Reviews for Training
Gamemaker John chapter 2 . 2/27/2013
I love this original idea! I'm waiting to see how it will turn out. Watch out for spelling errors though.
richards25 chapter 2 . 2/27/2013
I like this idea, its one I haven't read before. Interesting to see how you made it about loss, not bloodlust. I really look forward to where this goes. Great work.
Radio Free Death chapter 1 . 2/27/2013
The intention is good in this chapter. It's rare to have it in the perspective of the parent of the trained kids. It needs work though. The emotions are barely there and when they are, it doesn't give the impression that these are real people. His son was murdered and he can't seem to conjure up anything but that he was good looking and had a good heart. This really needs to be developed, the relationship between the parents and their son. It's also this weird double standard that their son is a person, but not the other kids. Again, this could be further explained since it's really all about dehumanizing the enemy.

The mom says interesting things about how wrong it is, but then again, if she was so adamant on it, why didn't she complain about it while they were training their son to stand a chance? This story could really benefit from starting at a much earlier place. It's a good idea. The execution just needs more work.
Latinoman117 chapter 1 . 2/26/2013
Hmm interesting concept. I look forward to reading more on it.