Reviews for The Lion King : Prince of the Pride
Francis chapter 9 . 1/27
Please update
osmud chapter 1 . 12/21/2013
me encanta tu historia espero que continues con ella esperando con ancias el proximo capitulo tienes talento para captar la atencion de tus lectores
osmud chapter 9 . 12/21/2013
me encanta tu fic espero que continues tienes talento para captar la atencion de los lectores esperando con ancias el proximo capitulo
Guest chapter 9 . 9/17/2013
Omg I love your story so far, it is much better than alot of the other stories on here and it is filled with alot of original and interesting ideas. Keep up the good work! I hope you update soon!
Daniel chapter 9 . 7/18/2013
This is an awesome story so far. I really like the sort of Patton like attitude that Guvu has. Sarafina's part in this also seems quite interesting.
Update soon, I really want to see this continue.
Zero Unit RGB chapter 9 . 7/11/2013
Fascinating chapter. Guvu is way too harsh with his training, he needs to learn how to chill out. Malka's character is tough but I like how he still has that cub outlook to him. Hasira is definitely an interesting character and when she becomes "queen", I doubt many of the pride members will be all too happy with such a change. But I'm most curious to how Sarabi will react to such a development. The descriptions are very well detailed and much better than anything I can do, nice job!
queenlionesses chapter 9 . 7/10/2013
-Sorry I missed your last chapter. As always, your chapters were intriguing and original.
-I hope a war dose not break out between the two prides, unless the Pride Land lionesses join forces.
-Simba had a close call huh. His head must be spinning with thoughts of home, potential war with his family, aunt nearly spotting him, Truth about Tama's mom and Nala.

-How big is he now, because I am a bit confused on that aspect?
KaltheBrave chapter 9 . 7/9/2013
Really cool chapter Yeti... twisty turny, intersting developments aplenty! I'm very keen to see just how wise Hasira's choice is going to turn out to be. I look for the best in people, so I hope she regrets it pretty soon! :D
And we've still got Simba's conflicts to worry about! I'm very nearly breathless.

Beautifully written again maaaan, I've missed ya! No worries on the update speed and disappearances and whatnot, it's that stupid thing called like that gets in the way I'm sure! Glad to see you back though, well worth the wait!

Adorable little flashbacks with Simba though... aww poor Simbaaaaa : (
Chu10 chapter 9 . 7/8/2013
Oh my gosh that was such a cool twist, I love it! Welcome to the dark side, Hasira! Muahahaha! Yes, villains are AWESOME. And this one is...going to be. I can feel it.

So many things have happened in this chapter, but the good thing is that you really take your time to build up and show us the many colourful characters. I enjoy Malka's presence, he reminds me of some classmates I have. And Guvu? He's that badass warlord that you cannot hate.

The moment between Malka and Simba really put a smile on to my face, because compared with the heavier content, it was a breath of fresh air. They are just playful teenagers, out for a good time and caring for nothing much else - I wish it was always like that! But the scene also goes to show just how much more observant Malka is than Simba. And the both of them together - they already seem like bros for life. Haha! Totally the most fun part of the story although there was no adventure to any far off location or anything out of the ordinary. Great job!

Very nice, when you wrote the hunt I mean. Yep, there are no lionesses like those with Pride lands blood! :P

Ahh yes, and the most interesting twist to the chapter comes when Hasira makes her choice...what a bad choice. But the story dynamics just got far bigger now. What would she do to get the throne? How far will she go? Will she come into conflict with Zira and regret her choice...or will she become one of the most evil lionesses ever to sit on Pride Rock? :O I am so curious now! Please, update soon! You did great here and I am sure it can only get better!

Loved this chapter, even if it was a filler. It's shaking things up for bigger things - and I am excited!
Salunatic chapter 9 . 7/7/2013
Hahax... maybe that's why I never take Red Bull. I'm cranky enough. Hahax...

No worries about the late update. Beautiful quality work is ways worth the wait.

I think your character development is good, especially Hasani's internal struggles. Its sad to see her turn bad, but with circumstances being like this, I guess its not surprising either.

I do hope we'll see more interactions between all the other characters, especially those that we know well.

Keep up the good work!

-salunatic
thingsareweird chapter 9 . 7/7/2013
nice chapter. update soon
T5Tango chapter 9 . 7/7/2013
Whoah, whoa, whoah.

Ok, in the previous chapeters, obviously it was foreshadowed that Zira and her lionesses would try to make an attack on the Pride Landers. However, not until the very moment it happened, did I ever expect that this was going to happen. Just, whoa. And now the webs of deceit and treachery are going to be tangled that much more. Ok, I'll come back to that last scene in a moment.

The part with Guvu was very intimidating. He's somewhere a million miles inside of your imagination and I still felt that he was breathing down my neck...great writing. And I think the part where he scold Malka about being over-confident really shows that he means business. This isn't some silly game to play, there is a real and present danger. When he attacked that older male lion, I think I felt as much shock as the pride did.

You did a good job really putting the reader in the mindset of the lazy easy going pride. Boy is that atmosphere gone with Guvu in charge.

When ever you described him here, through his actions and words, I could liteally feel the seething frustration churning within him.

Oh, and that little speech he gave was freakin' EPIC! I loved how hard and cold he was, trying to reach their stupid, lethargic brains that this way no time to for weakness. And how he kept stressing that if they persisted with their lack of care and effort, they would die. And it was so pinpointed the way not only would the lions, but their mates and children would be dead as well...I mean that was a pierce right through the male's masculinity. And then the graphic picture of the skeletons gave me chills.

"He could be nice at times, but there was something cold, something terrifying about him." This line really put in perspective and amplified the feeling we were getting from Guvu. This lion truly exudes raw power and restrained aggression and it's awesome!

However, the justification of his character in that line was not lost on me. He could be nice at times. I think this was suggesting that while yes, he truly was hard and cold, that his motives are not selfless motives. Maybe he did have problems with his father's policies and decided to leave, but I also think that he cares for his pride and that he values his life.

Malka, oooh he's a cocky one. I think our Simba has met his match in this one! I like him though. I could literally see a smirk on his face when he was fighting the older lion and making jabs at Simba...I particularity laughed at the "princess" one.

For the moment, he just seems like a cocky young male, but I know that there is more to him that we've seen. Simba appears the same way, and we know the guilt that he hides within himself...I wonder what is under Malka.

And the Wivu joke was funny too!

Ok, so your transition from the joking males to them kinda getting worried when they picked up the lioness's scent was really great. I felt the same confusion, then worried excitement as Simba did.

And then the part where he recognized the hunting tactics was so well written; the part where he accepts that the theories that would keep him from coming to the realization that that was indeed his aunt was a really well written.

"Malka's expression told him that the former was not true, and deep down, he knew that the latter wasn't, either." Great, great line!

The small flashbacks were genius...they really built up to Simba's realization. It's like, we know it's his aunt, but because of the clever way it is written, because we are so submerged in Simba's emotion at that point, we don't want to believe it either. Wonderful job!

Now, to the Pride Land lionesses; hmmm very interesting dynamics going on there.
First I just want to say that I laughed out loud when you talked about Sabini liking kids and that Chumvi, being the only cub around, was the sole victim of her pampering...adorable line. Things like that, though they are so small, just really build up a personality of a character.

And it was realistic that Sabini recognized Simba, in a way at least.

Now, back to Hasira.

Whoa, I remember you saying in an earlier chapter that she bit the bullet and didn't stir anything up when Mufasa chose Sarabi. And now those pent up emotions, the ones kept in the depths of her mind, chipping away at her heart have really erupted here.

And that eruption was represented when she exploded at Sabini.

At that moment, I could see that because she was so hurt, so confused, and so bitter...much more than I'd ever thought, that she felt as though any innocent mention of Mufasa or anything like that was a stab at her. And she finally lashed out.

The way in which her eruption led to Zira and her lionesses was so cleverly written, I was totally consumed by the dangerous sensation of it all.

At first, it only seems as though she is letting off her steam, but as she is manipulated you begin to see another side of her. As any good lioness, yes, she was conflicted about betraying her pride, but as those evil lionesses planted ideas in her head, it was sooo scary and intense to see those seeds flourish as the deepest rage took root.

And then, a once pure thing-her love for Mufasa-has now been corrupted into something much more sinister-power lust.

"Isn't that what you've always wanted...to be queen?"

Just, it was just so sickening to see all that take place. And it was absolutely raw to see a character being corrupted and changed at that intense manner. It was really captivating though.

And the justification of her decision-that her pride didn't really care for her-it was just chilling.

As this deep hatred took over her, I could see this montage of memories, bitter memories as you talked about her suffering in the shadows, containing her pain for her pride, and watching everything she desired be given to someone else.

And then her transition, and that last line...yeah it was kinda short, there weren't any long adjesctives to it. No long-winded explantion. But in that short, simple statement, was the most chilling and rattling image of a once broken heart, hardening and twisting itself into a bitter black hole.

This was such an amazing chapter, every scene was just full of such raw emotion. Your characters are developing at a perfect pace. And they are totally relatable. Perhaps I should dislike her now, and fear her I do-for a bitter heart is much more destructive than a numb one-I do hope that Hasira will see happier days, I hope there is a redemption for her.

I look forward to see where this constantly weaving, intertwining, and tangling plot takes us. Good, marvelous, excellent job!
Emerald dreamer96 chapter 7 . 7/5/2013
Very interesting, Hasira's story is tragic in it's own way.

Divided, outnumbered and about to be attacked, this is not looking good.
thingsareweird chapter 8 . 6/25/2013
i hope that if there is war, sima will reunite wuth his family and tama will find her mother. i hope that sarafina and nala are not seperated for too long. great chapter and please update soon.
T5Tango chapter 8 . 6/23/2013
Huh, interesting turn of events, definitely not something that I saw coming.

So, Tojo's uncle, Guvu, yeah I definetly get the George S. Patton vibe from him. Which by the way, that was an EPIC speech he gave to the pride, personally I can't wait to see more of him, even if he is kinda cold, hard, and scary.

But if they are trained, there is no way that wimpy little Scar has the foresight to create a trained army like Guvu is. Or am I underestimating him the way Mufasa did, and we all know how that turned out.

Another moral dilemma for Simba...poor guy.

Oh, and the Tama/Tojo banter was cute and it made me laugh.

So, Sarafina is now in hiding. I have a feeling Scar is going to find her...ooohh...it's not going to end well is it?

So, Zira and her gang know that the Grasslands sees Scar as a threat, what will the outcome of that be when she reports it to Scar?

I really enjoyed this set up chapter and I can't wait to see where you are going to take all of this. It really feels like we are on the verge of the plot thickening quite a bit. Excellent work!
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