What a lovely Story. I must thank you dearly for even writing it and post here for everone too see and read. It is one of the best Harry Potter fanfictions I have ever seen. I enjoyed that there was slash but the People matured or changed Charakter. It was all written yery Real and Heart-warming. I feel bad for you, that English Is your only Language. I hope you have still an good life with your Daughter. Bye and I wish you the best for the Future and I hope everone in your Family will have a long and peaceful Life.
Greetings out of Germany, exactly Alfeld/Leine in Lower Saxony. :)

With only an occasional bit of dialogue present, this 'story' reads more like a dry historical account. Every character except Ron seems to speak in the exact same manner (word choice/tone) - including the Goblins. The first chapter indicated that this would be a story about Hermione rather than a series of fixing-things-that-offended-the-author events and a random epilogue. And boy was it random... with so few character-driven scenes, the pairing at the end was unexpected.

There wasn't a natural pacing in the story as it stands, more like jumping from bulletpoint to bulletpoint to address your qualms with the original tale. I'm not expecting that this will be - or even needs to be - rewritten. Just be mindful with how you choose to narrate events, set scenes and transition between actions and consequences.

The angry author notes at the start also don't help matters. Aside from the tone it sets, it distracts from the actual story you're trying to tell. Plus, some people honestly want you to improve as an author and your getting upset at constructive feedback seems so petulant. I *like* your ideas in this story, I just wish they had been fleshed out and presented in a better manner.

A very enjoyable tale.

I'll admit bully bashing fix-fics aren't always my favorite thing. but this was pretty solid. Also your use of legalese and world building was great and I hope to use similar ideas in my own fics. You clearly had fun and good ideas.

I would say you may want to improve if your dialogue sounds age appropriate, everyone talked like a 30 year old.

Hogwarts addressing its internal issues is an interesting concept for a story. But Snape getting beaten in an Alley to the point it made news was hilarious to me in a way I'm sure makes me a bad person.

I can see where this is going. Bullying is not OK... unless you're a character the author doesn't like. Then it's fine. Funny even.

Couldv'e done without the childish Snape bashing.

esta muito bom, amei de verdade sua historias,mas deixe-me perguntar
onde esta o senhor Remus lupin?
nao li sobre ele

Interested to learn more about Hermiones magical family

An interesting story and I look forward to seeing what you post in the future.

good work

Undercutting prices in the NHS?
How does that work?
We charge you half of nothing?

Serves that jerk right to not be hired anywhere, he treated everyone like crap just because he had a poor childhood and didnt get the girl he wanted.

A bit fluffy for an ending, but a very good story anyway!

Thanks for finishing this entertaining story. I enjoyed it and hope you continue to write.