Reviews for The Tender Trap
darkorangegreen chapter 22 . 6/10/2014
You captured Karai's sadness and loneliness perfectly to the point. It seems like she's in gold cage now, dreaming of freedom.
Hey, I finished the first part, it took a few days, but I finished! ;)
darkorangegreen chapter 21 . 6/10/2014
The Splinter and Leo moment almost made me cry, because while they're still family and still care for each other, there now this distance between then and I don't think it'll ever go away. This now something that will stand between, preventing them of becoming close like before again. All in all, it's heartbreaking how everyone's dealing with the aftermath ( Mikey hiding that in cooking... ), Leo becoming hardened and bitter because of everything that happened, but still hanging on to Karai which shows in details like that he's wearing clothes outside now. The message Karai left behind, it's sad that Leo interprets it the wrong way.
darkorangegreen chapter 20 . 6/10/2014
Oh, what are you doing to me? There's so much I want tell you, but can't think of how so that it make sense ...
Let's try:
First of all, the Casey and Donnie moment/interaction was so, so awkward, Donnie must have felt so humiliated. I know, I would have if I were in his shoes. And I assume in this story Casey doesn't even know about Donnie's feelings about his girlfriend (am i right?), which makes it even more ... well, awkward.
Next, it broke my heart how Splinter felt so out of place and kept his distance because of that. Sure, I didn't agree with some things he done and said in this fic, but still, Leo's his son and he's his father, they're family for crying out loud. I know, he loves and just wanted to protect Leo, even though I wasn't exactly fond of his methods.
I frickin' loved and adored the April and Donnie moment (i think it's no surprise for you by now, is it?) It was so bittersweet. I loved the chemistry you portray so well with them, I loved Donnie memorizing of good old days where everything was uncomplicated with them. Now I really like Casey (at least in 2k12 series, i don't know enough of him in other version to judge), but I noticed how the whole dynamic between Donnie and April shifted with his appearance, so I assume it was in other versions like that, too. And as for April, either she doesn't realize her feelings for Donnie (because it's obvious she has them, at least in this story) or it's a hard case of denial. Which one is it?
Last of all, Leo nightmare. Damn, PTSD already kicking in. But's no surprise after all he had been through. I don't know what would be safer for him: knowing that Karai never betrayed him or keep thinking she hates him. But Donnie made that decision, hope he won't regret it.
(whoa, this must be the longest review i have written here, hope it made sense to you)
RedWritingRebel chapter 17 . 6/9/2014
Another incredible chapter, SS! Once again you have me wanting to crawl into this story and beat more than a few people into oblivion. Please tell me Shredder is going to be punished somehow for this! I just -he deserves death! I honestly had trouble getting through that last torture scene.
And Karai... oh gosh, the girl just makes me want to sob. She's in such a horrible situation. :'(
Cheers, your RWR
RedWritingRebel chapter 16 . 6/9/2014
*stares at keyboard*
I don't know what to say, except wow. And I thought the torture scenes I'm cooking up were brutal. This... this... oh gosh, it was just painful. In a good way, mind you. Adding in the emotional torment really just staked me through the heart, ya know that? Oh boy... let's see. The characters were in characters, considering the situation. I mean, Leo ain't no crier, but come on, I can totally see some tears slipping from *anyone's* eyes if they were put under this! Shredder was perfectly evil and brutal and hate-able!
Job well done! And though I fear the next chapter, onwards I go.
Cheers! your RWR
RedWritingRebel chapter 15 . 6/9/2014
That was intense... I didn't expect things to develop as quickly as they did. Instead of a sinking feel, you just plunged me into absolute terror for these characters. I have chills up and down my arms, and I must admit, my head is... how do I describe this?... light and cold, like I just ran miles in the dead of winter.
You have me on the edge of my seat. I am freaking out for Leo and about ready to cry for Karai. My previous prediction is going to come true, isn't it? :(
A very dreary cheers!, from your Red Writing Rebel
RedWritingRebel chapter 14 . 6/9/2014
I swear, FF needs to add a Bookmarking feature, because I had to dig through the hundreds of reviews for this story to see where I left off. *sigh* Ya know, just a little button, perhaps next to the "Prev - Chapter - Next" thingy that will very simply save your position in a story. Not page position or anything too specific, but chapter number. Yes? Please? Anyone in the FF community getting this? *shutting up now and moving on to the review*

Go, Donnie! Go, Donnie! Go, Donnie! *cheers* Gosh yes, I am so glad he found the courage to say what I've been thinking this whole time.

Having said that... how do I put this? Um, wow, just shock and awe during Shredder's gutting scene. Gruesome and violent and oh so well written. I blushed and cringed at the same time. Argh, I mean, Shredder watching video evidence of Karai and Leo's little... show of love... awkward, man, just awkward. And I can't believe how high the stakes are getting now. More than just love and life, an entire empire is now on the line. I shudder just thinking of what Shredder plans on making Karai do to win the respect and fear of the Foot Clan. The evil little writer in me is whispering "He's going to make her execute Leonardo." The optimist is weeping in a corner, muttering something about everything turning out okay. ROFL, yeah right.

Lastly, I really like your little addition, as you so put it, to Shredder's hatred towards the turtle. It makes sense and is very interesting!
Cheers! your Red Writing Rebel
darkorangegreen chapter 19 . 6/8/2014
It broke my heart reading how Leo was tormented and then how Karai beat him up to get him closer to his brothers. My favorite scene here was the Donnie and Karai one though, there was just something so emotional and intense her pleading to him to tell Leo the truth. I think in this story so far, that's the most broken she've been.
darkorangegreen chapter 18 . 6/8/2014
The Donnie and April moment was very intense, you did an very good job in capturing Donnie's emotions in that. Poor Leo, after all he suffered already, there's now the humiliation with that blond woman. You also described very well what's going through Leo's head the whole time, especially when he's in front Karai and her father.
darkorangegreen chapter 17 . 6/8/2014
Mikey's determination to keep searching Leo was impressing as was Donnie's tactic to scare the foot ninja in such calm manner. Gross what happened to Markus, so I see why Karai wants to protect Leo from this fate, even if it means breaking his heart.
darkorangegreen chapter 16 . 6/8/2014
Whoa, that Shredder would go down that route to torment Leo ... It's just evil. I think the emotional psycho game he used on Leo was so much worse than the physical pain with the whip. You portrayed the the despair of Karai also really well.
darkorangegreen chapter 15 . 6/6/2014
Again, you wrote the emotions of each character so real, and from the outside it's really looking like an trap set by Karai.
darkorangegreen chapter 14 . 6/6/2014
I like it that Saki actually moved on and got over Tang Shen, found love again and then have it all destroyed by Splinter's sons. It's so cruel and ironical. You gave him more reasons to hate Splinter. I really like what you did with his character, that he's not only evil, but also has a little bit humanity in him. I also liked that Donnie called Splinter out on his hypocrisy. Splinter is another example of what you're doing with characters just the other way 'round, showing that he isn't perfect.
darkorangegreen chapter 13 . 6/6/2014
The nightmare gave me the chills, it was so descriptive and haunting. It broke my heart when Leo was practically forced to choose a side, but couldn't do it, also really awful for him when his brother just left, I could practically feel his helplessness about the whole the Foot knows about them and are making fun of it. Have a feeling when Shredder returns, hell will break loose. My favorite part was though Karai's realization that she really loves Leo. You wrote that short scene so beautifully and romantic, and it still was so Karai. Great job!
darkorangegreen chapter 12 . 6/5/2014
The moment Leo found out that Shredder is Karai's father felt intense and real, just like her fear of losing him. You did an especially good job at describing this part.
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