|Reviews for Straw Hat Among Fairies|
| xXTheTyRantXx chapter 15 . 7/18
Every time I read one of your chapters, I always get tempted to go back and actually binge read/watch Fairy Tail. I never got super far into it, so a lot of these characters and things are lost on me regrettably. But you somehow make the world a lot more convincing and developed than Mashima could in the first 20-30 chapters (I don't even remember anymore because its been YEARS since I first tried Fairy Tail). The sad thing is is that I want to like his work because the potential is there but it simply didn't interest me enough.
Love the addition of adding soundtracks in the story. Makes the entire conflict actually seem more genuine and play out in the readers mind. I also enjoy the conflict with Wyverns and Erza's monologue/confession towards the end was just the icing on top. It was cute. Fantastic writing and showcase of feelings!
Now, as always, in order to keep the spirit of the review honest, I'll be listing some or rather one critique in general that I have. It's going to be a bit wordy so I can hopefully make the message more clearer. It's something I probably should have stated last chapter, but it really didn't jump out at me until I read this one. Also last chapter was short so I didn't really think it was necessary to analyze everything that went down. Anyways, the major thing that jumped out at me was the way Luffy references his past events to others. They are either too frequent or too casual when stating them that it almost feels unnatural. What I mean by this is that when he's having a conversation when somebody, he brings things up without any context unnecessarily. When I read them it sometimes pops in my mind "Why is he talking about this and why right now?" Especially when concerning people he shares close relationships to. It isn't something he would just openly talk about. Luffy really doesn't talk about his adventures unless something reminds him about it.
Let's look at things Like Luffy openly stating memories about Gan Fall, Vivi and Billy. Especially when no one hears him. It might be better for him to recall those memories in thought and thus giving him the idea to ride the Wyvern. But to just openly state that feels kinda unnatural.
The Red Dragon one was fine, just a little weird bringing it up in the context of them having to be silent. It might of been better for him to talk about this when they were fighting rather than hiding.
But things like talking about his brothers casually and openly, that's where the line needs to be drawn. Although Luffy thinks highly of his brothers, he has never openly mentions them to anyone, not even his own crew. In fact, the crew usually has to meet them before Luffy goes "Oh yeah we're brothers" or "Oh yeah, he's my Grandpa" you get what I'm saying? Its really rare for Luffy to bring up anyone he shares personal bonds with and I would say that only in situation where Luffy is genuinely reminded of people that he'd start talking about them. I'd even go as far as saying talking about Rayleigh is pushing these boundaries as well. Not as bad, mind you, but it still feels forced and unnatural. These things aren't going to kill the story for me believe, they're just little things that kinda made me raise an eyebrow up.
Another thing is that I kinda found Luffy to be a little bit more emotionally vulnerable than usual. I can understand as its to the relationship development but its still a bit off. When I read Luffy calling Erza stupid about using Conquerors Haki. I read that as a more playful and funny scene not a serious one. It would have been funny and a bit cute if Erza called him out like he's the one to talk on him calling her stupid. Rather it seems kinda forced about how much his friends mean to him. Erza catching on to Luffy lying could have also been another comedic scene on how Luffy is just horrible at lying in general. None of these are terrible its just something I'd comment on. Nothing major.
I also got affected by Harvey. My neighborhood was fine, but a lot of friends that lived a few blocks away got utterly destroyed and my Campus got flooded as well. Anyway, I think that about does that. As always, Keep em' coming!
| James123456lu chapter 15 . 7/10
Welcome back and glad that your alright and updating this story
I have some questions that are bugging me
Like Do OC or C from the fairy tail world have iconic laughs i know one piece have because of blackbeard and big mom but in fairy tail i don't think there are people with iconic laughs for example you have kazetaro who is from the fairy tail world.
| xaxiel1572 chapter 15 . 7/10
That must of been hard hope things things take a better turn for you and also awesome chapter as always though those this mean now that they've been found by Jura those that mean they'll get to Fairy Tail much sooner?
| Eminated chapter 15 . 7/7
Pair luffy and erza!
| Eminated chapter 1 . 7/7
Pair luffy and erza!
| Flamarow chapter 15 . 7/5
I was starting to worry about the lack of cuteness until you surprised me at the end. I wonder if she is too young, still too dazed, or just too traumatized to be embarrassed by sharing the bed with Luffy? I'm looking forward to Erza and Cana meeting though I'm really hoping a cat fight doesn't happen, or at least not happen more than once since I'm honestly expecting it to happen.
Also, either I missed it or the note for what kakigori means was missing. I looked it up though and I like the idea. Kind of wish I still had an ice shaver so I could try making it myself. I could definitely see Luffy using that name for an ice wyvern.
Sorry to hear about your hurricane experience. I've been lucky enough to only experience the damages caused by the fringes of hurricanes so far, with just minor flooding and lack of power. I'm glad to hear you are starting to recover and can enjoy writing again.
| AnimeObsessionGirl4ever chapter 15 . 7/4
This is great so far! And I love how all the characters actually act like they're supposed to, it's freaking amazing how good you are at this. I'mma need some tips from you. Also I'm actually worried about Laxus lol I hope he doesn't wake up and go to the Tower only to find out everybody's already gone cause that's gonna give Luffy a shit ton of yelling and probably something worse from Laxus. Man I feel bad for Laxus, he had to go through so much~ Also I heard about Hurricane Harvey and I'm truly, from the bottom of my heart, sorry about what happened. My school raised a fundraiser for it too, and of course I contributed as much as I could. I hope things get better for you from this point on~ XOXO 3
| fresshto chapter 15 . 7/4
Thank you for the update. Btw how old jura. I think it's fine for you take time to update the story, i just hope you don't abandon this story
| Hazard123 chapter 15 . 7/4
1. will you create an oc devil slayer, since we have only one in canon (if i'm not wrong)?
2. in wci arc when luffy fight katakuri, luffy observation haki can see a little to the future even thought it's random. will luffy perfect this ability in thos story?
3. do you follow anime or manga? if manga will you include filler arc from anime?
4. thanks for the update
| AnimeObsessionGirl4ever chapter 10 . 7/3
Pffttt "Moss Haired idiot" GASP SANJI IS THAT YOU?!
| Zoommerfish chapter 15 . 7/3
A fun chapter overall, but a bit rushed in some aspects. If you feel so overloaded try dividing the chapters in half, and working over the half more. It create more chapters and allows you to work on them more thoroughly. cliff-hangers are fun (as long as a 2 year hiatus doesn't follow them).
Also you do know that you can edit chapters after their published right? Just update the document with the omitted stuff and re-upload the chapter. Otherwise it gets confusing. In either case great work, fun stuff.
| DJ Rodriguez chapter 15 . 7/2
Now this was worth the wait! Thanks for updating this story here! It was fun to read!
Thanks also for informing us on what happened in Houston during the flood. I am sorry for your loss, but at least it was mere material things. You still have your family, and surrounded by love and strength, you're doing fine right now. I will pray and ask God to look after you, your family and your grandparents as well. Just glad you and others are alright.
Back to the story, heh... this really reminds me of when Luffy got Sureme as a pet when going down to the Fishman Kingdom. He and Erza really had a hard time against the Ice Wyverns and the Alpha one, but they held together and also had help when needed! I have to say this about the duo; when they are together, its ALWAYS going to be interesting to say the least! Hehehehe...
Also glad to see Luffy explain how Haki works, Erza being quite inquisitive, and finally that Luffy is showing his protective side here. He also seems to be thinking clearly, more intelligently when it comes to protecting his friends. Now that is always good to see here!
While Luffy and Erza recover, it seems that more sinister things are going behind the scenes. Jelleal seems to be recruited into a new organization, and also the players there seem to have some potent magical abilities. I wonder on what is going to happen now...
Excellent chapter, and also glad to hear and see that you are okay! God bless you! Keep it up!
| Soulbow109 chapter 15 . 7/1
Finally got to read the new chapter. First off you are right in that Erza deserves to act like the kid she is. Kinda cute to see it too. Also about kids not thinking about being covered in armor, never heard of the knight in shining armour fantasy? The fight with the Wyverns was pretty cool in my opinion. The part where Erza started to see the alpha as similar to evil Jellal and Tensei was interesting. I like how you focused on Erza a lot during the fight scene since it showed that she isn't your typical damsel in distress and can be pretty strong. That despite Luffy saving her and her trauma she can still hold her own in a fight and not be underestimated. Considering how strong she is without Armament Haki in canon I look forward to seeing Erza in future fights when she learns how to use it. Thinking about it I guess Cana will also be around during those lessons which I imagine will probably result in some pretty funny scenes lol.
Pretty cool to see Jura, wonder how he will affect the two's journey?
The last scene with Luffy and Erza was very nice. Really shows how close the two are and how much Erza treasures and trusts Luffy. Once again it brings to mind that there will probably be some funny scenes once Cana comes into the picture lol. Goodluck Luffy.
The scene with Tensei, Jellel, and the Doc was pretty interesting. I was wondering what happened to those two. Look forward to seeing how things change. Hope the five kids don't suffer too much. Really wonder where Ultear is. Look forward to when Luffy meets her again.
Hope your situation at home has improved.
Look forward to the next chapter.
Oh almost forgot, about the complaints towards Haki. I think you have been doing a good job with how Luffy uses it. It's true that despite having it Luffy hardly uses the Conquerers Haki and there is probably a reason for it even if it isn't mentioned to my knowledge at least. In my opinion, I think you have done a good job of making Luffy strong without coming off as OP. OP characters can be cool, but they can also make the story boring sometimes too. Nice job.
| Necrois chapter 15 . 6/29
Thanks for the update. Also sorry to hear that you and your family are having so much trouble with the flooding.
| Silverscale chapter 15 . 6/28
Gods man, that completely suck. I am just glad you were able to get through that horrible event safely. I am just glad I live in the mountains in my country for when it rains here, it can rain a lot and cause severe flooding.
This chapter was awesome and I am glad to hear you are still working on this story. Keep up the excellent work.