|Reviews for The Black Lily|
| Georgasaurus chapter 1 . 2/26
I genuinely hope you kill yourself. I think the world would be a better place without disgusting cretins like yourself. You're the type of person that makes me want to puke. You're horrible and I hope you die a slow, painful death. I would laugh so hard. Seriously. I promise you.
| windom929 chapter 1 . 8/30/2013
Not bad so far dude its pretty good
| THE LITERATE UNION IS RETARDED chapter 1 . 5/6/2013
This game is called “Things That Can Write Better Than You”. The rules are simple. Please correctly select which choice can write better than you:
A. My left testicle
B. A toilet-full of chunky diarrhea
C. An inbred midget clown who swims in choice B
D. All of the above
If you chose the correct answer, D, then you have won the following prize:
A spam review!
Congratulations! Please continue to avoid the dictionary as if it were an oozing, puss-filled sore on an old hooker’s ass and good grammar? Well, run away from it like it’s a festering syphilitic itch you just can’t scratch in public. Or in words you can understand: your fic sucks donkey balls, and that’s what you wanted me to think, right? Because otherwise, I’d have to believe this was an actual attempt at writing and laugh the crap right out of myself.
| THE LITERATE UNION SUCKS chapter 1 . 4/9/2013
One morning, Miley, the fat ugly lesbian, woke up from a bad dream. She dreamt she was being raped by Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden.
As we all know, Miley Stewart is a cocaine-addicted, contraceptive bitch who fell out of someone's vagina by accident.
Anyway, when Miley got out of bed, she stepped in Blue Jeans's piss and shit. "GODDAMMIT!" Miley screamed in her stupid hillbilly voice.
Miley walked into her bathroom and noticed she had a zit the size of Mount Everest. "WHAT THE FUCK!" Miley screamed. Miley tried to pop the zit and when she did, it started bleeding a lot. There was nothing in Miley's bathroom for her to wipe the blood off with so she ended up having blood ooze all over her face.
Miley walked downstairs and tried to find something for breakfast. There was nothing for Miley to eat because her dad didn't love her enough to feed her. Miley had Down Syndrome and was too retarded to fix breakfast for herself so she went back upstairs and ate Blue Jeans's piss and shit.
After Miley's so-called "breakfast", her whore of a bodyguard, Roxy, took Miley to the tattoo parlor so she could get a tattoo of Satan on her ass. The tattoo artist screwed up because he wasn't trained well enough and he ended up sticking a very sharp needle up Miley's bare ass. "WAAAH! ROXY! I GOTSA NEEDLE STUCK UP MY WEE-WEE!" Miley screamed like the whiny, annoying little bitch that she is.
Miley cried and warbled all the way to the hospital. "GET THIS FUCKING NEEDLE OUTTA MY FUCKING WEE-WEE!" Miley bitched.
The doctors got so annoyed with Miley's constant bitching that they had to choke her with a belt in order to shut her up. Miley had to get major surgery on her ass and during the surgery, she was in horrible pain because the doctors didn't give her any anesthetic and no matter how hard she tried, Miley couldn't cry because she had a belt stuffed inside her throat the whole time.
Unfortunately, the doctors were unable to remove the needle from Miley's ass. Miley cried and warbled even more than before and blamed Roxy for the fact that she had to live the rest of her pathetic life with a needle stuck up her dirty ass.
Roxy started slapping Miley really hard because she couldn't handle her bitching anymore. "WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY, YA SKANK?" Roxy shouted. "GO TO HELL, YA NIGGER!" Miley shouted.
Miley shot Roxy with a handgun and killed her. Then, Miley went back home and jammed Roxy's dead body into the garbage disposal, where it was cut into a million pieces.
Miley went onto her computer and started looking at porn sites. Miley was so fascinated by all the porn she saw that she became addicted to it. The porn sites Miley visited had a bunch of viruses that eventually killed her computer. "WHAT THE HELL! I NEED MORE PORN!" Miley shouted when her computer died.
Miley craved more porn and started thinking erotic thoughts about that bastard, Rico. Miley thought Rico would make a good sex toy so she called him on the phone.
"Hey, Rico, I wanna play a game with you," Miley said. "Okay," Rico said. Rico came over to Miley's house. "What game are we gonna play, Miley?" Rico asked. "It's called sex," Miley answered.
Miley pinned Rico down and punched him hard in the face. A loud crunch came from Rico's jaw and blood came rushing out of his mouth. Miley then pulled off Rico's pants and grabbed his soft and small cock. Miley shoved Rico's dick into his mouth and started to suck it. Rico started to scream but Miley smashed her fist into Rico's mouth to shut him up. This time, she broke Rico's jaw. Miley sucked and sucked Rico's dick hard. Then she took the cock out of her mouth. Miley got a knife out and held it up to Rico. She then stabbed the knife into Rico's foot. The blade went all the way through it and blood leaked on the floor from the stab wound. Rico screamed and cried in horrible pain. Miley then started to peel the skin off Rico's foot with the knife. Each time, a bit of skin flew off to show the flesh and veins and blood inside and Rico even cried harder. Soon, his foot had no skin on it and was just a mess of bones, blood, flesh and veins. Rico just kept on screaming and crying. Miley put Rico's skinned foot into a microwave. She then turned it on and held down Rico's leg so he could not get it out of there. His foot started to smoke and then it lit on fire. It burned through his flesh and went to the bone. Miley then took Rico's foot out of the microwave and now it was just charred bones with bits of black flesh hanging off them. Miley then took the black bones into her hand and snapped it off Rico's leg. Then, she stabbed the knife into Rico's ballsack and cut it open from top to bottom. Miley then took one of Rico's balls into his hand and yanked it off. Miley shoved Rico's testicle into the his mouth. Rico gagged on it because he could not chew it and then, Miley puked all over his naked body. Miley then stabbed Rico in the right arm. Blood leaked out slowly from the wound and down his arm like a river. After that, Miley got out a ball point pen and turned Rico's head over to the side. She stabbed the pen deep into Rico's ear, breaking Rico's ear drum and making lots of blood leak out. Rico screamed and held his hand up to his ear in pain. Miley then stabbed Rico's right eye and took it out of the socket. Blood leaked from the empty eye socket and then, Miley crushed the fleshy eye in her hand. Miley picked up Rico by the neck and held him against the wall. She then smashed the knife into Rico's mouth and blood spurted out and then, Rico puked up blood all over Miley. Rico's body then went limp and he was dead. Miley laughed madly at the dead body and then, ripped off the head from it. Miley let Rico's body lay on the floor in a pool of blood and cooked his head in the microwave. Then, Miley ate Rico's head. "Mmmm, that tasted just like chicken!" Miley said in a retarded way.
Miley went into Blue Jeans's shed and started kicking him. "FUCK YOU, BLUE JEANS, YOU FUCKING DOUCHEBAG OF A HORSE! THIS IS FOR MAKING ME STEP IN AND EAT YOUR PISS AND SHIT!" Miley screamed at her retarded horse.
Blue Jeans got mad at Miley for kicking him so he went over to Miley and showed her his groin. Blue Jeans stripped Miley of her clothes until her pussy was fully shown. After that, Blue Jeans fucked Miley and masturbated on her. Then, Blue Jeans threw Miley onto the ground face-first and put his testicles in her butt, thus humping Miley's butt and having butt sex with her. After that, Blue Jeans flipped Miley over and kissed her on the lips. Then, Blue Jeans deep-throated Miley with his penis, which was so long that it went all the way down Miley's mouth and came out through her ass. When the horse's dick inched close to Miley's pussy and finally penetrated it, blood spurted out from Miley's asshole. For the next several hours, Blue Jeans pushed his cock back and forth into Miley's pussy. After Blue Jeans finally pulled his cock out of Miley's body, he pissed, shitted and puked all over her. Blue Jeans ran off after raping the crap out of Miley, who was laying on the ground and was covered in piss, shit and puke with her ass bleeding and stretched. Miley was so traumatized that she was nothing more than a blithering Jell-O mold.
A bloodcurdling scream came from inside the house. "MILEY CRAPPIN' STEWART, GET YER FUCKIN' ASS IN HERE RIGHT THIS MINUTE BEFORE I WHIP YOU, GODDAMMIT!" Robbie Ray shouted from inside the house. Miley went inside the house. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO RICO?" Robbie Ray cried. "FUCK OFF, DADDY! THE WORLD'S BETTER OFF WITHOUT THAT BASTARD ANYWAY!" Miley shouted. "THAT'S IT, MILEY! I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU, YA LITTLE CUNT! I'M GONNA DO TO YOU WHAT I SHOULDA DONE TO YOU THE DAY YOU WAS BORN!" Robbie Ray shouted.
Robbie Ray pinned Miley to the ground and tied her up so she couldn't move. Then, Robbie Ray got out his cooking knife and slowly started to cut off Miley's vagina. Miley screamed and cried in excruciating pain. Robbie Ray had cut off Miley's vagina and now, a stub of flesh with blood flowing out was all that remained of Miley's pussy. Robbie Ray shoved Miley's pussy into her mouth. Then, he punched her in the face which knocked out all of her teeth and made her mouth bleed badly. Robbie Ray got up and stomped on Miley's face which knocked her out and made more blood flow out. After that, Robbie Ray got a knife and stabbed Miley in the heart. Blood spurted up from the stab wound and Miley made weird wheezing noises and then, her body stopped moving so Miley was at least dead. Robbie Ray dragged Miley's bloody body into the kitchen and got out his wood cutting axe. Then, Robbie Ray cut off Miley's arms, legs and head. After that, he got out all the flesh and put it in a big pan. Robbie Ray cooked Miley's flesh and ate it. Then, he dumped the rest of Miley's body and Rico's dead corpse in a lake and no one ever found them.
Miley, Rico and Roxy spent the rest of eternity rotting in the deepest, darkest depths of hell and being mercilessly tortured by Satan and his demons. Everyone forgot they existed and they didn't even get funerals because they didn't deserve them anyway.
Hannah Montana was cancelled for being incredibly gay and the world was a lot better off without nobody's favorite poop star. Nyeh nyeh
| blkmgcwmn chapter 1 . 3/15/2013
I'm totally game for this! Can't wait for it to continue'
| Stelm chapter 1 . 2/17/2013
Nice starting chapter, seems to be different than your normal gta fan fic. A female character is interesting in itself. Her money struggle seems real, stickin up dealers and all.