|Reviews for The Unforeseen Variable|
| Macilnar chapter 5 . 4/12
I know this is cancelled but I can't help but point out that Patroni, or at least a variant of them, can be used to send verbal messages.
| Lord Sheffield chapter 1 . 3/27
I am looking forward to the full TES strory.
| automaton14 chapter 14 . 2/22
I feel like Harry is losing himself. Like he doesn't know who he is anymore.
| Linda chapter 31 . 2/21
This story was trash anyway. It was constant boring Viking bullshit that completely uninteresting. You wasted the interest built from the "cross over" by making Harry not at all Harry almost immediately at the start of the story. Not enough of the original character carried over into Skyrim and he was mostly just a boring, grouchy OC that did boring, slow-moving Viking crap.
How many words were wasted on an invasion that had the sole purpose of giving Harry the ability to apparate again, only to completely gloss over it and have him apparate once after the more interesting part (creating some kind of dimension to allow for the teleportation in the first place) happened off-screen with no details offered.
The dragon stuff where he lost the Hallows to some sentient dragon facet of himself was also really poorly done and tiresome. I don't believe for a second that Harry, who comes from a culture that has possession and mind reading, wouldn't have been able to bring that part of himself to heel and assimilate it properly.
Honestly, I don't know why I kept reading this story. I thought maybe it would get past the monotonous garbage of Viking and political nonsense that might have been necessary at the start of the story and actually get into more fun to read plot lines that benefited from Harry being a powerful, well-learned wizard from another world... but it never happened. The closest was the small battle against the Daedra where half of it was spent in the mind of that boring elf girl who wanted to try playing manipulative seductress (but constantly failed) and was... maybe enthralled by his power? Or turned off by it? It wasn't at all clear because you, the writer, kept rambling and contradicting yourself.
Sadly, that invasion was probably also the closest thing to an interesting event happening in this story. And yet, it was boring and felt rushed. The story was slow and boring, yet it felt rushed and poorly planned.
Remaking this story as solely a TES story would remove the small fragment of anything remotely interesting. It would be a pointless endeavor. Why would I want to read that story when I can just play Skyrim? Why would anyone?
I guess it's a good thing that you've basically abandoned writing, because you were not very good at it. You spent far too much time focused on uninteresting minutiae instead of focusing on what people actually wanted to read: Harry Potter, Master of Death, in Skyrim
| automaton14 chapter 10 . 2/21
LOL at the the random junk getting in his inventory
| ArtimuosJackson chapter 1 . 1/31
Wow not just this Harry potter is second coming of Voldemort but a real bastard too which means total OC
| DarkSolaris57 chapter 16 . 11/28/2016
Giving away the power of the hallows even to an abstract concept within his soul is freaking dumb and ruined the story. His soul is the master of death and not some split personality that only exists because his new body. You have permanently maimed him. He is only getter weaker as the story progresses so far. skill in the sword and the ability to shout versus all powerful hallows and wizardry.
| Guest chapter 1 . 10/13/2016
Well that was a rather grim look at a Harry Potter lifespan. You come across as very anti-muggle. With Harry's actions in the second war, it is understandable, but the idea that every nation on the planet would be annihilated in a nuclear holocaust is laughable. Beyond the social reasons for why many nations would be excluded, nuclear fallout from a bomb is NOT the same as a nuclear meltdown of a power plant. In an H-bomb, the radioactive isomers chosen are those which can release their energy quickly, and they thus have a very fast decay. Power plants are meant to be stable and sustainable, using long half-life isomers, which is why a meltdown can be so catastrophic. In either case, the worst world-wide effect these could have is a shift in weather patterns, which could lead to widespread food crises. The risk of radiation itself, however, would be minimal.
| The.Wholock.Brony.Assassin chapter 1 . 9/12/2016
I have totally forgotten why I clicked this story, because that intro was just so amazing.
| Blapzapp chapter 31 . 9/3/2016
Awhhh man I was really loving this story I'm not going to lie. I love how you wrote, honestly it's hard to find good story's with op characters that aren't overly cocky about what they can do. Thank you for writing it this far man
| randomreader chapter 28 . 8/20/2016
I still look forward to the day you convert this story to a pure Elder Scrolls fanfiction. It will be a great story to see how a uniquely powerful individual can gather the right allies necessary to take the battle to the Daedra in their realms where they are almost as mortal as humans. Please dont forget this story, its such a great idea that does not need the Harry Potter franchise to drive it forward
| rachel.weck.5 chapter 31 . 7/28/2016
New this going in but sad i liked the laughs this caused
| asingh123 chapter 10 . 7/19/2016
Never was interested or looked into Elder Scroll before
thought that with Harry, understanding will come... but it didn't
To me plot is unknown, and so felt too chaotic...
but one thing I can say is that the story is too linear and organized... I mean for a 200yrs old man, who is both a scholar, a warrior, Master of Death and have jumped dimension, your Harald seem too much interested in a simple and organized life... 'let all the stages come to me' kind of thing
| KitkatMoon chapter 31 . 6/18/2016
| szmtex chapter 16 . 5/24/2016
dropped this chap was total clusterf*ck completly destroyed story