|Reviews for Eldritch Designs|
| Maran Zelde chapter 5 . 10/23/2013
Whew, I'm glad some of the Glidedale ponies survived.
It's good to hear that there were eventual consequences for Silver Spoon's bullying.
I doubt Spike can figure out Twilight's code, because I didn't figure out the first paragraph until it was explained. The second paragraph wasn't as difficult to decipher, though: "Diane" and "six eggs" jumped out at me. Maybe the dragon monks can help him figure it out? I assume they're trustworthy. In any case, I do appreciate the thought you put into Twi's letter.
When I first started watching FiM I wondered why their society was so egalitarian when the unicorns seemed to have so much advantage that the other races didn't have. Although "Hearthswarming Eve" explained this well enough, it wouldn't surprise me if Fantastic Racism cropped up every now and then.
| Maran Zelde chapter 4 . 6/11/2013
Yay Applejack! D You write her dialogue well - it's not easy to find an author who can write her lines without looking ridiculous.
I love the idea of the bearers of the Elements using their special abilities together to form a new ability, like AJ's truth sensing and Rarity's sense of future need. There are likely many different combinations the Mane 6 could try together.
I also like the way you showed Discord's memory gaps.
Now I know a bit of background information about what led to the current events of this story. The biggest question that remains is what - or who - attacked Celestia? Also, I hope that a lot of the Glidedale ponies survived. I mean you can't just kill off all the Glidedale ponies "offscreen."
| Maran Zelde chapter 3 . 3/28/2013
This is my favorite chapter so far. It feels the most like a continuation/expansion of "Dangerous Business." Poor Pumpkin Cake is in way over her head.
The origins of the Elements of Harmony, Discord, and Star Swirl the Bearded are well explained. But Pumpkin only called the draconequus "Discord" because that's what everyone else called him. So if she went back in time and gave him the name, who came up with the idea to name him Discord? Or did the name spontaneously generate like the draconequus himself?
Anyway, I hope to see more of the Mane 6 and CMC soon.
| The Enduring Man-Child chapter 3 . 3/24/2013
Oh my goodness! Little Pumpkin Cake gave Discord his name in a dream where she was taken to the ancient past by the ley wardens! And we see the origin of Star Swirls as well.
I was right. I'm going to have to follow this story.
Keep up the good work.
| The Enduring Man-Child chapter 2 . 3/24/2013
I was right! This is going to be quite Tolkienesque. I take it the deer are the "elves" of your version of the Equestrian universe?
There's a prequel to this story? Now I have a lot of catching up to do!
| The Enduring Man-Child chapter 1 . 3/24/2013
Yay! Another war pony story! (War ponies are best ponies.) And this one's all mystically and everything, too!
It's nice to have another great story to follow. Stories that take Equestria seriously (in a Tolkienesque serious adult fantasy sort of way) are my favorite to read.
Naturally I thought the white pony in the center was Celestia. Poor Twilight! She has a heavy burden to bear.
As to Princess Celestia, I suppose I'll find out as I read on.
| Maran Zelde chapter 1 . 2/16/2013
“It's a Dangerous Business, Going Out Your Door” was the first FiM fanfic I ever read, and it remains the best. I've looked for other good adventure/questing FiM fanfics, but nothing comes close.
This fanfic feels more like a spin-off or AU of "Dangerous Business" than a true sequel. The style is different and it just doesn't have the same feel. As far as I can tell, you might as well have removed the references to Glidedale and Niles Nigellus and just made this a separate story. I don't usually say this, but this fanfic needs more exposition and build-up, rather than jumping ahead 25 years into a tumultuous situation and expecting the readers to figure out and care what's going on. In contrast, "Dangerous Business," for all of its epic glory and world-building, has a simple plot with high stakes. The readers are quickly drawn into the story and they care about what happens to Twi, Rarity, AJ, and Dash.
That said, I'll follow this fanfic for at least a little while to see where it goes. I am curious about what happened to the alicorns and Shiny.