!

Those small scenes and details you put there are making this story come alive and become a true miracle X333

"And the slave Elves, who, of course, welcomed the new eyesore of the Valar as something beneficial." Ahahaha XD

Fingolfin walked away though? Since you're not straying away from the canon I am just assuming he will return later... woah, probably now that Sauron is locked away! So Melkor will be fighting him alone? laksjdlkjsalkdj I need the next chapter ;u;;

Please never stop writing this, we'll do everything to try and get you more readers but even if we fail, please please never stop writing, I hope our reviews motivate you a bit!

Ok, so now I sobbed and begged for more and I can continue XDDD:

"How
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