Reviews for Lighting Up the Dark |
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![]() ![]() I really don't like Orochimaru dead. I like this character too much, I hope he'll be alive as he was in the original. I do wait for the next chapters! I wish every imaginable goods to the author. |
![]() ![]() ![]() "unfairly jumped to the right conclusions," lol. "Performatively stoic," also lol. I imagine "seeing the hidden side of the hidden side" is a better translation than "looking underneath the underneath." Thank you for making me aware of it. The serious superfan-ness of Kakashi and the café owner is also funny. Go, Hinata, standing up for her agency! Oh my god, the twist reveal is like something out of a soap opera. As expected of Jiraiya. I'm guessing Tsunade either killed Raijin or failed to save him. Wait, no, eleven years ago is too early for that, and she wouldn't be only potentially on the nemesis list. Hm... Maybe the gravity of this is misleading and it's something less serious, like she bad-mouthed or turned her back on Sarutobi or she said she hated ramen. Calling it a "sin" makes me think it's ramen-related. There are some formatting issues in this chapter: a lot of missing spaces between words, usually but not always around an italicized word, and the center formatting for the scene divider is broken. I immensely enjoyed this chapter. The subterfuge, the code stuff, the humor: chef's kiss. I'm sad I've once again reached the current end, but this is a good chapter to pause on. With how well crafted this story is, I imagine each chapter takes you a long time, but the wait will be worth it for more of the same quality you've displayed up to this point. Best wishes to you! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Autistic Tenten is a novel angle for me. Also, if anything were to convince me this Naruto is a shonen protagonist, it's how many girls (well, love interests) he's picking up. You got me with the bait-and-switch. I thought Hiashi heard about the date and called him for another meeting, up to the last second. Well done. Man, I hope Naruto gets some sense talked into him. I fear the most fruitful source of mind games, cunning, et cetera for the story to feature would be him joining Root, though. "A little" brainwashing, ugh. The naiveté and/or arrogance of this boy. Yeesh, that's a hell of a lot to dump on a person at once. Her using the Voice is a nice touch for the emotional impact. |
![]() ![]() ![]() For a minute I thought this was going to be a _Worm_ crossover. Please tell me if the tailed beast (brained beast?) reimagining is at least partly inspired by those shards. I enjoyed the discussion and resolution. I like how the resolution resembles Naruto talking people down canonically but is still plenty original. Ohhhhh no. Geez, you've made me lament Orochimaru getting taken out. Though, on second thought, I guess it's _because_ he's not/less evil here that he's more able to be killed off while maintaining a sense of conflict. I forgot to mention last chapter, but I like the idea that Hyuga brains are just built different and a normal brain can't handle byakugan information overload, so they have to covert the information for someone else to be able to use it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Lol at the team names. Ooh! This ought to be good! |
![]() ![]() ![]() The last scene is fascinating to me. The rogue mentions of the Will of Fire by Sakura and maybe someone else besides Hiruzen are ominous, like the result of some kind of propaganda. |
![]() ![]() ![]() The genjutsu—ooh, that brilliant! And the obelisks! I like how conniving Hiruzen is in this situation, such that everything is a tactical consideration. The repeated leaning on the fourth wall by referring to the idea of them being in a manga continues to entertain me. I'm intrigued by the declaration. My best guess is Orochimaru somehow found out about the Moon Eye plan. The Uchiha egotism is weird. Also, what "Uchiha powers" is he talking about other than the sharingan? Uh-oh... |
![]() ![]() ![]() This is a fascinating fight. Though, the rotation/heavenly spin emits chakra in a complete sphere around the user, which is why it leaves a divot in the ground, so Hinata wasn't in danger from an attack from below. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Good match. Oh, that's a juicy, Tsunade-shaped hook. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Title drop! I am HERE for genuine sage Jiraiya. Oof. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh my god, Naruto is so much purer in this universe! It's striking. He literally shows Konohamaru a girly mag in, like, the first episode of canon. Then again, that doesn't mean he would understand innuendo... Jiraiya and Seijin are very entertaining together. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Lol the opening paragraphs—and at Naruto apparently not getting it. Also, the mention of thrusting reminded me: it's intriguing that Jiraiya has to use hand motions to shape the chakra. The elemental training is cool. I like Hiashi's scene, too. I'm interested in what caused the massacre confrontation to apparently be different. (Good job writing child Sasuke, by the way.) |
![]() ![]() ![]() Rereading after years and this is new ground for me. The lore drop is really interesting. I definitely picked up on the arrogance. It's also intriguing that Orochimaru apparently is genuinely less evil in this universe. You hit the right notes with Jiraiya, I think: boastful but backs it up, womanizing (the metaphors are entertaining), dropping sage wisdom on Naruto, the "I'm an adult and you're a kid" type of condescension. Overall, I don't remember if I ever wrote it before, but I greatly like and appreciate how much everything people do in this universe /makes sense/. I'm too tired to think of a way to elaborate on that at the moment, so I hope you get what I mean. |
![]() ![]() ![]() To be fair, he didn't cheat them out of their income because Gatō was demonstrably not going to pay them. Even if he didn't confess to them, Haku could get confirmation from the mercenaries. |
![]() ![]() omg you're updating again :O it's so GOOD! |