Reviews for Dragons heart but a human soul
Fruits.Baskets1 chapter 22 . 7/1
Are you going to add more or not but whether you choose to or not its interseting
hc.dbz.chickie chapter 21 . 6/5
Okay, I read through the whole story, because it seemed like a unique concept- and I don't like to discourage people, but this story could use some work. It's very creative, but it is also disjointed and lacking enough actual resemblance to HP that it should be considered almost a stand-alone story rather than HP fanfiction. I get that people like to put their fave characters into situations they create themselves and I myself do it regularly- so I'm not trying to come off as critical. But again, the whole franchise is called Harry Potter and you didn't even keep his name- and most characters were OOC. You could be a good writer if you worked with a good beta or did your own originals, so don't give up- but when writing fanfiction, you should please label correctly and make sure readers know right off the bat that your story is AU and characters are OOC. Good effort for a first try though. :)
hc.dbz.chickie chapter 3 . 6/5
Sorry- gotta double check- this was beta'd by your dad? It must be awesome to have a dad that is accepting of you writing gay fanfiction!
Pleasanttrouble chapter 20 . 4/23
I'm curious. Regarding the baby girls name. Have you ever seen ladyhawke?
Guest chapter 2 . 4/17
When you wrote out the letter to Harry from Tom that you mixed up the date of his birth, one September 3rd the other October 31st just thought I would point that out
SlashFan chapter 1 . 1/25
Hi!

Sorry, but after reading all your reviews I just had to write something. I don't know which stories the majority of your readers are used to, but your story is really not a good one. I have read many good stories and yours is far from it. You have absolutely no concept, almost no plot. Do they even have lessons? It is like one revelation after another and that's all, your story is about. Then there are these absolutely confusing changes in point of views. And you should really work on your storyline your spelling and your grammar.
Lara chapter 18 . 9/14/2014
I love stories were Sirius is brought back from behind the veil, he has always been one of my favorite characters.
Guest chapter 21 . 8/7/2014
Loved it! XD loved how you timed skipped it to the birth scene! :)
hauntedpumpkin56 chapter 21 . 8/5/2014
I loved this story. great work. thanks for posting. Harry is so cute.
Moka-girl chapter 1 . 7/29/2014
You should go back to your first chapters and edit them. They need it, badly. The sentences are way too long, and consist of several, crammed into one. Also, the constant change of points of views is confusing - if there are changes, then do the changes once every 1000 words (and that would still be considered too short for many people).

You also need to work on the characters. It sounds like you wanted to create cool characters, give them super cool abilities just because you can, but with no thought for how they are completely OOC (out of character, they do not act like they should in this given situation). Also, the letter Harry writes is not like him at all - he starts joking and stuff to an ennemy? He wouldn't do that. If you read the books, you can clearly see why. At least give a proper reason for writing a letter.

If I couldn't contact people over the summer, I wouldn't start contacting people I hate.

Also, Voldemort killed many people before James and Lily died. He did not start because of their death. Even so, just because he has a 'reason' does not justify killing, or make it seem more romantic. There are many other flaws and plotholes in your arguments that just make the first chapter unbelievable and hard to enjoy.

So yes, despite the spelling in this first chapter being somewhat okay, you really need to work on all these other aspects, and add more punctuation. Also, careful with the verbs, you often switch between past and present when it should stay one of them.

I'm sorry if this sounds like a flame. It isn't. If it was, I'd send insults. I took the time to write this message so that you would work of the points mentionned, and improve.
angelazzarello94 chapter 20 . 6/25/2014
I want a sequel please
babygirlloveme6 chapter 20 . 6/8/2014
I would love more of this it was a very good story and I want to know what happens after. Please let me know if you posted them so I can start reading them as well.
redcherry4 chapter 20 . 5/15/2014
i would love if you did a sequal and a prequeal. Its not fair that sirius got to come back but not james.
magicanimegurl chapter 20 . 5/12/2014
I love it! Write on! Since this one is complete, changetge status. Make a sequel if possible to answer more questions on what happens to the light and marriage!
Remus' daughter chapter 20 . 5/8/2014
There's gonna be more? Hogwarts is screwed royally screwed
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