|Reviews for Treatment|
| SangNoire chapter 1 . 6/29/2013
OH MY GOD!
YOUUUU WROTE THIS?! You're not only a Fearshipper, you're also a fellow Illusionshipper... god how... how did I deserve the privilege of meeting you?! WHY ARE YOU SO AWESOME!
I absolutely love this. It's so damnably evil... it just fits perfectly.
| Cymoril Avalon chapter 1 . 5/7/2013
Now this is an interesting fic. I especially like the point of view it's written in - you don't come across that in stories very often, so it's always nice to see it once in a while. It's awkward here and there, but done rather well. My first impression is that this is all taking place in her mind - she never left the mind trap Dark Malik placed her in when she lost their duel, and she's currently experiencing a form of personal hell. This could be just one glimpse into the tortures that Dark Malik is putting her through. I rather like the concept. Well done!
| Crystia chapter 1 . 2/22/2013
Heyy, you pulled off a second-person fic. An accomplishment worthy of incredulous stares and jaw-dropping gaping. Way to break the rules and do it with flare. XD
Ohhh, I liked the canon-like references, i.e. Mai's amnesia and her torture. Muyyy interesante. ;)
That last line is really, really creepy. I'm so glad I read this in the morning and not before I went to bed. IT WAS THAT FRIGGIN' SCARY. Which is what you were aiming for, methinks, so nice job. :P
Wellll, anyway, good stuff.
| literalspoon chapter 1 . 2/22/2013
*calmly tosses an idea for a Round Five handicap over her shoulder, having read this* Gwaaaah! It was a good handicap, but there is no freaking WAY I'd want to attempt something that could be similar to what someone had done so bloody well in the previous round.
Speaking of things that were done so bloody well, I knew as soon as I saw the pairing that Mai would either get horribly tortured (manga canon) or lose her memory (anime). (It's a bit like how most fics involving Noa tend to have him stealing someone's body, y'know? XDD) Anyway, I was glad - VERY glad - that you chose to use the latter. What with what you hinted at in your PM, I'm not sure I could have taken the alternative very well.
By the way, making Mai's amnesia become a sort of... self insert's really not the right word... anyway, that was genius. Totally unexpected, and a pretty clever use of second - person POV. Only real concrit I can give is that the ending... I mean, I'm not fond of that sort of stuff, but that's not really the point. It's just that it seemed a little... fast? Not rushed, but a little fleeting for my liking. Maybe it was the language, or the broken up sentences, or maybe because you spent a fair while working your way up to it. Possibly a combination of all three.
'He's winking at you from over his shoulder, one brown eye sparkling from between his blonde bangs—a shade of blonde much nicer than that of the platinum color the bristly mane of the doctor currently sitting in front of you sports—and he's smiling that cute little smile.'
Just wanted to say this: I stared at that sentence for about twenty seconds, and then just died laughing, because a random scene from an AMV popped into my head, it had that exact picture in it... and it was set to 'Last Friday Night', (a rather upbeat song). I doubt having that one firmly stuck in my skull for the rest of the fic was your intention - but all the same, it happened. Likely because the description was so damn good that I could instantly recognize it as the image from that one AMV.
Well done, and good luck for the contest! :D
| tenderglories chapter 1 . 2/20/2013
Aaaaaand, here is the review that I have just been itching to write since you told me your idea for this little fic. You already know that I LOOOOVE this (yes, the capitalisation and excessive 'O's were completely necessary) and that thanks to you I have developed a new fondness for Illusionshipping. Sooo... I guess I'll just ramble incoherently about my favourite parts for a little while.
Firstly; the fact that you've used second person. It's so insanely original - I mean, I'VE never read another story that's used it - and also insanely creepy, considering the situation. But, in a good way, of course.
Secondly; THE WHOLE FIRST PARAGRAPH, MAN. I JUST... I don't know exactly what it is that I love so much about it, but you've made the description of something that should be mundane, like, totally enthralling. Yep. I also liked the reference to mould. It reminds me of a certain dairy product in our little collab fic, for some reason...
But anyway, back to the matter at hand. Next I'd like to skip to the ending and say that it is so creepily wonderful, and I feel a little shiver go up my spine every time I read it. "…It's not like you're going to remember any of this tomorrow anyway." - The idea that she'll have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA of what just happened to her is just, so freaky. And brilliant.
Oooh, one other thing that particularly stood out was the description of Yami Marik; "...Numerous piercings decorating his ears, one of which looks to be horribly infected." This gave me wonderful images, absolutely wonderful (NOTE SARCASM)... but in all seriousness, I loved Mai's impression of him, and also both their characterisations in general. Bravo, mon amie.
Also, before I forget, "Sound like they guzzle corroded nails..." THIS IS SO PERFECT. I WAS LIKE, "OOOH, SIMILIE." I think that Yami Marik totally sounds like that... specifically in the dub. xD
Anyway, I think I've ranted long enough. Good luck for the contest; I have faith in you, young grasshopper. xD