|Reviews for Women and Children First -- Mature Chapters Only|
| Azucar chapter 8 . 11/20/2014
Ive only read these 8 blissful 'M' chapters but I think Id enjoy the full story too. Wish u had intertwined these m chapters w the full story but I enjoyed it anyway. Love scenes were fantastic and what I did pick up from the story was very well written. Great job!
| phoenixx2812 chapter 8 . 8/15/2013
I relly love how you write the M-chapters, in fact you're one of my fave writers to write about their intimate moments.
And I'm really looking forward to their talk and what Patricia meant with her cryptic lines.
| CrazerCat chapter 8 . 8/15/2013
I kind of thought they were due for a private moment. ha ha It's the last calm before the big storm, I assume. I love all the discoveries between Patricia and Jane and then Jane and Lisbon. That whole "special powers" aspect as been extremely interesting.
| MartyMac49 chapter 8 . 8/14/2013
Oh. Oh. Oh My Goodness. Read both versions - and this one is definitely my fav! You do write mature extremely well. As for the chapter itself... It just makes me hungry for the next one. Jane's mom is fantastic, she could certainly be a more controlling mother. I like the way she is guiding him. Can't wait for the next one!
| Marcia Santos chapter 8 . 8/14/2013
"Your wife and child are not all you need to let go of, Patrick."
I wonder what else she meant.
Please post chapter 47 asap, , what can I say? My love for this fic is always in the air, thank you .
Even if I wasn't Brazilian I would be born a nasty person but this M chapter, their moment was so so beautiful, love your writing, sorry I wrote too much.
| Kadesch chapter 7 . 7/16/2013
Just HOT HOT HOT! Thanks for posting these chapters as well!
I really think all women are on the same page: Jane just MUST be an amazing lover! ;-)
Great job! More please!
| jefa chapter 7 . 7/2/2013
well I can only say thank you ... really did not expect to find such quality writing around here.
I have read all the chapters in one day!...
| CrazerCat chapter 7 . 6/25/2013
I read this when you first posted (was so excited to see a new chapter and an M chapter to boot) and then my life intervened and I didn't leave a review! I really enjoyed it - from Jane and his mother learning more about each other, as well as the revelations about his father not knowing about his abilities. Patricia seems like a good person that was in a bad situation. And it's always good to see Jane and Lisbon connecting. The "You know I love you, right?" was nice, too. Wasn't expecting it and was intrigued to see Jane letting Lisbon off the hook from replying by saying he already knows how she feels. Hmmmm...
| Guest chapter 7 . 6/23/2013
This was great! I love your M scenes, this chapter was very sensual and intimate. I'd like to see them talk about their relationship a bit more too.
| Guest chapter 7 . 6/23/2013
| marcia santos chapter 7 . 6/23/2013
I love this fic and of course I love your M chapters.
Cold lasagna? I couldn't eat that no cold food for me, lol.
I'm glad you are back as I said already, i hope you keep posting with the same frequency as before, can't wait to know what is coming.
| dadby chapter 6 . 5/30/2013
First of all, yay for Lisbon calling Jane Patrick! Second, Patricia shouldn't be forgiven so easily...also, awesome hot chapter! Thanks for sharing!
| judy washington chapter 4 . 5/20/2013
As Lisbon said, "'That was incredibly hot.'" Yep; and for exactly the reason she states. And both her lines on this topic were perfectly placed.
As to the less sexy but equally intimate parts-and yes, this was a GREAT chapter:
I loved what Jane tells Lisbon about how what his mother said is something she would hate that he knows. I loved your description of the manner in which he holds her and tells her what his mother said. I loved Lisbon's reaction and the perfect choice made in having her confirmation of the truth being wholly without words. Both characterizations were absolutely dead-on. Outstanding.
I loved the setup for Jane's revelation of his truth with Lisbon's desire to cure their "imbalance". Creative and perfect for both the story and the characters. But, the icing on the cake is Jane's decision to tell Lisbon all of it (he "intuited it was something Lisbon needed to know". Really? Go Jane! And go Ruby; as is so frequently the case, just when I think something can't possibly get better, it does. I'm not sure I've ever seen multiple reveals handled so deftly. It is one of the things that make reading your writing so endlessly entertaining.) Since he had already leveled the playing field with the initial reveal by telling Lisbon something they both know he would not have otherwise told her (pulling out a, "'Jesus Jane,'" for his trouble), telling her the full story was not actually necessary, and leaving it at that and still making his point was something that Jane, even in his fractured state, could easily have accomplished. But he tells her everything anyway.
I see Jane's truth as comprised of five pieces-the motivation for the move to LA, his balking at Angela's request he quit again, the aspect of his personality these relate to, that Lorelei is an example of this, and of course the present impact his personality trait has had on his desire to be in another relationship. As a good conman, Jane could have related any portion of any of these truths, without risking more than embarrassment regarding the specifics of things Lisbon already knew about him. If Lisbon had given his 'timeline' more thought before Jane told her how many fewer cars he had driven, Lisbon might easily have wondered about the lower number on her own, as I think his faithfulness to Angela is something Lisbon would have assumed even without his affirmation of it during their earlier discussion. Still, although he knows that she knows he would not have otherwise have shared the brazenness with which he used women as a means to an end, the fact that he regularly and coldly played his marks in his days as a conman, is something he knows Lisbon already knows about him. Given her familiarity as a homicide detective with the jealousy and sluttiness of people as a species, to say nothing of Jane's behavior with Lorelei and Lisbon's own discomfort with it ('uninvolved' with Jane or otherwise), Jane could reasonably have assumed Lisbon would find Angela's first request that Jane quit or even Jane's admission that, unchecked, his behavior would have ended them unsurprising. But, while I think Jane could probably have relied upon Lisbon's ultimate acceptance of his rejection of Angela's second request (after all, I'm fairly certain that, in canon, Jane tells Bosco that Angela's plea for him to quit in Malibu are part of the notes in his interview in Angela's case files and, even if Lisbon hadn't read these, I think canon Jane again refers to this same point, while in Lisbon's presence, to Styles as well) because I assume he knows she already knows about it and even that he is ashamed of it; but, he is genuinely ashamed, and mentalist, or no, revealing the full truth of things that shame us, particularly when there is an understandable lesser shame that someone already knows about that we can hang our guilt hat on, is never the preferred choice.
The paragraph that begins, "'But as Charlotte grew…'" is so stunningly perfect that I despise the idea of parsing it to tell you why that is so, but I think when Jane uses the concise, "'All of it,'" following his brief overt admission of his own thinking at the time, 'What had she ever given up for me?', to sum up what Patricia had seen and the shame even the most shameless of us carry around about our internal selfish reactions to those we love-and almost NEVER share-he reveals, if not a remarkable trust in Lisbon, then a clear desire for her acceptance and redemptive forgiveness of his human failings. That you have him do this with such brevity only underscores the hugely private piece of information that he is conveying. [Talk about, "'has seen the worst side of me and still loves me'"; for the record, I think Lisbon-and, well, any woman watching-fell in love with Jane upon hearing these words so long ago. p.s., I noticed that Jane also said, 'what Angela knew']
I believe Jane already knows Lisbon knows the 'aspect of personality' Patricia has drawn from her 'observations'-that Jane will go too far-and even that Lorelei is an example of this (p.s., LOVED the construction of Jane's retelling of this and the reader flashback it invites to Patricia's prior chapter, "'Oh.'"), but since I also think Jane already knows that Lisbon sees herself as being the person trying to stop him from going too far with Red John (and he has relied upon her to keep him from going over the cliff, to a point of his choosing), and already knows what happened when he set aside her concerns about Lorelei, his admission with respect to Patricia's conclusion relating to his eschewing relationships since Angela, followed immediately by his active inquiry into Lisbon's "thoughts on the subject" suggested to me that the "refuge" Jane is considering is far more than transitory. It will be interesting to see him figure out how to get what he wants without scaring Lisbon off.
Finally, I love this line: "'Something more has been going on for awhile now. We've just chosen not to acknowledge it. For our own reasons. And this is not an escape for me.'"
Ok, really, finally, LMAO about the locked door. There is a reason I love Lisbon!
| Guest chapter 6 . 5/18/2013
You write the best steamy scenes!
| CrazerCat chapter 6 . 5/18/2013
Yeah for another M chapter! I think they can go ahead and challenge that daily record at any time. Lol. Still don't like Ryan. Ha ha