I’ll start off by mentioning that I’m currently in a binge of sorts—going through all the stories written by you and trying to read every single one. I’m a huge fan of your works...except, unfortunately, for this one.

It’s not the genre, pairing or anything like that—Harry/Jasper is one of my favorite pairings in fact(!) and I’ve read many excellent stories in this category that I’ve greatly enjoyed. I just hate “this” version of Harry. And it took me several chapters to pinpoint exactly what about the story that I disliked and I think I’ve narrowed it down to two exact points:

1. Harry is very...callous in this story? His backstory embraces all the cliches with none of the unique ideas you’ve written in your other stories added in. His identity as the MOD, instead of making him seem more human or “compassionate” (is a word you used to describe him in an earlier chapter) only makes him seem like more of...a douche? He spends half the chapters (if not more) lecturing the vampires family on all the character flaws they have when he’s only like twenty years old?
2. Don’t get me wrong, I love some good old character bashing. But these characters introduced so far all seem so one-dimensional because their interactions with Harry all follow the same exact pattern: a. Harry meets them b. Harry points out their flaws c. They take Harry’s words for truth and then look up to him as a god for the rest of the story. In the end, the only thing this accomplishes is that it makes Harry look vastly inhumane and godlike compared to everyone else—to the extent that I question why the story is even categorized as a “romance”. Couples this imbalanced don’t exist willingly and there’s little to no chemistry between him and Jasper anyways.

Harry Potter no matter what his identity is (whether he’s female, a muggle, the MOD, a time traveler, a parent, a lover...etc) is special because he’s compassionate, (you’re right in this aspect)! He’s kind, humble, always willing to help, and most importantly—a reluctant hero! He doesn’t do things because he wants fame or has to help out or feels the need to always be bettering others.

I know I originally said I had two main points of contention with this story but I just realized another one that bothers me quite a bit, even if I’ve encountered worse in my life (unfortunately). I’m guessing you’re probably not from America (and that’s totally okay!) but some things that you say/write are a little bit ignorant to the point where they’re mildly offensive and not just ignorable by me anymore in this story even though I hate being PC. First, you write that the werewolves and others who live on a Native American reservation live in...huts? That’s a mildly offensive assumption isn’t it? Billy Black watches football with Charlie Swan weekly, so they clearly have cable TV and Jacob wants to be a mechanical engineer(?) which means technology isn’t an issue so what makes you think they’d be so primitive as to not have basic housing? Especially considering that they live near Seattle, one of the most technologically advanced cities in the world?

Also some “Waylong Fong or another” had been killed by the nomadic vampires was the exact phrasing you used I believe. Not only am I pretty sure that that is that not the name of the original guy killed in the movie or the books, it’s written so callously as though you mean if it’s a person with a random stereotypical chinese name that you or Harry couldn’t give a fuck about him? I normally would overlook this but this is literally the only “Asian” (and you may as well have named him ding dong ling seriously) you mention in the entire story like wtf are people SUPPOSED to read from this?

Disappointed more than anything,
CharitinaX

I really enjoyed and agree with your opinion on the whole Cullen schooling situation. This has been by far one of the most original takes on the Twilight world i have read. Wonderful job!

oh gosh the last emmett comment got me good still giggling 10 mins after reading it

If you speak the way you write, then it's a wonder nobody force-fed you a dictionary yet.

I’ve read many of your completed stories in the past and enjoyed all of them. After finding out you’re writing TWxHP, I’ve slowly been working my way through your WIPs but I needed something to stop me from being impatient to find out what’s next so here I am. I have high hopes because Jasper/Harry sounds like it could be interesting and any story with Harry bonding with Teddy makes me happy.

I feel like the story was very rushed there at the end and at some poi ts I felt like I was reading an informational text than a story. it just didn't flow as smoothly as the first part of your story did. overall though I did like the fic

Wow that was amazing! I’m so privileged to have been able to read such an amazing story. Thank you so much for the time and effort you put into writing it. I’m very bad at writing my self so really thank you. I love it a lot and I’m so happy you finished it as well a lot of the crossovers are never finished. Again that you for such an amazing story I hope you keep writing even if it’s just small stories, you have a gift and you are very good at it thank you so much!

I liked this story as I like many of your other ones. I can tell that you wrote this a while ago as there are a few grammatical errors as well as it being a bit simpler then your more recent works. I really enjoyed the beginning of it and the world you created. However, I felt the ending was quite rushed and the details weren't fully explained. Overall, it was a great story. Thanks for sharing it with us!

to your question about Jasper's college experience in your authors note maybe look up colleges that have history courses and have him attend for a history major

So I have this story four times already and this is my fifth. But I have never really thought about the image you have for the story. I just thought it was something you found that you liked.

It has finally occurred to me that it is Jasper or Teddy at least but I think Jasper is more likely. It was one of those moments when you smack your forehead because you're an idiot kinda thing.

Vladimir and Stefan from Patricia Briggs?

question, why do writers have relationships happen so fast, like within the first couple of days?

this actually wasnt too bad for a crossover. i finally broke down to read one and i was laughing my butt off throughout the story lol thank you for writing it.

I'm not gonna lie, I was hoping this would end with Harry visiting Ron and Hermione's death beds having had Jasper talk him into it. I've only just gotten into this pairing. I'm still kinda deciding whether or not I like it. I do like the story, however, I kinda wish it had gone more in depth in to Jasper's past, but other than that it was good.

Good story