|Reviews for BIRTHDAY GIRL|
| twin268 chapter 10 . 1/29/2015
man i love this story and i see that it has been awhile since youve updated i hope you havent decided not to finish this story. i know this may sound bad but i love how different this story is and how dominating jacob is but also just wanting her to love him so i hope to see an update soon because i cant wait to see where bella ends up and to see if she will be punished or not.
| fanfictionfan4444 chapter 10 . 12/5/2014
Please continue this story. I have been hanging from this cliff a long time and my hands are slipping. :). Seriously I would love to see additional chapters of this story.
| zacefronsgirl101213 chapter 10 . 10/23/2014
The cabin, or hospital.. I think going to the auction after all the emotional stuff, would end bad for her. :(
| twilighted4ever chapter 10 . 8/13/2014
Really glad I found this! Can't wait for more!
| jharv241 chapter 10 . 6/2/2014
Excellent chapter! To my favorite story! I think she should wake up in front of the council. Clearly she disobeyed her master by taking off. I love, love, love this story. I know Jacob wanted to kill Quil for doing that. But Jacob is also at fault for putting the collar around her letting the others know that he was thinking about selling her. Please update soon! Please!
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/26/2014
What going to happen next can't wait
| xxShilaScreamsXx chapter 10 . 5/18/2014
Awesome! I think she should wake up in the same place where she passed out. Please keep writing!
| Guest chapter 10 . 5/18/2014
I loved it and cant wait to read more ;)
| sweetdreams1 chapter 10 . 5/16/2014
Smug expression huh. I would have loved to have wiped it right off his cocky face. Like I dunno...tiptoed into his bathroom and thrown my flat iron into the shower with him dialed to it's freaking hottest setting!
There ya go Bella. Shut him right the fudge down in the bath didn't you sweetie.
Pffffft...gift my ass...his elders and mentors should be neutered for the cruel, spirit breaking methods used on these poor girls past and present. Why the hell would she want what your calling a 'gift', Jacob? Not this way...not like that! You just finished beating her butt to a bruised pulp and now you think she would actually want or enjoy you touching her intimately?!
*head butts desk*
Oh heavens...a couple of those outfits certainly scream "look at me , I hump poles for a living"! This woman has been wearing sophisticated designer clothing...and carries herself with poise and grace. True her husband is a cheating creap...but that's still a lot better than what Jacob has shown her so far. Besides scaring her to death by threatening and terrorizing her, beating her, demeaning her he goes a step further with a closet full of hooker clothes. Oh and while we are at it...let's rip even more from the poor girl by putting a dog collar around her throat and issuing dog obedience commands.
Now let's add a leering jerk into the mix along with some other strange men and another girl that looks to have already been turned into a subhuman with no self respect. Cue the black hood and we are off to meltdown mode at an alarming speed.
Q...well I expected as much. After all we learned early on that he totally botched the training of his own 'chosen'. If I recall the poor girl (Amanda) had a complete mental breakdown from his cruel training methods. Even let Paul torture her.
Bella's reaction to Quil was so spot on! The poor girl has been thru hell in the last 72 hours. Now she's basically blind under a hood with a huge, strange crude man who is deliberately mentally abusing her. AND...getting ready to sample his ALPHA's chosen?! God...Jacob when you do take the role of leader...please forbid Q to take another mate!
Her complete breakdown in 'slave protocol' is again so realistic. She passed intelligent reasoning the minute he took away her sense of sight.
Jake! Did anyone else notice?! We got some JAKE time. Oh hell yeah. When she broke protocol in her total breakdown and called him by his real name...he responded with 'Bella'. Not pet...but Bella. *grins* Huge...that's huge! He reached out to her as an equal in that moment. Brief as it was.
The beatdown. God...can we get a description of Q's condition next chapter? The slimeball. I hope J did some real damage. Speaking of damage. *cringes* Uhhh...B honey I know you were operating on the basest primal level babe...but seriously...running with a damn black bag over you head? LOL...lights out. Can you say concussion. *smh*
And...once again her given name was used instead of the derogatory 'pet or slave'.
Hmmmmm...I think cabin. She's obviously not in good enough medical condition to take in anything that's happening inside the auction building a this point.
But she needs medical supervision for that obvious concussion once she gets there. Has to be done at the cabin. Otherwise everything gets exposed. Of course I expect pompous Sam to be mouthing off at Jacob about how unacceptable it was for her to use his given name like that and speaking without permission, yada yada yada. Spewing some garbage about her needing severe punishment for the breach in rules. *ass wipe*
I hope that opens J's eyes a bit further. Maybe a huge argument between those 2 and Bella overhearing a bit of it in her semi conscious state?
Jacob dragging Q before the council for attempting to violate his chosen?
Burying her alive kinda ends the story. D E D Bella epilogue.
RL sucks but happens and takes precedent. Big chapter full of deep plot. No apology needed to your readers! You delivered a great chapter. Rocked it.
And I LOVE how you surprised me with Bella's knock out at the end! HA...MUAH for giving me that.
| Cassandra chapter 10 . 5/14/2014
I vote the auction
| kouga's older woman chapter 10 . 5/16/2014
She should wake up the same place she passed out. More please!
| hufflepuffpride21 chapter 10 . 5/16/2014
I would say same place she passed out
| Jacobzlover chapter 10 . 5/15/2014
Being buried alive would be pretty interesting,lol. But I doubt Bella will recover from such a fate to become a willing submissive seeing that she wont ever see the light of day again.
Okay sooo this is pretty damn dark. Even though Jacob seems like a kinder master, I have yet to see any hopes for Bella. No matter how sexy jacob may be this situation is pretty damn terrifying. I really dislike this Jacob which is pretty crazy since I have yet to read a jacob I didnt like in the 5 yrs since Ive started reading twilight fanfiction. No insults or anything but I've got to get use to this new personality. Which has me intrigued. Your other stories are pretty awesome so have faith that this Jacob will eventually appeal to me. I'm pretty confused as to why Jacob wants to sell her so quickly, why is he so surprised that she is so reluctant? Doesn't he say she'll get use to it eventually? Who in there right mind accepts such a world without having a choice? Does he think slavery is a reward? Seriously? Ok Im so sorry for my rambling but I crave more answers. Please update as quickly as possible, I understand how RL is but your story is so compelling, appealing, entertaining? Just a few words to describe my thoughts on your fic. ;)
| PastOneonta chapter 10 . 5/15/2014
She should wake back at Jacob's. He is not ready to sell her or turn her over to someone else, or set her free for that matter! That may be boring but she has my sympathy and this auction is too much. Interesting so far.
| Taino Delsan13 chapter 10 . 5/15/2014
Why she did that I know she scared hecka be 2 but the survival 101 you have to act like you really like it and gain his sign a escape route and get the heck out. Good job looking forward for what is Jacob going to do now with Bella thanks you for updating