I don't know why you dropped this one! It is a fantastic start to a great story! I bet if you add a chapter everyone will be reading it tomorrow!

I particularly want to see your take in Dom finding out that Letty is alive and getting her back! Your description of emotions in chapter one was superb and I want to read how Dom responds to the idea that Letty is alive and how he responds to the fact that she doesn't remember him. And the fact that she was so seriously hurt trying to get him back that he has no memory and is in an even more dangerous situation..

Please please keep writing this one!

:-) :-) :-) :-)

Ok. I see that you are building up to Letty being the love of Dom's life. I like the fact that you portray them as equals in this game and not Letty as some lovesick puppy who follows Dom around (like in so many other stories).

Thank you!

Although I have to say that I hated in Los badaleros that Dom is with those other girls when Letty catches up to him. At some point they have to make some commitment to each other and stop playing around. Maybe now that Letty is "dead" Dom will learn ...?
:-)

I agree it was a little harsh for Vince to bring up Letty HOWEVER lets remember that Dom keeps making mistakes leading to devastating losses (the heist that went bad that left Vince in the hospital and Jesse dead-a heist that no one wanted to do but Dom) (Dom's decision to leave Letty for her safety backfired big time when she was killed trying to get him back). Vince is trying to remind Dom that he needs to make better decisions! To think things through.

Wow! Excellent start! I love how you explore Dom's feelings for Letty after she "dies". So few writers show us DOM's side of things. That he actually loved her (he was only "in love" with one woman).

And I get the sense that after all this Dom is finally getting the irony of his actions:

He says that "Loyalty was everything in the world that Dom lived in, and she had really proven herself over the last two years, even if she didn't know it" and yet after she showed him loyalty, HE wasn't loyal to her. Mother splitting up should have been a decision they made together. Not one Dom made to "save" her. (Like she needed saving... )
Cannot wait to read more! You are a great writer!

Ps. If you are going to write a subscript at the end with your comments, please put a separator between your story and your comments. It is very disconcerting to be reading along and then have it change from story to discussion about the story xxx :-)

Great chapter!

With that arrangement there is bound to be drama! Good update.

awesome!

great start! please update soon!

Interesting start!