|Reviews for Sacrifice|
| Passionworks chapter 1 . 4/6/2014
I love Rocketshipping more than any other ship in the Pokémon fandom, and finding really good fics for them has been growing incredibly difficult. It was nice to stumble upon this short little gem!
It was good that you approached this as a challenge, voiding dialogue in favor of letting your own words tell the story. In that regard, you largely succeeded, for you managed to pull off an excellent -though admittedly dark -Team Rocket tale. In all honesty, in the situation the trio was in, there was simply no need for words; their every action spoke incredible volumes. Very well done!
I believe one other reviewer mentioned this, but you made some grammar errors. You sort of also stayed along the same sentence structure, which created for somewhat of a choppy read. Though such a flaw didn't cause me to turn back and stop reading (the plot itself kept me well along for the ride, I'm happy to say), you sort of have to watch out for that and sometimes proofread aloud. Hearing the words themselves can help you determine if something sounds choppy, or rushed, or overdrawn. Think of it as almost a study of human language; how we structure our sentences when we speak amongst others is how basically we should write.
Otherwise, I'm impressed! Most Rocketshipping stories give James the role as the one to give himself up (as that was how he acted in 'Training Daze,' the Chronicles episode where they trained together). Seeing Jessie make that ultimate sacrifice was refreshing. Jessie might be selfish, but for James she has a big heart. You proved that here, and I loved seeing it!
You pulled this piece off marvelously! Thank you for posting this and sharing it! It well earns a fave from me!
| GaliCat chapter 1 . 2/19/2014
Aww... so sweet...
Jessie may be the last member of the TRio that I'd think of to make the ultimate sacrifice for the other two, but that just makes it all the more touching when she does. Having to do what's necessary to protect her friends...
And poor James! What's an emotional overdoser like HIM going to go through, realizing that the love of his life has sacrificed her own for him? I'm imagining that Meowth might have to talk him out of suicide by pointing out that he'd be wasting Jessie's sacrifice if he killed himself...
What a tragic, beautiful tale. Thank you for writing this.
| Confumzled chapter 1 . 1/25/2014
Woah! What did I just read...I really don't know but it was awesome and had my heart pumping. I wish I could read more.
| JX Valentine chapter 1 . 9/13/2013
I'm a sucker for angsty Rocketshippy fics, and this one took me back to the awesome that was the earliest ones. You had darkness, drama, and of course the unbreakable bond between Jessie and James (and, okay, Meowth too), and it was just implied that they cared about each other. I mean, one of the things that really works for this fic is that there's no dialogue. There doesn't NEED to be dialogue. Everything that they have to say is in their actions. Jessie doesn't need to tell James how much she loves him; she just gives him a passionate kiss and shoves him to safety. She doesn't need to say anything to Team Plasma. She just goes down in literal flames as one last up yours as she gives up everything to protect James. It's very restrained, but it doesn't need to go into detail. It's just beautiful.
The downside is that the grammar could use some cleaning. Ignoring simple errors, there was a lot of sentence repetition going on (including things like beginning three paragraphs in a row with Jessie and repeating "she" as a sentence beginner in the paragraph about the kiss). And that sounds really anal, but at times, it gives the narration a little bit of a choppy feel when at some points, you want something that flows a bit smoother. My advice would be to read your work aloud at some point to figure out how your prose sounds.
But otherwise, this was nice.
| Tawny chapter 1 . 9/12/2013
| Cross-Flame chapter 1 . 9/11/2013
Aw, I've never seen tragic, serious, stories like this...
I've also noted that you didn't place the R&R, or "don't like, don't read" footnotes in your summary, which is also good. So, practically, this is perfect. :)
| Rin chapter 1 . 7/10/2013
At the ending of each sentence I read, My eyes got more and more teary. Once the story finished, I closed my eyes and 5 tear drops fell. You are a amazing writer! At first I thought James was going to die until Jessie did.