|Reviews for Hail to the (Zero) Queen|
| Fullmetal11791 chapter 2 . 6/1
I feel like there needs to be something in the first two chapters why Kerrigan is acting nothing like Kerrigan. The only explanation you've given is that she's trying to fit in by pretending to be a Lord/Lady...but that's not at all something Kerrigan would ever do. Honestly, you've written her to be so bland. Just some generic laid back woman with common sense and some semblance of power. You could replace every instance of the word Kerrigan with Wonder Woman, some female Jedi, or any other female protagonist with a super power that's capable of wielding a sword or a bow, and the story would have read exactly the same.
Maybe that changes later, I don't know. But there's been absolutely nothing that grabs my attention, at all, in these first two chapters. Nothing that says, "Hey look at this! One of the most badass woman in video games, the fucking Queen of Blades, is in Halkeginia, and she's gonna fuck some shit up! Check it out!" To be honest, I would have rather been reading about Saito these two chapters, because at least that offers a bare minimum amount of comedy over "generic OC who's not actually Kerrigan but who we're gonna call Kerrigan to attract readers".
Could have overlooked Kerrigan doing the whole "m'lady slave maid has rights and is a human being so treat her with respect" routine with the maid. Seems like every single Familir of Zero story has to get that out of the way, so whatever. But Kerrigan not turning Guiche into a bloodstain in the ground? Come on. Might as well be writing about Supergirl at this point.
| Parks98 chapter 1 . 3/10
Well shit this can only be terrifying.
| LanzCorporalAssWipe chapter 3 . 12/29/2016
Oh wait.. The rewrite is only up to chp 2? :(
That a major turn off. Hope you finish soon.
| LanzCorporalAssWipe chapter 2 . 12/29/2016
When was this rewrite posted? I actually saved you original story (good old save page) had i known you posted a rewrite i should have had read this sooner. Ive been reading you old one for some time when im bored and i got to say its better than the old one
| Reymen chapter 2 . 6/28/2016
The redoes was really amazing, hope you ever find time to finish it
| painfulldarksoul chapter 5 . 2/7/2016
How kissable breasts are, depends on their tinyness/the flattness of a girls chest. The maker of ZnT, knew this. Cute loli, that stopped growing at the age of 15, is her destiny. You committed heresy with this chapter.
| Karharot chapter 3 . 1/11/2016
I'm guessing that the re-done part ended in chapter 2 and the rest of the chapters is what remained of the original story.
I think that you made a little mistake by simply editing the chapters instead of posting this as a remake, as a result the old story is pretty much unreadable because its first two chapters are just missing. The differences in those two stories are far too great to treat them as anything else than two different works starting from the same point but then going on their separate paths, those paths may run parallel to each other but that's all. Reading them as one story just leaves the reader in a state of confusion at the chaos that is created by the differences and even mutually exclusive versions of stor progression.
The above issue aside, I must say that those 2 re-done chapters are really amazing very well written and truly worth reading. I really enjoyed reading them and I would be glad for the chance of reading the rest of this story if you will be willing (and able) to find time to finish it.
| Guest chapter 3 . 11/23/2015
You just redid the duel
| Guest chapter 7 . 7/23/2015
You've obviously never read familiar of zero Karin is a bit of a bitch while she loves her daughter's if she thought they were endangering crown or country shed gladly kill them and with a smile on her face thier father spoils them and would never hurt them though
| Guest chapter 5 . 7/22/2015
Its derflinger not delfinger
| Guest chapter 4 . 7/22/2015
The first couple chapters are good but then it gets really crappy
| IansInsane chapter 3 . 5/28/2015
Wait? Why is the fight happening again?
| IansInsane chapter 2 . 5/28/2015
This is awesome!
| SalemTheSpeakerOfTruth chapter 4 . 4/25/2015
Why would a Zerg want to follow Terran convention by naming things? Zerg are not divided by names; they are all The Swarm.
| KhazintheDark chapter 12 . 4/2/2015
That, is a long time for it to make contact. Has it been searching for the whole time Elliot has been there?