|Reviews for A Marriage of Untrue Minds|
| ColdGoldLazarus chapter 1 . 3/23/2013
Well, uh, okay. Good work, but what did I just read?
| Hawki chapter 1 . 3/18/2013
The cyborg and Durandal…married…by s’pht…
You get points for that alone. XD
-Few sentences in, and I’m loving it already. Durandal’s snark is just perfect. The cyborg doesn’t really have a canon personality of course bar a few manual tidbits, but I can certainly see this applying to him. After all the insanity that’s been thrown at him from Tau Ceti to L’ho’won, this would just take the cake.
-Going through the story as a whole, there’s not much in I can really pick out. As in, I can say, “lol” at sentence a, but would be obliged to say “lol” for sentences b to z as well, if you catch my drift.
Providing what feedback I can though, from a writing standpoint, it’s written excellently. Grammar’s good, spelling’s good, and it flows well. Never did I feel it got bogged down or anything. From a character standpoint, it’s even better, as I mentioned above as to how you depicted Durandal and the cyborg. I also think you deserve some more credit for aspects of the cyborg’s personality, how Durandal subtlely raises the issue that there may not be a place for him back in UESC space in a sense. Killing pfhor is what he does. He was built to be a killing machine. Does he have a space outside that life? And of course, there’s the background humour. ‘Marathon’ certainly had its batch of humour spread throughout it, and you’ve conveyed that well.
So yeah. All in all, excellent job. May Durandal and the cyborg find happy marriage as they slaughter pfhor together. :)