|Reviews for Doing the Dirty in the Dormitory|
| FireRebel chapter 1 . 1/12
Zesty fic eh
| HP-Lette-Fan chapter 1 . 11/28/2013
Dirty dirty fun times.
| Fireball-Fuchsia chapter 1 . 8/4/2013
Oh my gosh! I was searching for a good Neville x Harry fic and I found it. I absolutely lived this. I especially liked that you made them both take turns topping since with this couple? It can go either way in my opinion. They're just both so similar.
( F ) ( i ) ( r ) ( e ) ( b ) ( a ) ( l ) ( l ) - ( F ) ( u ) ( c ) ( h ) ( s ) ( i ) ( a )
| sleepyalicedreams chapter 1 . 8/3/2013
My on complaint is that it's one big paragraph
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/9/2013
| Consulting Time Heir chapter 1 . 5/6/2013
I hate to say it, but I doubt even a seventeen year old wizard could recover as quickly as Neville did here. Also, just pushing a penis into an anus without any preparation and with only saliva as lube would be very, very painful. And the moment I looked at this, the first thought that came to mind was: "Oof, textwall!" So please try to use paragraphs in the future.
Otherwise, my only complaint is that it's too short. I don't specifically ship Harry/Neville, but this was nice. I notice good grammar and spelling here, which is annoyingly rare, so kudos for that. You could be a very good smut writer, or possibly a good writer in general, though as this is a PWP I can't be sure how you'd handle any kind of actual plot. ;) Just try to mind human anatomy (HP has an easy loophole, there could be charms for stretching and lubricating, so you could write over that pretty easily) and human unwillingness to read one big block of words (people don't have the necessary attention spans for that, sorry).
Please don't be offended, I think you're talented, but could simply use a few tips. It's constructive criticism, rather than flaming. Don't get mad, please? I'm just trying to help. Good luck!
| TheGirlWithTheFictionAddiction chapter 1 . 4/30/2013
Okay, I wrote this as a dare and didn't expect anyone to read it, let alone like it. Seeing as some slightly perverted ( :) ) potterheads out there seem to enjoy it, I propose a challenge. Give me any ship from HP and I'll write a short dirty story about them.
| SweetStrawberryShortCake chapter 1 . 4/11/2013
| Soap23 chapter 1 . 4/4/2013
Interesting pairing ;)
| Sarahostervig1 chapter 1 . 4/4/2013
you need to put more blank spaces in between. this is really hard and tiring to read as it doesn't have an blank holes for the eyes to rest.