|Reviews for Time-travelers|
| Eeveexme chapter 3 . 5/21/2013
OMG! I feel so sorry for the pichu! PLUS I LOVE the way you make Dawn have a Zoroak(sp?)! YOU'RE AN AWESOME WRITER!
| Iloveikari chapter 3 . 5/21/2013
I wonder who this ivy person is. IT is obvious that she is related to Dawn since this is in the past and they look alike in many ways. I think Paul might have a crush on Ivy but she went to another man or Paul's a friend of Ivys and she just dissapered. OHHHH! The susspension is killing me right now!
Oh and That Bellistone guy...I want to kill him right now. PICHU IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POKEMONS! HOW DARE HE! I hope the girls find him soon because I want him to feel some kind of pain he is putting in the pokemon. XD
Anyway! Update as soon as you can! Can't wait until the next chapter. and hopefully find out who this Ivy girl is.
| XTwilightsxBeautyX chapter 3 . 5/21/2013
cool keep writing please :) and poor pichu... -crys-
| TheBlackPrince3 chapter 3 . 5/21/2013
OMG that bellystone! He is a jerk... the nerve of his to hurt those poor pokémon. Anyway, the chapter was great! Yes, I'm the same pikachu0311 who reviewed the previous chapters as a guest. I was wondering if you could check out my story. It's called 'Luke's Pokémon Adventure: Kanto'. I want you to tell me how well I did on my first attempt. Thanks!
| Cloud Reflection chapter 2 . 5/17/2013
I think this story has potential, but there's still room for improvement. So far the plot is pretty good. It seems like there's going to be serious dilemmas with the girls and boys once the girls have to leave.
Anyways, I noticed that you don't space out the dialogue.
She examined herself in the mirror and with satisfied look, she was about to head to the kitchen for breakfast when May burst out from the bathroom. "Where's my brush?" She asked. "On the table." Hilda answered. "Where's my comb?" "On the sink." "Where's my toothbrush?" "In your hand." Hilda frowned. "Oh, right." May quickly closed the door.
Here's how it should be:
She examined herself in the mirror and with a satisfied look. As she was about to head to the kitchen for breakfast, May burst out from the bathroom.
"Where's my brush?" She asked.
"On the table." Hilda answered.
"Where's my comb?"
"On the sink."
"Where's my toothbrush?"
"In your hand." Hilda frowned.
"Oh, right." May quickly closed the door.
And you probably know this, but the people actually have given last names: Dawn Berlitz, May Maple, Drew Hayden, Paul Shinji...well they aren't given but they're generally used. I don't know about Hilda and Hilbert though. I'm just curious to as to why you chose different last names.
Overall, I like this story so far, and I'll continue reading it. Good luck writing! :)
| Iloveikari chapter 2 . 5/17/2013
OH I hope that girl that Paul and his cousin talked about is Dawn. Its cute if his heart pounded because it was caused by Dawn in any means. I love this chapter! Hilbert just sounds like a total stalker and stuff so I really feel bad for Hilda. I always thought Drew and Dawn would be best friends or they have a brother-sister relationship. The seem like they could be related. Its just my opinion. :)
Oh is Dawn's last name Von Vietta? I got confused there.
Well anyway I can't wait until the next chapter! I hope you update as soon as you could!
| XTwilightsxBeautyX chapter 2 . 5/17/2013
plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz PPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLZZZZZZZZZZZZZ keep writing ppppppppppppllllllllllllllzzzzzzzzzzz... XD
| pikachu0311 chapter 2 . 5/17/2013
Yeah, another wonderful chapter! I didn't think that Ash and Misty were in this story too. Thanks for the great chapter and I hope you'll update ASAP.
| Eeveexme chapter 2 . 5/17/2013
AHHH! Why is Paul's heart pounding? Is it because of Dawn?! ;)
| XTwilightsxBeautyX chapter 1 . 5/15/2013
awesome plz carry on :) i'll give ya a cookie if you do.
| Eeveexme chapter 1 . 5/15/2013
This is sounding so good! I hope you will write more soon! Plus i can't wait to know who Bellistone is and i most definitely can't wait until the guys appearance! ;)
| pikachu0311 chapter 1 . 5/15/2013
Great! I would have liked if ash, gary, leaf and misty would be there too. Anyway, it's nice in this way too. I hope that the next chapter will be great too. And please please please update ASAP.
| Nauran chapter 1 . 5/15/2013
No Ash Ketchum? I guess you don't want any reviews then. Humph! (crosses arms huffily)