Reviews for Dying From the Exit Wounds
MoonlightMystery13.3 chapter 1 . 9/18
*screams for several minutes* That. Was. Amazing. Like, one of the best post-Reichenbach fics I've ever read. The raw emotion conveyed, the perfect analysis of John and Sherlock's friendship, and the characters' reactions are so beautiful and perfect and I love it. Thank you for sharing your gift.
Have a great day!
AlaskanFan chapter 1 . 9/16
Fabulous! You did a wonderful job of writing deep male friendship without the slightest taint of slash. How refreshing! The bullet wound analogy was brilliant!
Guest chapter 1 . 9/3/2015
Wow. I like this.. I forgot it was F.F and thought I was watching the original show!
Guest chapter 1 . 1/3/2015
Can you please make a sequel?
Esther Huffleclaw chapter 1 . 11/19/2013
Oh wow. That was incredible. I feel like there's a hole through me now. Ow, my heart.

I especially loved the extended metaphor of Sherlock-as-bullet ripping through John's life. The way you carried that throughout the piece is masterful. And Sherlock giving John lungs? And now he can't breathe because he's taken them back? Wow. Amazing. Simply wonderful.
Ersatz Einstein chapter 1 . 11/15/2013
This is riddled with grammatical errors and typos, which is endlessly distracting, but it doesn't seem to matter. The lack of dialogue helps give the narration that disconnected feel you were going for. The ending was a tad weak given the strength of the part before it. However, you have some amazing imagery and you use run-ons exceedingly well. (I particularly loved the paragraph right after the one describing Holmes' jump.)
starlight.moon.princess chapter 1 . 10/30/2013
This - this was gorgeous :)

I loved the analogy of the bullet that you've used here. I think it's not only fitting for the situation, but also just as fitting for John to use it, seeing as he is a military man.

You've described his emotions beautifully here - you've explored his friendship with Sherlock to what I believe is near perfection, and you've explained every emotion he feels without outrightly stating the sheer amount of grief and rage.

I particularly liked the part when he confronts Anderson and Donovan. While I, probably like you, have some slight sympathy with the two of them for the way Sherlock treats them, they're just dislikable characters on the whole. There's no reason that two grown people should hold a grudge so childishly, and for so much amount of time, and I can definitely see John losing it at them once the dust settles and the truth begins to sink in.

This was, as I said, gorgeous. You've filled in the gap between Sherlock's "death" and the scene in the graveyard brilliantly with this piece - well done! :)
Carson chapter 1 . 10/24/2013
This story was a bullet.
That hurt.
It was beautiful, but it hurt.
Heather Snow chapter 1 . 10/3/2013
I think this first foray into Sherlock is very good. I think you carried of the stream-of-consciousness sort of perspective from John extremely well, and his state of mind was very believable, very gripping. I feel that you absolutely nailed his characterization.

I loved the explanation about the bullet's entry vs exit wound. I think you explained it well, and it not only fit in very naturally but greatly enhanced the piece. Wonderful metaphor.

The only criticism I have about the whole story is a bit of a nit-pick. The lungs analogy just didn't work for me, because I couldn't move past the fact that you wouldn't even exist without lungs, so there can be no before and after. But, I'm a bit overly logically minded at times, so that may not bother most readers.

Overall, very, very good story. I hope that you will write more in the Sherlock fandom, because this is top-notch.
Browncoats and Floral Bonnets chapter 1 . 9/9/2013
This is one of the best depictions of John Watson that I have ever read in my entire life. He was so spot-on. And Greg! I was really impressed with your characterization of Lestrade. He's one of my favorite characters period and you really did him justice. Besides just getting the characters down, I love the whole comparison of Sherlock to a bullet and the exit wound and WOW, bloody brilliant!
There was a small portion of time when I was confused as to where the characters were location-wise, but that was soon cleared up and probably no fault of your own. I'm a little daft sometimes.
I really, really enjoyed this fic and will probably go back to read it many, many more times! Keep up the good work!
StrawberryDuckFeathers chapter 1 . 7/14/2013

It's great that you researched before you wrote! I like the tidbit of information at the beginning, since it's not a huge info-dump, but a concise description to further the readers' understanding of the piece. [But… well. He didn't see this coming, but he maybe should have.] This was a brilliant enticing sentence. :) I really like that even something as shocking or extra-ordinary as what has happened has greatly worried Watson, even though he's very skilled in the said field. It really gives it that dramatic edge. I also like the twist of the exit wound being a metaphorical one, rather than a literal one.

It's excellent how you've described Watson's feelings about Sherlock- you really clearly show how his life has felt like nothing up to the point in which Sherlock entered his life. I loved the comparison between him not being able to breathe before Sherlock arriving, since it's like he feels he's able to live when Sherlock is around. I also liked the comparison to his life before metting him being like a black and white film. :)

Wow, I loved the shock of Sherlock standing atop the roof. I can bet that was just like a bullet through the chest for poor Watson, so sudden and yet so painful. I like how he's so lost in his grief that his journey from the scene to getting to Lestrade has been mostly forgotten. It's a huge part of his life that's been taken with Sherlock, and now he can't breathe- because Sherlock was what kept him breathing.

I think one of my favourite lines is this one: [where once he'd had skin and bone and muscle but where now he only has an empty, bloody, agonising hole.] I love how it shows that he used to have skin, bone and muscle- three things which I believe are vital to life- and now there's nothing there but a hole, and it's like Sherlock's death has made him feel like he has no life in him anymore.

It's so cool how you've described John's punch in such soft words, as it really gives the vibe that John really doesn't care how much he's hurt Anderson- he's already hurt enough. And I really like how Watson seems to be so hostile towards many people at this point, as if he just wants to get away from it all. I also like how well you show his confusion, as he is only 'pretty sure' that he's yelling. And it's so awesome, the way you describe the rest of the public not knowing Sherlock for who he really was, unlike Watson did.

The ending was so sad, since it seems as if not only Sherlock is dead but, in a sense, so is Watson without Sherlock by his side. :(

Excellent work!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Here is my critique/suggestions for you. :)

. (ok, it wasn't ) 'ok' is better written as 'OK' or 'okay'. :)

. (Stone pavers slams painfully ) Since 'pavers' is a plural, 'slams' would be 'slam.' :)
[ A stone paver slams]
[ Stone pavers slam]

. (Sherlock walked into John's life and gave him lungs and then he jumped back out of it and took the lungs away again ) Since it is mentioned in the previous paragraph, this could be omitted. :)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
This piece really tugs at your heartstrings and so powerfully shows how the death of a close one, or a suicide, or even an attempted suicide as well, can really kill one on the inside, too. It's something that, whilst I cannot relate to it, many others who have lost a dear one will be able to see exactly how Watson feels, and a piece being relatable just makes it even better, since it seems to pull you in more. :)

Amazing work! :D :D
Hurlstien chapter 1 . 7/13/2013
Fandom blind!

[How could he have guessed, when Sherlock fitted in with him so perfectly it was like he was always meant to be there? Like they're two strangely shaped puzzle pieces that make no sense on their own, but that when joined together somehow make a whole that not only works, but works brilliantly and flawlessly and beautifully.] From what I know of the Sherlock series (film and TV) I can totally see where you are coming from with this and you described their relationship really well!

I really enjoyed the comparison of Sherlock in John's life to a bullet wound and the bullet getting bigger and bigger before it finally leaves in a bang, obliterating all around it. All in all, I enjoyed this. I don't know if any of this is canon or not, but either way, it's interesting to know that Sherlock committed suicide, or at least, appeared to. And for what reason? Eh, that's besides the point. This was an excellent one-shot (I didn't find any misspellings or grammar errors, well done) and I'm glad I got to read it :)
Madam'zelleG chapter 1 . 7/10/2013
It was a really great idea to start out with the more technical side of John's medical knowledge. I found that it drew me right into the story, and that it really did make me want to keep reading. I like the way that you make us imagine what it must be like to have such detailed knowledge as you lie there bleeding to death... almost worse than not knowing at all what's really happening to you.

I absolutely loved the puzzle metaphor as well. All of these thoughts going through John's mind are absolutely perfect. Your characterization is brilliant.

This is such a dark piece, and I love the way that you're handling the angst here. I love stories like this, and I have to say that you're doing a fabulous job. Excellent characterization of all the characters, particularly John and Lestrade. I loved the bit about punching Anderson, because we all know that he really did deserve it. And the last line was absolutely perfect... I really have no words... amazing. I really enjoyed this piece.

Cheers, dearie!
riaser chapter 1 . 7/10/2013
Warning: I am completely fandom blind.

I really love how you narrated this piece, and how it seems to span a few different years. It had a very rhythmic vibe, like I was listening to someone talk, and that really made the piece better for me, because, like I've already stated, I'm completely fandom blind.

I think your writing is very descriptive, but it gets a little prose-y sometimes, like when John (?) is telling us how Sherlock made a bullet hole in his life, a tiny entry wound. You state this multiple times with different descriptions that are a little unnecessary.

Otherwise, I think I did enjoy this, it was well thought out and orchestrated. Very well done!
Great Angemon chapter 1 . 7/9/2013
let me just say this; I know absolutely nothing about this fandom. That being said, I did, greatly enjoy this story.

I could feel John's anguish at losing his best friend. It's never easy to lose someone you're close to. Writing about someone who's going through such turbulence is just as difficult, in my opinion.

I don't know if it was intentional, because it seemed to me that you changed halfway through, but the story was written in the past-tense, and while it's a perfectly good way to write, I've always found it harder to follow than other types.

Overall, it was a great story.
24 | Page 1 2 Next »